


You Sleep Alone

by defenselesswriter



Series: Lovers [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Stiles, Derek and Stiles are Mates, Derek is Stiles' Anchor, F/F, M/M, Magic!Stiles, Mates, Post 3a, Stiles is Derek's Anchor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-24
Updated: 2013-09-14
Packaged: 2017-12-24 12:06:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 14
Words: 54,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/939823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defenselesswriter/pseuds/defenselesswriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The nemeton brings back the sacrifices...plus one more. One could say there is magic in the air.</p><p>Title and chapter titles are from the song You Sleep Alone by Hellogoodbye, my go to writing music.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What A Mess

Everything is tied up in a neat little bow. Alpha pack? Deucalion is gone. Darach? Dead. Cora dying? Healed. Derek being the worst alpha in the history of alphas? Beta and he’s gone.

Now Scott’s a true alpha. Even has his own pack, which Stiles _is_ second in command (shut up, Isaac. This isn’t Derek’s pack).

Everything is solved. His dad is safe, and he knows all the werewolf secrets. So why is Stiles so sad?

He’s asked about it. Scott and Allison feel it, but only sometimes. Stiles feels constantly morose. And tired. He can’t remember the last time he slept without having nightmares.

He can still feel death lurking around somewhere like Stiles will die at any moment. It’s freaking him out. He feels like he’s constantly on the verge of having a panic attack, his breath constantly shallow like it’s just a second away from hyperventilating. Or just stopping altogether.

Stiles can’t sleep in the dark anymore. He has to keep on a lamp at all times. He can’t go back to complete darkness. He doesn’t think he ever will be able to until he dies permanently.

Huh. Isn’t that something to think about? Dying permanently. Not just dying. No, Stiles has to add in the permanent part because he has died before. Just not for more than a day. Only sixteen hours.

That’s what Stiles can’t wrap his head around. He was _dead_. For sixteen hours. _Dead_. He always kind of hoped that once he died, he would see his mom’s smiling face, but that didn’t happen. Nope. He just had a major flashback that solved the mystery.

What the fuck is his life?

“Stiles!” Scott says, bursting through Stiles’ door. Stiles didn’t even hear the front door. He’s just sitting in front of his window like he is waiting for someone, but the only person who ever comes through his window is out of town now. Indefinitely. Probably forever.

“What’s up, Scotty?” Stiles says, turning his attention to his best friend/alpha. “I mean. Alpha Scott. Or should it be Alpha McCall?”

Scott just gives him a dry look. “We’ll talk about it later. Right now, we kind of have some bigger issues.”

Stiles up straighter and spins around completely in his desk chair to fully face Scott. “Monster of the week commencing?”

Scott shakes his head and starts pacing. That’s never good. “Stiles, it’s about Heather…”

“Heather?” Stiles asks. “She’s dead.”

Scott takes a deep breath, his red eyes bleeding through for a second. “That’s the thing, though. She’s not. All of the people who were sacrificed, Stiles. They’re back.”

“What?” Stiles doesn’t know what to say or how to say it. “They’re all back? All of them? Even Mr. Harris? Fuck…”

Scott laughs once, but he doesn’t seem entirely amused. Well, neither is Stiles. People coming back to life? That’s not something happens and now it’s happening twice in a week. Did Peter fucking start something?

“How?” Stiles asks. “And what about their injuries?”

“It’s like they never were kidnapped or murdered,” Scott tells him. “Deaton found them wandering around the nemeton. They’re completely healed, and they’re all just really confused. Heather still thinks it’s her birthday. It’s like the last two weeks never happened.”

Stiles drops his head in his hands, sighing. “Have you talked to Deaton about it yet?”

Scott shakes his head. “He called me to come see everything because I didn’t believe him at first. He sent me out to get you while he talks to them all.”

“Why me?” Stiles asks, unsure.

“You’re my second in command,” Scott answers like it’s obvious. “If I’m going to be making alpha decisions, I need you. Deaton wants to talk to us both about it. We both know you’ve always been the brains in our duo.”

Stiles beams at him and stands up. “Alright. Let’s go.”

They jump into Scott’s mom’s car because the jeep is still at the mechanics. Stupid fucking storm making Stiles crash into a stupid fucking tree. His head still kinda hurts, but it’s pretty much the bottom of his priority list right now.

Once at the vet’s office, Stiles practically runs into the office. “Heather,” Stiles calls out, looking around until he sees the blonde. He folds her into his arms. “Thank God you’re alive.”

“Deaton,” Scott calls out.

Heather just looks up at Stiles confused. “What the hell happened, Stiles? Last night we were about to…and now it’s morning. What kind of stupid prank is this? Did you slip me something?”

Stiles shakes his head and sighs, letting her go. “I need to go talk to Deaton. I’ll be back.” He goes into the back, Deaton and Scott already talking. “First question, what the hell are we going to tell everyone?” he asks loudly to the room. “These people’s bodies were found, dead and made public.”

Deaton looks at Stiles, his cool face showing the slightly panic that Stiles is feeling. “I have no idea,” he admits smoothly. “We may need to call your father in and see if he can help us.”

“Maybe we should send them away? Like witness protection?” Scott suggests looking at the both of them.

Stiles shrugs. “You think these people are just going to leave their families?”

“It’s better than being dead,” Deaton says with a shrug.

Stiles rolls his eyes. It’s true (Stiles knows from experience), but he still doesn’t like it. “How are they even alive?”

Deaton frowns. “I have a theory. It might be that the power Ms. Blake got from the nemeton leaked out of her once she died, giving the nemeton the power to bring balance to the world by bringing these people back.”

Stiles frowns at that, Scott’s face mirroring his. “What are we going to do about them?” Scott asks, bringing the most important question back.

Another shrug from Deaton. “You’re the alpha, Scott. It’s completely up to you.”

“He’s not the alpha, I am,” a voice says, interrupting their little meeting. All of their heads turn to see the new addition to the room.

Fuck.


	2. Your Body's in My Bed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Stiles does have a panic attack in this chapter, so if that will trigger you please exit out. I'd much rather you be okay than you read my story.

“Laura?” Stiles finally says, confused as fuck.

“Yeah, who the fuck are you?” she asks and then looks at Scott with a raised eyebrow. God she looks so much like her brother. “And you think you’re the alpha? This is Hale territory, and it will always be Hale territory. Are you the little shit that made me leave New York?”

Scott just shakes his head and swallows. He obviously has no idea what to say, so Stiles jumps in. “You guys figure out what to do with the not-sacrifices-anymore, and I’ll talk to Laura?” he suggests.

Laura doesn’t like it. “I am an alpha. I’m going to discuss territory and treaties with the alpha.”

“He’s the second in command,” Deaton tells her, trying to keep the peace like the emissary he is.

“He’s human,” she says with a frown.

“Yes, but I know my way around mountain ash, so don’t test me,” Stiles tells her, and she just laughs at him like he’s pathetic. He gets that reaction a lot sadly. “And we’re not discussing treaties and whatever. There’s something we need to talk about.”

Surprisingly, Laura stops putting up a fight and lets Stiles lead her out of the vet clinic. “Coffee?” he asks her, pointing at the coffee shop down the road. With her nod, they go and order some coffee before sitting down. “Laura, what’s the last thing you remember before waking up this morning?”

She frowns, looking down into her coffee. “I was fighting a wolf. He was trying to kill me. Probably to steal my alpha powers. You know how that works, right?” She looks up at him like it just occurred to her that he is human and he might not know anything. Come on. He’s Alpha Scott’s right hand man. That says something, doesn’t it?

He just nods. “Your brother did a very lovely demonstration for me,” he says softly, watching Laura’s reaction carefully.

“My brother is in New York,” she says sharply. “Isn’t he?”

Stiles shrugs. “I have no idea where Derek and Cora are.”

“Cora is dead,” Laura practically growls. “What the fuck are you trying to say, boy? Tell me.”

“My name is Stiles,” he says instead. “This is a pretty intense conversation we’re getting into, so I thought we should do proper introductions.” His father raised him with some manners, okay.

“Laura.” Her voice is pissed like she is seconds away from snapping his neck. It sounds strangely like Derek’s, which makes a knot in Stiles’ stomach.

“Laura, you died a year ago,” he finally states and sips at his coffee, holding up a hand when she opens her mouth to say something. “I think it might be best if you wait for me to finish. Scott and I found your body a year ago in the preserve, but only the top part. Someone cut you in half and killed you. At first, we thought it was Derek, who came down to Beacon Hills to find you. Derek thought it was the hunters luring him there.

“We were all wrong. It was your uncle, Peter. The only way for him to heal completely from his vegetable state was to steal your alpha powers or whatever. Peter is just a long story of creepiness and sass.” Stiles sighs, finishing.

“Why am I alive?” she asks. “Supposing you’re telling the truth, which at least you believe you are.”

“Go ask someone what the date is,” he tells her, gesturing. “Actually, please do. I have a phone call I need to make.”

With a glare, she stands up and goes to talk to someone, throwing a smile on and being charming while Stiles gets his phone out and dials the last number he thought he would ever use.

“Derek?” he says after getting voicemail. “It’s Stiles. I know you left for whatever reason and everything, but you need to come back like yesterday. It’s about Laura, and I think you should really be here. It’s hard to explain over the phone, but we…we need you here, Derek. Please.”

Laura sits back down with an eyebrow raised. “Okay, you’re telling the truth. Why are you calling Derek?”

“To bring him back to Beacon Hills,” he answers swiftly. “He probably wants to see his sister.”

She smiles softly at her coffee cup. “How am I alive?”

“The nemeton,” he answers simply and she gives him a confused look, so he goes on to explain it. How the emissaries use it for power and to bring balance, and then he explains the sacrifices to her. Then he explains Ms. Blake dying, skipping over the part where she seduced Derek because no one has no idea what the fuck that was. Seriously. Why would she seduce Derek? To make him work with her?

“It’s been quite the year in Beacon Hills,” she says dryly.

“You haven’t even gotten to hear the story about the kanima,” Stiles tells her with a laugh. “That’s a doozy, but without so many plot twists.”

She laughs once and sighs. “Wow. This is pretty crazy. Wait. Where’s Peter now?”

Stiles shrugs. “Probably hiding out in his lair. Derek killed him, became the alpha, but then Peter possessed Lydia, a friend, and came back from the dead. Then Cora got really sick, so Derek used his alpha power to heal her, so now he and Peter are both betas. Or wait. They’re omegas, right?”

“Not for long.” Her voice is hard, determined. Stiles can already tell that she will make a good alpha. Hopefully her and Scott can get along and situate the whole territory thing.

“We should probably get back to Deaton’s,” Stiles tells her. “We need to figure out what to do with everyone.”

So on the way there, Stiles calls his dad. “Hey, Dad,” he says when his dad answers. “If you’re not busy, could you meet us at Deaton’s? Something came up, and I think we might need the Sheriff.”

“Stiles,” his dad says, voice hard. “No bodies, right?”

“Quite the opposite actually,” Stiles chimes, smiling slightly. It might be a pain in the ass to figure out how to deal with these people, but at least they’re not dead anymore, which is good. Right? Right. “It’s easier to explain in person with the evidence in front of you. Can you come?”

“Yeah,” the man answers and hangs up.

Once they’re at the office, Stiles gets a text. From Derek.

**_From: Derek (15:07): On our way._ **

Stiles smiles slightly and shows the text to Laura. “Good,” she says with a nod.

They enter the office and go past the counter to Deaton’s office. “Okay, she’s filled in. We’re good.” Stiles says once the step in.

Scott and Deaton are frowning. “Heather got ahold of phone,” Scott says, looking tired. “She called her parents.”

Is now a good time to panic? “And?” Stiles gestures wildly, waiting for them to get to the point.

“They thought she was missing,” Scott finally answers. “No one remembers finding her body. Any of theirs.”

“Why are we exempt from that?” Stiles asks.

“You, Stiles, are a spark, and Scott is an alpha,” Deaton answers. “It would’ve taken too much power for the nemeton to make you two forget finding the bodies as well as the rest of your pack. Plus, you, Scott, and Allison are all tied to death and to the nemeton now. It had no reason to use the magic on you.”

“Fuck,” Stiles sighs. “I called my dad. He’s on his way. Will he remember finding the bodies?”

Deaton nods once. “He spent much time with the nemeton, but no one else will remember the bodies.”

Stiles just laughs. “Deaton, I thought we were going to have monsters of the week, not spells casted over the entire town.”

Deaton gives Stiles a dry smile. Then the Sheriff steps in, his eyes hard and wild. “Stiles, why is Heather in the waiting room of the vet’s office and all of the other sacrifices?”

Stiles looks to Deaton, hoping he will take over this part. Stiles has done enough explaining today, so Scott, being the best alpha ever, takes over and explains everything. Stiles is suddenly extremely tired.

They decide to send Heather and one other girl, Emily, Stiles thinks (he wasn’t paying attention to names, okay?) to the station with the Sheriff, and the others will slowly return to their normal lives. If they all went in at once, Stiles points out, it will be really sketchy that they all disappeared around the same time and came back together.

Which is how Stiles gets stuck housing Laura. They were splitting up missing persons, and Laura kind of just forced herself on Stiles, and he just couldn’t say no. So he did, on the way back to his house, she whispers to him that she’s staying at the Hale house.

“Can you at least check in with me every day?” he asks her. “I’ll keep you updated.”

She nods. “I’m going a town over and grabbing a phone. Give me your number and we’ll keep in contact.”

Stiles does as she asks and watches her run out of sight, back to her house. He sighs and goes up the stairs, knowing his dad is going to be working late tonight. Like, really late. Making sure to turn on every light on his way, he throws the laundry into the washer, including the clothes he was wearing.

He walks into his room in just his underwear to find some clothes before taking a shower. He turns on the light and jumps when there’s a body on his bed. “Shit!” he exclaims, leaning against the door to get his breathing back. “Fuck, Derek. You can’t just sneak up on a guy like that.”

Derek just eyes his lack of clothes before staring up at him. “Your voicemail seemed pretty urgent. What’s going on?”

“Can I get some clothes on first please?” Stiles asks. “Wait, no. It’s been a long ass day. I’m taking a shower first and then I’ll be back, and I’ll give the 411 on the supernatural shit I got to deal with today.” Derek’s eyebrows just raise at him like he’s bored to be here. “Make yourself at home.” Stiles gestures widely at the house before gathering sweat pants, a t-shirt, and underwear.

He takes the fastest shower of his life before shoving on clothes and walking back to his room, scrubbing the towel through his hair. He throws it on the floor before crashing into his desk chair and looks Derek right in the eye, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.

“You’re not going to believe me,” he starts out with. “So just listen to my heartbeat and remember that I’m the world’s worst liar and that over the last year, we’ve learned to tentatively trust each other.”

Derek gives him a confused look, sitting up at the serious tone of the conversation. “Get on with it, Stiles.”

“Laura is alive,” he spits out, his stomach clenching. “I…after the darach died, her power leaked into the nemeton and brought back all the sacrifices and even went as far as to bring back Laura. We don’t know why yet, but she’s alive.”

Derek’s face is frozen. Unmoving. Stoic. He’s shell-shocked. He doesn’t say anything; he’s just staring at Stiles, but it feels like he’s looking right through the teenager and not seeing anything.

“Derek?” Stiles calls out, standing up and walking over to him. He puts a hand on his shoulder and tries to look into his eyes. “Derek, buddy. You okay?”

“Laura is alive,” he repeats dumbly, still not focused on Stiles

“Yep,” Stiles says, popping the “p”.

“Laura is alive,” Derek says again, his eyes slowly coming into focus to look at Stiles. “She’s alive. My sister is alive. Both of my sisters are alive.”

“Speaking of which, where was Cora for the last six years?” Stiles asks, completely changing the subject.

Derek doesn’t appreciate it. He just gives Stiles a look that’s bordering on a glare. “I don’t know,” he finally snaps, and Stiles accepts it.

He goes back to his desk chair, watching Derek. “Not to kick you out or anything, but don’t you want to see Laura?” Stiles asks as his phone vibrates on the desk. He picks it up.

**_From: Unkown (22:27): I got a phone. Can I have Derek’s number? If you see him before I do, thank him for keeping all my stuff where it was._ **

Stiles texts Laura back with Derek’s number and that he’ll pass on the message, which he does.

“So she’s at the house?” Derek asks. His face looks like he just licked a lemon for the first time and didn’t expect it to be so sour.

“Yeah. Dude, what’s wrong? You look like you ate something bad.”

Well, at least he can still properly glare at Stiles. “Shut up,” he automatically says, so Stiles just waits him out. He knows how Derek is at this point. He’s just gotta wait for Derek to decide he wants to talk. He leans back in his chair and kicks his feet up on the bed next to where Derek is sitting.

He closes his eyes, and it’s silent for so long that Stiles is half asleep when Derek finally talks. “It’s just been so long since I’ve seen her,” Derek whispers finally, and Stiles jumps, coming back to the conversation. “I’ve changed so much. I’m not the scared little boy I was last year.”

“Me and you both,” Stiles jokes with a small smile.

“It’s true, Stiles,” Derek tells him, looking at him carefully. “Neither of us are the same as we are last year. We’ve grown, matured. Whatever, but we’re different, and I’m going to have to meet Laura all over again as this new person. It’s like me and Cora now, except now I’m in Cora’s position.”

“Seriously, where was she?” Stiles mumbles half-heartedly.

Derek just smiles slightly. “She won’t tell me, but wherever she was, she was content. Perhaps not happy without her pack or family, but she was doing okay for herself.”

Stiles just stands up and flops down onto his bed, curling into one of his pillows. “Feel free to stay and chat. My ass was just hurting from the chair.”

Much to his surprise, Derek does stay. He even lies down on his side to face Stiles as he talks more. He tells Stiles stories about growing up with his two sisters. He even had a younger brother, younger than Cora, but he didn’t talk about him much. Instead, he told the stories of Cora and Laura teaming up to torture Derek, making him wear princess crowns (which Derek didn’t seem to pissed about when he is retelling the story, so that makes Stiles thinks that either Derek is A, a softy or B, likes to wear princess crowns. He secretly hopes both) and carry them around places as his queens.

“They didn’t get that there is a queen and a king,” Derek tells Stiles with a chuckle, and Stiles has never seen the man more relaxed or content. Yeah, Derek stills has a long way to go to be happy, but this right here? This is Derek stepping closer to that.

“Hey, your sisters just accept equal opportunities for everyone,” Stiles says with a smile.

Derek just nods. “Werewolves don’t exactly see genders. Just attraction, so even at a young age, none of us understood that it’s ‘supposed’ to be a man and a woman.”

Stiles just groans at that. “Why can’t humans be more like werewolves? I stand by that every single person is bi, just in different increments, you know?”

Derek is looking at Stiles intently, focusing in on something, but Stiles doesn’t know what. “And what’s your increment?”

Mouth gaping and eyes wide, Stiles doesn’t know how to answer that and can’t seem to wrap his head around that Derek just asked him about that. “I mean, I’ve always been kind of into guys. I don’t know. Never been into a girl except for Lydia, so there’s that. I guess my increments are more towards gay…?” He is blushing and he knows it, which makes this worse because it’s _Derek_. And especially since the dude’s a werewolf and can hear his heart trying to explode out of his chest, so he just clears his throat. “You should go see Laura.”

Derek just shrugs. “You said for her it’s like she never died, right?”

Stiles nods.

“Then maybe I can just avoid her for a little while longer while I figure things out,” he says softly.

Stiles just laughs. “Usually when you avoid someone, you avoid everyone. What are you still doing here?”

Derek’s eyebrow arches at that. “Want me to leave?”

Blushing again, Stiles shrugs. “I mean, I don’t want you to leave, but I wouldn’t be offended if you didn’t want to stay. Nope. I’m unoffendable. That’s not a word, but it is now. Watch out, Webster. Stiles is making up words. Legit words too.”

“Stiles?”

“Yeah?”

“Shut up and go to sleep.”

Stiles glares at Derek for that, but he sits up anyway and gets under his covers, snuggling down into the sheets. “Are you staying?” he asks.

Derek nods once. “If it’s okay with you.”

It’s Stiles’ turn to nod, closing his eyes as he does. He can feel the bed move as Derek gets out of it, and he really does try to stop the whine that escapes his mouth as Derek does.

“I’ll be right there. I’m just turning off the light,” Derek says, comfortingly. Except then Stiles hears his words.

He bolts upright in the bed, seeing the darkness. “Derek,” he calls out. “The light.” He’s hyperventilating. “The light. Derek. Please.” He can feel the panic rising. He can’t breathe. He can’t fucking do it. Because it’s dark. He can’t see anything. Why hasn’t Derek turned on the light? He can hear Stiles’ heartbeat, can probably _smell_ the panic. There’s something wet on Stiles’ face, but he’s too busy trying to convince himself to breathe. What did Lydia say? About stopping a panic attack?

Fuck if he knows. _He can’t fucking breathe_.

There’s a hand on his wrist. “Stiles, open your eyes. Stiles. The light is on. Stiles.”

He opens his eyes to see Derek right up in his face, concerned flooding his features. But he can see. He immediately puts a hand on Derek’s neck, feeling his pulse. “I’m alive, right?” he blurts out, eyes searching the room. “This is real?”

Derek nods slowly, pressing Stiles’ finger further into his pulse point on his neck. “Count the heartbeats with me, okay?” And they do. They start counting together with Stiles looking right into Derek’s eyes the entire time until finally, he can breathe.

“I’m gonna hurl,” he mumbles before running off into the bathroom. Luckily, the light is already on when he gets there, and he suspects Derek beat him to the room, but he doesn’t care because everything in his stomach is coming up.

After brushing his teeth and gurgling mouth wash, he goes back to his room, leaving the light on. His dad has come to an understanding that Stiles will leave all the lights on, so his dad – when Stiles isn’t in the room because when his dad did that, he freaked the fuck out. Not a panic attack, but he was screaming. At his dad – will turn off the lights for him.

He lands on his bed, even more exhausted than before and rolls over to see Derek still here and still staring at him. “Thanks,” he mumbles.

Derek gets onto his side again to watch Stiles more closely. He takes Stiles’ hand and puts it back on his neck. “Was that a panic attack?” he asks.

Stiles nods.

“You don’t have to answer,” Derek tells him, still looking adorably concerned. And whoa. When did Stiles start thinking of the ex-alpha as adorable? “Why did you get one?”

“Do you know how we found the nemeton?” he answers instead. Derek just kind of shrugs. “Allison, Scott, and I died. We sacrificed ourselves to find the location, and Deaton warned us that it would take a toll on us, that we would always feel that darkness. Like a scar…Derek, do you know what happens when you die?”

Derek shakes his head, and Stiles thinks that maybe Derek doesn’t want to know, but fuck it. Stiles is letting this out whether Derek wants to hear it or not.

“It’s nothing.” Stiles’ voice cracks, and he knows. The panic rises again, but he just focuses on Derek’s heartbeat. “There’s absolutely nothing. Darkness… I just. I can’t handle the dark anymore. It’s embarrassing as fuck, but I freak out if I can’t see. God forbid I ever go blind, right? Sorry you had to see that.”

Derek shakes his head. “I’m sorry you had to go through that. I should’ve known.”

“How would you have known, Derek?” Stiles demands, not letting the man take the guilt for this one. “My dad doesn’t even know. I haven’t been able to tell him how we found them yet, and he refuses to hear it from anyone else, but I just can’t tell him. It would crush him to know that even for sixteen hours, my heart wasn’t beating. Scott doesn’t even know.”

There’s something about Derek’s silence that’s actually kind of comforting. They’re both just lying in the bed, staring at each while listening to the other’s heartbeat. Well, for Stiles it’s more like feeling, but still.

With a deep breath, Stiles closes his eyes and falls asleep like that.

And for the first time, Stiles can breathe. And for the first time, he doesn’t dream.


	3. I Know It's Hard

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter won't be done for a few more days because I've got a busy week with school coming up.  
> Until then, come talk to me on tumblr!! http://calmdown-sourwolf.tumblr.com/

Stiles wakes up to an empty bed, but the sheets are still warm. He opens his eyes, looking around for Derek, not expecting the wave of panic that hits him when he can’t find him. Then he hears his phone.

**_From: Derek (8:23): Calm down, Stiles. I’m at the house visiting Laura. If you need me, text me, call me, stop by. I don’t care. Just contact me, okay?_ **

Stiles is just staring at the text, confused. The panic calms down again, but his breaths are still shallow like they usually are. He thinks about taking up Derek’s offer.

**_From: Derek (8:25): Stiles? Answer me._ **

**_To: Derek (8:25): Calm down Sourwolf. I’m good. I’m just gonna take a quick shower and meet you over there. We need to talk._ **

**_From: Derek (8:26): Ok._ **

Stiles thought he was over this. Like, super over this actually. This being the stupid crush he developed on Derek. Come on. You’d have to be blind not to notice how hot Derek Hale is. Yes, he has issues. The Grand Canyon could be filled with the amount of issues Derek Hale has.

Thinking about it, though, Stiles is getting there with his issues. He’s got quite a few of them now. Huh. Who would’ve thought dying would have such an impact on Stiles’ life?

Once he’s showered and dressed, Stiles goes downstairs, grabbing his keys and wallet as he goes. He notices the cruiser in the driveway and figures his dad is still sleeping. He runs back inside to leave his dad a note.

**_Dad_ **

**_Going to go help Scott figure out the stuff that happened yesterday. Stopping at the old Hale house. Laura is feeling nostalgic._ **

**_-S_ **

Stiles just hopes his dad thinks Laura stayed the night in the guest room. He had closed the door to make it seem like she was in there, but just sleeping.

**_To: Derek (9:17): I’m stopping at Dr. D’s first. I need to talk to him about something. You know me. Just always talking._ **

**_From: Derek (9:18): Hurry up._ **

Stiles snorts at that. He is definitely over that. No longer taking directions from Derek. Nope. Stiles is growing up now. He is not a kid anymore.

“Stiles,” Deaton greets as Stiles steps into the waiting room. The sign on the door said “Closed” but he knew better.

“Is there anyone else here?” he asks, looking around nervously. He doesn’t want to talk to Deaton, but he’s the man with the answers. Vague and cryptic answers, but answers nonetheless.

“No, it’s just you and me. How can I help you?” He waves an arm, letting Stiles into the back of the clinic.

He scratches at the back of his neck and just launches into it. “I was wondering how I’m supposed to be feeling now. You know, after the whole finding the nemeton thing. It’s just that I can’t be in the dark anymore. I can hardly breathe.” _Except when I’m with Derek apparently_ he thinks. “I have nightmares. Is this…is this normal?”

Deaton just watches in silence for a moment like he is digesting Stiles’ words. “These types of reactions are normal, but I suspected it would affect you more than Allison or Scott.”

Stiles frowns at him. Ugh. Cryptic answers. “Why me?”

“You have a spark,” the man says softly. “You may find that as you mature and age, you will find your very own place in your pack.”

“Can you vague that up for me please?” Stiles bites sarcastically then sighs. “Sorry. I’m kind of on edge. I should probably just go. I told Derek I’d meet up with him.”

“He’s back in town?” Deaton asks with an eyebrow raised.

Stiles nods. “I called him up yesterday. Thought he might want to see his dead sister after thinking she was dead for a year.”

Deaton just nods and hums in agreement, so he is obviously done talking for the day. Stiles just waves a hand in goodbye then books it because the man may be on the good side, but he’s still fucking cryptic. Seriously. It makes Stiles not want to trust him, but he knows he should because the man knows things. Things that can help, and he has helped in the past and is still helping. So he’s good.

For now.

Stiles will always keep him on the suspect list. Just like he will always have Derek on the suspect list. Probably more than once. Totally accidentally of course.

Everything is just Derek’s fault. Everyone in Beacon Hills knows that.

He parks his jeep in the preserve and stares at the house. Realistically, it hasn’t been that long since Stiles has been here, but it feels like for fucking ever. And the house still looks sad and decrepit. Stiles shudders at the thought of anyone living here. Especially Derek.

“Hello, Stiles!” Laura says, opening the door to his jeep.

“Oh, fuck, Laura,” he exclaims. “You and your brother are going to give me a heart attack one day. Can either of you handle the guilt from tearing away the best entertainment and comedic relief you have in this town?” Stiles stops. He looks down at his lap and takes as deep of a breath as he can. He can’t talk about that. Not yet. _Too soon, Stiles. Too soon_ he thinks to himself with an internal smirk.

Well, if he can’t laugh at it then he needs to soon. Because laughing at it is much better than crawling into a ball and sobbing at it.

“Stiles,” someone says, making him look up. There’s a hand on his shoulder, and he can breathe again.

“Thanks, Derek,” Stiles mumbles, embarrassed that fucking Derek is the one helping Stiles reign himself in from panic attacks. When did he and Derek get on this level? How is he even on this level with anyone that isn’t Scott?

Well, Scott is too busy being his true alpha and taking care of the pack to have to deal with Stiles’ constant state of almost-a-panic-attack.

He jumps out of the jeep, shoving his hands in his pockets after he closes the door. He leans up against Betty and looks from the two Hale siblings. “Where’s Cora?” he asks.

“She didn’t want to come back,” Derek tells him, pointedly not looking at Laura, who looks livid. “She isn’t ready to be back here. I’m not either, but.”

“But you fucking grew a pair and wanted to see your big sister,” Laura interjects and then sighs, looking over at Stiles. “No, I’m not bitter at knowing my baby sister is alive, yet she refuses to come see me.”

“Why don’t you go to her?” Stiles asks, trying to keep the peace.

Her eyes flash red for a second before going back to her normal brown. “Because this is my territory, and there are weird things happening that I have to figure out.”

“After all, _you’re the alpha_ ,” Stiles says with a smile. “Sorry. Couldn’t resist. I think it’s like the catchphrase here. Thanks for that, Derek.”

Derek just smirks slightly at that, crossing his arms over his chest, and damn. Seriously, why is that sexy?

Nope.

Stop.

Derek isn’t sexy, okay? Nope. Stiles doesn’t think that like at all. Why would he? So change of subject and stop staring at Derek. “Why am I here?” Stiles asks.

And no. Derek doesn’t look put out by that question. Come on. What is that?

“You’re the one who said we needed to talk,” Derek points out.

Oh, yeah. Stiles totally said that, didn’t he? “Well, I figured it out. No need for talking over here. Nope. I don’t need to talk to anyone actually. I could just go back into my room and just play Xbox or here’s an idea. Do my homework now that I’m not constantly under attack. Cool. So I’ll see you guys later.”

“Stiles,” Laura says before he can open the door to his jeep. He turns around to look at her. “Why don’t you stay? Or we could all go somewhere. I actually have some questions about what I missed, and obviously, you know Derek and his lack of talking. And then you obviously enjoy talking, so what do you say?”

Well, he can’t say no. He also can’t pass up the chance to be able to keep breathing normally, which only happens around Derek. _Super_. So he agrees, and obviously, he has to drive them. Does anyone ever take into consideration that Stiles has to pay for his own gas? That Stiles has no job because he doesn’t have time for one, which means no money for gas? Which means if he’s going to keep giving rides to everyone, they need to fork up the funds.

They end up in one of the very few diners in town. Somehow, Derek ends up sharing the same booth as Stiles while Laura sits across from them with a small smile like she planned this. Stiles is probably just paranoid though.

“Who all is in Scott’s pack?” Laura finally asks after they’re awkwardly silent for a while.

Stiles glances at Derek, unsure if he will be uncomfortable with this, but the man catches his eye and nods slightly, so he goes on. “Obviously myself, Isaac, Allison, Lydia, and we’re currently working on the twins. Aiden probably will because Lydia is in it, and then Ethan probably will because his brother will join. So we’re just kind of waiting them out, you know? Lydia is doing her manipulating thing to get them to join.”

“Even though they’re both alphas?” Laura asks. Obviously someone caught her up on at least that part.

“It might be troublesome,” Stiles admits and then the waitress comes to take their drink orders. Stiles and Derek both get coffee, black while Laura gets an orange juice.

“How can you guys even drink coffee? It’s disgusting.” She makes a face at it, looking down at the menu.

“I haven’t had my daily dose of coffee yet,” Stiles tells her. “You’re lucky at how well I’m currently functioning.”

“Oh, god. You get worse?” Her words are mean, but there’s a glint in her eyes like she’s teasing, and Stiles can totally get down with the teasing.

“Anyway. The twins were in a pack before as alphas with alphas. I think they might be able to survive being in a pack again.” Stiles looks at his menu now, trying to figure what he wants, and he can never decide, so he asks Derek, “What are you getting, big guy?”

Laura’s head shoots up, looking between the two of them with a frown. “Okay, seriously, Derek? You tell me all about the alpha pack and Jackson as the kanima, but you fail to mention you have a boyfriend now?”

Derek’s eyes widen at that as he looks from Laura to Stiles, who is blushing by the way, and back. “I…um…”

“We’re not dating,” Stiles finally sputters out. Then swallows nervously. Fuck. He doesn’t need this on top of everything else. “We’re barely even friends, and that took a lot of life saving on either end to actually result in that.”

Derek is still no help. Just staring and doing a great impersonation of a fish out of water, and how is that even adorable? Fuck Stiles’ life, man.

“Anyway,” Stiles announces loudly. “Moving on. Derek, food. What are you going to eat?”

He blatantly ignores Laura’s face as Derek talks. “Um, probably this.” He points at the menu, so Stiles leans closer to see what it is.

“Of course,” he snorts, still looking at the picture. “Egg-white omelet with fresh spinach, turkey bacon, and Swiss cheese. I’m not surprised…actually, that sounds really good. Never mind. Retracting the teasing.”

He finally leans back into his own space, looking up Laura, who is just staring between the two as she sips at her orange juice. “Can I help you?” he asks.

“You two are idiots,” she mumbles before moving on. “So. A true alpha? I’ve never even heard of that.”

Stiles just shrugs, his shoulder brushing Derek’s with the movement. “Leave it to Scotty to be something no one expected. Well, of course Deaton expected it. Deaton just fucking knows everything, doesn’t he? Does that freak anyone else out?”

“Why did you go see him this morning?” Derek asks him, and whoa. It’s like the first time he has really spoken to Stiles today.

“You’re not a morning person, are you?” Stiles mumbles, squinting at him. “That’s the only thing you’ve said to me today.”

“I talked to you over text,” Derek argues.

“You guys text?” Laura asks exasperated as she bangs her head on the table.

“There’s something wrong with your sister,” Stiles whispers even though he knows she can hear him.

Derek looks at his sister, eyebrow raised and shrugs. “She’s always been like this.” Then everything about his face softens up, and Stiles hasn’t actually thought about how amazing this must be for Derek. After losing his entire family, to get two sisters back in a month? Maybe the dude’s luck is finally turning around.

Probably not in the dating department because he has some really bad taste in women.

_No_ Stiles. Stop thinking of whether him dating men would fix his luck because _no_.

“Why were you there?” Derek asks again because Stiles totally forgot he asked.

Or maybe he was just avoiding the question. “I just had some questions for him,” he says nonchalantly, sipping at his coffee. It’s a fact that if you’re eating or drinking, no one expects you to talk. Which gives you time to answer the question or find a better strategy of avoiding it. “About the nemeton.”

“And what did he say?” Derek asks, and man, he’s relentless, isn’t he?

Stiles shrugs. “It was Deaton, so he said some vague shit that I’ll probably figure out as I’m about to fall asleep because that’s when I piece together the puzzle.”

Derek gets rigid at that, and was Stiles not supposed to bring that up? And _oh._

They slept together last night. Well, not like that. But they shared a bed and slept. With Stiles somewhere touching Derek to listen to his heartbeat, and damn. If that wasn’t intimate, then Stiles doesn’t know what is.

And now he can maybe see how Laura thought they were dating.

Kind of.

So he just keeps talking. “He brought up me being a spark again, which seriously. It’s not that big of a deal, right? I can cast a mountain ash circle. Big deal. No one is gonna write a comic on that. No one wants a superhero. Captain Mountain Ash. Or maybe I’ll figure out a better name, but still. Lame.”

“You have a spark?” Laura asks, jaw dropping. “Derek, why didn’t you tell me?”

Derek just shakes his head. “I didn’t know. I just knew he could make a mountain ash circle. I didn’t know what that could mean.”

“Are you your pack’s emissary?” Laura whispers, leaning across the table.

“Um, no?” Stiles says, confused and slightly scared at the wonderment in Laura’s eyes. Thank God they’re saved by the waitress.

“Have you decided on your order or do you need a few minutes?” she asks, staring mostly at Stiles, which is weird. She needs to stop that because Stiles is perpetually paranoid (fuck yeah, alliteration) and he has trust issues now.

So Stiles just goes ahead and orders for himself and Derek, scratching the back of his head afterwards from the look Laura is giving him as she says her order absentmindedly.

“Anything else?” the waitress asks, looking back at Stiles with a smile as leans across the table to get the menus, and that can’t be a comfortable or natural way of getting the menus because her chest is literally inches from Stiles’ face. Weird.

“No thanks,” he tells her with a nervous smile.

“Are you sure?” she asks, her eyes doing a once over.

“No, we’re good,” Derek snaps, making Stiles jump, but it does make the waitress walk away, so that’s good too.

“Whoa, dude. Harsh.” But Stiles doesn’t exactly care. He just stares at Derek, confused as to why he would do that.

“Obviously, you didn’t want anything she was offering,” the man answers, not looking at Stiles.

“Obviously?” Stiles echoes.

Derek gets more nervous at that and coughs slightly. “Well, yeah. I would’ve smelt it on you if you did.”

“Yeah,” Laura interjects, taking Stiles’ attention away from Derek. “Her boobs were practically in your face. We can smell arousal.”

“Fuck,” Stiles says, internally groaning. “That’s a thing you guys can smell? Shit.”

Derek still refuses to look over at Stiles, but that doesn’t stop Laura from continuing their previous conversation. “But you have a spark,” she mumbles. “How are you not the emissary?”

Stiles shrugs. “Laura, our pack is literally two weeks old. We don’t have our shit together yet. We’re just a bunch of teenagers bumbling around and somehow managing to come out in the end winning against all odds.”

“Don’t listen to him, Laura,” Derek says, entering the conversation again. “They have a lot of talented people in the pack. Isaac was my second in command. I’m sure he’ll be great for Scott.”

“I’m the second in command,” Stiles interrupts, slightly offended. “In the pack. It’s me. Not Isaac.”

Derek just looks at him with a small smile. “I’m not surprised. I just didn’t know if Scott would actually realize his truly powerful assets like I never did.”

Stiles frowns at that. What did that even mean? “Are you admitting to being a not perfect alpha?” Stiles teases instead of focusing on Derek’s words because it’s not just him, right? That was weird thing to say.

“I was the worst alpha,” Derek says.

Stiles shakes his head at that. “You could’ve been worse. Like a lot worse. And for what it counts, you truly did care about your pack.”

“But that wasn’t enough for getting two-thirds of it killed,” he mumbles darkly, eyes flashing blue.

“Hey, no.” Without a thought, Stiles is covering Derek’s hand that is resting on the table. “Don’t say stuff like that, Derek. Neither Erica nor Boyd were your fault, and shut your fucking mouth. I don’t want to hear it. I know what happened, and I know it wasn’t your fault in any way. And you know how critical I am about you. Dude, I could critique you to no end without taking a breath or even really caring about protecting your feelings because we all know I’m an asshole.”

Derek just looks from Stiles to their hands and then down, nodding slightly. “Okay,” he whispers.

“You don’t believe me.” It’s not a question. Stiles knows that it will take Derek a lot of time before he believes it. “I just want you to know that I’m still here for you, dude. You may not be pack, but you’re my friend.” He squeezes Derek’s hand, trying to show him physically (wolves are tactile creatures, Stiles knows this from mainly Isaac) that he means what he says.

The waitress shows up then with the food, and Stiles is a sucker for food, but he watches as the waitress’ eyes zero on Stiles and Derek’s hands, so he slowly takes his hand back, realizing how it looks.

He and Derek need to stop looking like a couple. It’s becoming alarming.

 

“I’m going to head back to the house and have a conversation with Cora,” Laura announces as they leave the diner, Derek paying for the food. “Derek, I would appreciate if you stay away for a couple hours to give us some privacy.”

He nods and glances at Stiles. “See you later. Text me when it’s safe to come back.”

She flashes a smile at him and then at Stiles. “Well, it was nice to have an actual conversation with you, Stiles. I think I like you.”

He laughs, thinking of all the teasing they did of Derek after they got their food. “I think I might like you, Laura. I’ll see you around. Good luck with Cora. She’s worse than Der over here.”

She laughs and then walks away with a parting wave.

“I’ll…uh. I’ll go do something,” Derek stumbles, taking a step back.

“I don’t have any plans today,” Stiles says instead of letting him go, telling himself it’s just because Derek makes it easier to breathe. He just kind of shrugs. “I mean, my dad will probably be home when we get back, but I kinda need to talk to him anyway. If you want, you can hang with me today.”

Derek thinks about it for a moment, looking like he’s debating something. Stiles wonders if he wants to know what he is debating. Maybe it’s a really good thing there aren’t mind readers. There aren’t mind readers, right? Because that would seriously suck.

“Yeah, that sounds fine,” Derek finally says, so they climb into the jeep.

Just like Stiles suspects, his dad is awake when he gets home. “Dad,” he calls out as he opens the front door, throwing his keys on the coffee table as he passes the couch. “I’m home. And Derek’s here.”

The sheriff pokes his head out of the kitchen to look at the boys suspiciously. “Isn’t that a little much, Stiles?” he asks. “Poor Derek had to spend all night with you and now you’re making him spend the day too?”

Stiles stops, heat flooding up to his face. “You saw him last night?” he squeaks out.

His dad just nods, amused as he watches Stiles’ reaction. “Went in to check on you after my shift,” he says like his dad finding a boy in his bed isn’t a big fucking deal.

“So when do you want to yell at me? Now or later?” Yeah, Stiles can play this off. Come on. Better to laugh, right?

“I’m not yelling,” his dad tells him as he goes back into the kitchen, and they’re _so_ not done with this conversation, so Stiles follows him. Derek stays behind, but Stiles doesn’t really notice because his dad isn’t yelling at him for having someone in his bed. Not only someone but an older man with the Sheriff’s underage son who was also a suspect of murder not too long ago, and yes, Stiles’ dad knows the whole story now but still. He’s taking this too well.

His dad is cooking turkey bacon – Stiles threw away all of the actual bacon – and eggs, watching his son out of the corner of his eye. “Can he hear us right now?” he asks.

“Hey, Derek. My dad is gonna say something bad, so you might want to tune out,” Stiles says in a regular voice, knowing Derek will hear it. “Okay, you’re good.”

“Last night was the first time I slept the entire night,” his dad says, surprising Stiles. “Because you slept through the entire night. I didn’t wake up to you screaming for the first time in a week, Stiles. How could I kick him out and yell at you for that? Am I happy it’s Derek Hale? No because he is much too old for you to be dating.”

“We’re not dating,” Stiles interjects exasperatedly. Seriously. People need to stop thinking they’re dating because they’re not. Derek could never even be into Stiles. Not that Stiles is into Derek.

“Well, whatever you two are doing, it’s making you happier.” His dad takes the bacon out of the frying pan and scoops it onto a plate with eggs and then looks back at his son. “Stiles, I’m not going to yell at you. He is welcome here any time, but I reserve the right to change that whenever I want.”

“Yes, sir,” Stiles says, slowly backing out of the doorway before he stops. He opens his mouth to say something, but he doesn’t. He just turns around and heads up the stairs to his room, waving Derek to come join him. “Well, he didn’t yell at me.”

Derek just nods, looking around the room like he’s see it for the first time.

“Dude, you okay? It’s just my room. We’ve been in here plenty of times before now.” Stiles will ignore the fact that it’s the first time they’ve been in here since they slept in the same bed. It’s not weird, okay. Scott and Stiles have shared a bed plenty of times, and they’re still bros. It’s not weird.

Derek sits in the desk chair, shrugging. “I’m fine. What’d your dad say? Is he mad?”

Stiles shakes his head and falls on the bed, staring up at the ceiling because it’s a lot easier than looking at the werewolf. “He’s not even a little mad. It’s weird. He just said you’re welcomed here anytime.” He clears his throat, trying not to blush at that. He also doesn’t add that his dad thinks they’re dating too.

“Are you okay, Stiles?” Derek asks, so Stiles looks up at him.

Stiles shrugs at that. “As okay as I can be right now,” he answers the question honestly for the first time in the last year.

“Do you…if you ever want to talk about it, Stiles, I’m here,” he offers.

Stiles looks at him for a moment like he’s never seen him before. He realizes that this man has saved Stiles’ ass as many times as Stiles has saved his. Still. Derek is offering Stiles a chance to talk to him. He is saying he’s here for Stiles, and that really means a lot. At least he wasn’t lying earlier when he said him and Derek were friends because they’re at the friend level now.

“Thanks, man,” Stiles says sincerely. “That means a lot actually, so thank you.”

Derek just nods because neither one of them does emotions well. Then something starts vibrating.

“Is that your phone or are you just excited to see me?” Stiles jokes with a smirk.

Derek gives him a playful glare as he check his phone. “It’s Laura. She’s done talking to Cora, so I’m gonna head back.”

Stiles tries not to look or sound disappointed when he says, “Okay. Later, dude.”

And with a wave, Derek disappears through Stiles’ door, using the front door for the first time. There at that level apparently, but Stiles isn’t really thinking about that right now because he can’t breathe again. He has to get used to it again because really, it isn’t possible to be able to spend every second of every day with a person. Especially when that person is Derek and not exactly the closest person to Stiles.

Instead of thinking more about it, Stiles just sits at his desk and starts on his homework even if it’s Saturday, Stiles is kind of behind due to starting a pack and just dealing with everything. And he doesn’t have the best coping skills. Actually, his coping skills are playing video games and procrastinating school work at all costs. Not that it hurts his grade too much because he still aces all the tests and quizzes, but whatever.

After finishing homework, he sits on the floor in front of his bed and plays video games until he literally can’t think of anything else. He just keeps playing and playing, shooting zombie Nazis in the head until his door cracks open.

Stiles looks up at his dad, who looks like he’s frowning at his son, but Stiles can’t tell because his vision is kind of blurry.

“It’s time for bed, son,” his dad tells him, still dressed in his uniform, so it must be pretty early in the morning.

He glances at the clock and nods his agreement with his dad. The door closes while Stiles shuts off the Xbox and TV before stripping off his clothes and curling into his bed. He stares at the ceiling for a few moments, trying to breathe, but it isn’t working as well as it should be. Then he just stares at his window, hoping someone will come through it, but he doubts it. Like really doubts it. It must have been a onetime thing.

Then the window does open, and Derek pulls himself into Stiles’ room, shutting the window behind him. He toes off his shoes and then notices Stiles’ stare. Neither of them say anything as Derek kneels on the bed and lies down next to the teenager, who automatically puts his hand on Derek’s neck, feeling the pulse.

He tries to match their breathing again, his eyelids suddenly feeling a thousand times heavier, so he closes his eyes and immediately succumbs to a dreamless sleep.


	4. I Don't Know Just Where You Are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I'm a lying liar who lies, here's another chapter. And pack stuff. Woo.

They’re (Scott, Stiles, Derek, and Laura) are all at the vet discussing who should be going home next when Laura starts glaring at the door. Scott narrows his eyes slightly, and Derek just tenses while Stiles tries to figure out what the fuck the door did to offend the three werewolves.

The door opens and in comes walking Peter. Oh, great. His sassy creepiness is not needed right now. Actually, it’s never needed, which is why Stiles is completely on board with Lydia’s idea to kill him. Seriously, why not? He doesn’t do any good for anyone. He’s just annoying.

“Not to alarm anyone, but someone has been in the house,” Peter announces, and his voice can’t even be bothered to show anything. It’s just monotone, kind of like he is bored. “Dare I say it smells like…” he pauses and sees Laura. “…Laura.”

“Peter,” she greets, her voice hard.

“Laura.”

“How was being an alpha?” she asks, cutting right to the chase, and Stiles can definitely respect that about a person. “Worth killing one of the last of your family?”

Peter scoffs at that, and that pisses Stiles off, so there’s no telling how angry Laura is. Stiles glances at her. She’s mad enough to have her red eyes glowing and there’s some growling going on. “Hardly,” Peter says, answering her question. “Too much responsibility…now, may I ask why Laura is alive?”

Since Laura is hardly calm enough to answer, so Scott takes the reins on this one and goes for it. It’s awkward, and Stiles finds himself inching farther away from Peter like he always does, which makes his shoulder brush against Derek’s, allowing Stiles to take a deep breath to calm down. Derek glances down at him with concern filling his features.

Whoa. Stiles is getting to the point where he can read Derek’s faces. That’s impressive since the man’s face barely changes from emotion to emotion, so the fact that Stiles can tell now? Fucking impressive. And maybe something else that Stiles is actively not going to think about.

Instead, he is watching Peter because he doesn’t trust that werewolf. Not because he’s a werewolf but because he is mentally unstable to the point where he probably should be institutionalized. Seriously. That should be a thing that Hales should do. Their uncle needs to be committed if not for his safety but for everyone in the entire world’s safety.

Stiles isn’t exactly sure why he thinks Peter, the werewolf who can barely even fight now because he doesn’t have the strength – apparently coming back from the dead takes a lot of a person – is the big, evil villain. He looks and acts like a Disney villain. Does anyone else notice that or is it just Stiles?

Once Peter is caught up, he gives an excuse of needing to pick up groceries for his villain lair and leaves.

Stiles waits until he knows Peter is out of earshot before addressing the room. “Was he not nearly as surprised as he should have been or am I imagining things again?”

“I don’t trust him,” Derek adds.

“No one trusts him,” Scott says with a roll of the eyes.

“Says the alpha who thinks everyone should trust everyone and then we all skip together in a meadow around rainbows and unicorns,” Stiles says with heavy sarcasm.

Scott’s face just hardens at that. “Things change, Stiles. You know that. And nothing is going to happen to make me ever trust Peter.”

Stiles sighs and wipes a hand across his forehead. “Whew. I was worrying about that for a second because seriously? That guy? Cannot be trusted.” Stiles can never say that enough times.

“He’s still our uncle,” Laura says with a sigh like she’s exhausted by that thought.

“That doesn’t mean he needs to be alone with you,” Stiles tells her pointedly, and everyone just looks at him confused. “Come on. She’s alive again. We all know he’s going to try and finish what he started. Last time, Derek got in the way and killed the dude, but now that Derek knows better, there is literally nothing stopping Peter this time, which is why Laura shouldn’t be left alone.”

She growls at Stiles for that, but he doesn’t take it personally because she is probably just really testy from being in the same room as the uncle who killed her for her alpha powers. That’s bound to take a toll on someone. “I’m an alpha, Stiles,” she grinds out, and Derek puts a hand on her shoulder to calm her down, and it works. Marginally. “I can take care of myself.”

“Not to question your prowess because I’m one-hundred percent certain you can take care of yourself, but he did kill you last time,” Stiles points out, so finally with a glare she agrees and as a group, they make a schedule to babysit Laura. While they do, Stiles pretends not to know why Derek offers up taking over the day shift because he and Stiles sleeping together has become a Thing. With a capital T.

But of course Deaton notices Stiles’ weird behavior of looking anywhere but at Derek during the conversation. He starts playing with the rubber gloves like he usually does and just tries to tune everything out, but he sees Deaton staring at him, so he stops and puts his hands behind his back like a reprimanded child.

Once the schedule is hammered out, everyone starts leaving. Scott claims he promised to take Isaac out to Mexican (Isaac found out he’s not second in command, and he totally threw a bitch fit. That’s why you’re not second in command, Isaac. Jeez). Laura has been looking for a job, so she can get an apartment while she and Derek restore their house.

As everyone leaves, Deaton calls out, “Stiles, Derek, can you two stay to chat for a few minutes?”

Stiles gulps and leans himself against the examination table, stopping himself from running away like he wants to. “What’s up, Doc?” he asks after everyone but Derek is gone.

The doctor holds up a finger, looking pointedly at Derek. After a few minutes, Derek nods. “Stiles, how have your nightmares been?” the doctor asks.

Derek looks at Stiles like he also wants to hear the answer. Stiles didn’t even know that Derek knew he had nightmares. Is that another thing werewolves can smell? “They’ve been better, I guess,” he mumbles.

“How much better?” Derek asks him seriously.

Stiles sighs, giving up. “They’re gone now.” He gives Derek a meaningful look, and the werewolf gets it. Totally gets it.

“Oh,” he just says.

“What changed?” Deaton asks, but Stiles knows the man totally knows. He doesn’t know how the vet knows, but he knows everything.

“Derek,” Stiles finally admits aloud. “Derek has been staying with me and when he does, they’re gone. Whenever he’s not around, I get the shortness of breath we talked about. It’s always there except when Derek is in the same room.”

Derek is just frowning at this like he’s upset that Stiles didn’t tell him this, but Stiles can barely admit this to himself let alone aloud to more than one person. Fuck.

“How often does Derek spend the night?” the doctor questions.

“Every night,” Stiles mumbles, blushing and pointedly looking away from Derek.

“Interesting,” is all the vet says before dismissing the boys.

As they leave, Stiles talks about it. “The fuck does ‘interesting’ mean? This cryptic bullshit is totally getting on my last nerve. What did he _mean_? ‘Interesting that two guys are sharing a bed’ or ‘Interesting that it’s the two of you who are you sharing a bed’ or ‘Interesting this is probably something supernatural because everything in this town is supernatural’?”

“He probably meant that it’s interesting you don’t have nightmares when I’m there.” Derek says it like it’s a fact that he already knew before Deaton said anything, and that bothers Stiles again. _How did Derek know?_

“You knew my nightmares stopped with you around? You knew about my nightmares?” Stiles asks. “Is that why you keep coming back?” This is weird. This is the first time they’ve ever talked about this, and Stiles isn’t comfortable with this. At all.

“Is there another reason I should?” Derek raises with eyebrow with the question while Stiles to quell his disappointment.

“My bed is pretty comfy,” he says with a shrug, hiding his embarrassment that he thought that Derek might actually be able to tolerate Stiles enough to like him. Maybe even enjoy his company at this point.

“Mine’s better,” Derek responds with a shrug of his own.

“Maybe we should relocate so I can prove you wrong.” And whoa. Stiles did _not_ mean to so obviously flirt with Derek because that’s what it was, wasn’t it? Stiles never flirts with anyone because he didn’t think he was good and then _that_ come outs of his mouth? This is probably the tentative relationship they had already developed.

“Maybe we should.” And _whoa_. Stiles didn’t expect that to come out of Derek’s mouth. Ever.

“Yeah,” he just says weakly. “Tonight?”

“Why not.” It’s not exactly a question in Derek’s tone.

“Can we stop by my house so I can grab some clothes and a pillow?” Stiles asks as he starts walking towards his jeep, leaning against the door to study Derek.

“I have more than one pillow, Stiles,” Derek says like he’s stupid, which _rude_.

“I have separation anxiety with my pillows,” Stiles snaps at him. “We already knew I had issues. Wanna get in the car?”

Derek glances at the jeep and shakes his head. “You know where it is. I’ll see you there.”

Then the dude is just gone, which is fine with Stiles because he needs to think shit out, but first he needs to keep his dad posted.

**_To: Sheriff Dad (16:32): Going to Derek’s tonight. We’re still not dating. Don’t eat anything I would lecture you on. Love you._ **

**_From: Sheriff Dad (16:35): You’re an idiot. Love you too son. Is this going to be reoccurring?_ **

**_To: Sheriff Dad (16:35): Idk_ **

Stiles takes a deep breath and starts up his jeep before driving home. He tries to get in and out as soon as possible, but then he stops. Why should he hurry? He’s only going to Derek’s to sleep nothing else. That’s the extent of their relationship, right?

So he takes a shower, taking his sweet time. He even indulges in Stiles Time, which he needs if he’s going to be survive Derek’s place tonight. Sure, he’s been pretty good at not popping boners around Derek, especially when the dude is gone by the time Stiles wakes up.

Which is why he doesn’t understand when he gets out of the shower and has a million texts, missed calls, and now his phone is ringing. All of it from Derek.

“Yo,” he answers into the phone.

“Where the hell are you?” Derek demands.

“Um, at my house? Was I supposed to come over ASAP?”

“Well, no, but you made it seem like you would.”

Stiles sighs. He is so fucking confused by Derek. “I decided to take a shower. Is that cool? Do I have to ask your permission? It’s not like you have any reason for caring, dude.”

“I care, Stiles,” the man says exasperated.

“Yeah, I super appreciate you not being weird about this whole thing, but let’s not pretend it’s something it’s obviously not.”

Stiles can hear Derek huff overs the phone. “Whatever. Am I feeding you tonight? Laura is having dinner over here.”

That intrigues Stiles. Well, food always does. “What are you guys having?” Stiles asks, expecting some take out place.

“Whatever I cook,” Derek grumbles. “I haven’t decided yet, but I need to know if I should cook enough for you.”

“Always,” Stiles says automatically. “I’m done dawdling, so I’ll be over there soon.” He hangs up after that, groaning. What is going on between Stiles and Derek?

And why is it Derek that helps the nightmares go away? Why not anyone else?

 

Stiles arrives at the loft and just opens the door because it’s unlocked. He thinks about giving Derek shit about it, but he’s distracted by the wonderful smells filling the air.

“Honey, I’m home,” Stiles says because it feels way too domestic and a joke was needed.

“Bed’s over there,” Derek calls out even though Stiles can’t see him except for his arm where he’s pointing at the bed.

“Oh, baby,” Stiles says as he walks to the bed. “Your dirty talks is way too much for me. Fuck yeah, keep going.” He throws his pillow on the bed, tempted to test the bed out now, but that might be weird. Well, since when has Stiles not been weird?

So he falls onto the bed on his back, testing it out and then moans. “Holy fuck,” he moans burrowing into the softest mattress he has ever had the pleasure of resting upon. It’s like a fucking cloud. And the blanket? Shit. Is it made out of angel feathers because it’s heavenly soft.

“You okay in there?” Derek calls out, walking over to the bed area and pauses when he sees Stiles trying to become one with his bed. “So…how’s proving me wrong?”

Stiles just moans into the bed. “I have decided that this is my new home. I have officially changed my address to Derek’s Bed on my license. All of my mail shall be delivered here, and I’m never leaving this bed.”

Then Stiles hears something he never expected he would ever hear ever. Derek laughs. Not just a huff of breath or a smirk. A full on laugh, which makes Stiles look up from his nesting to stare at Derek in wonder. The man is laughing with crinkles by his eyes and a hand covering his mouth like he’s trying to keep it in, but he just can’t, and it’s the most beautiful sound Stiles has ever heard.

“Dude!” Stiles practically yells, jumping out of the bed. “You can laugh!”

The man takes a few deep breaths, sobering up. “Yes, Stiles, I can laugh. Oh, good. You’re out of your new abode. Laura should be here soon.” He leans over the bed, grabbing Stiles pillow and chucks it to the floor on the side of the bed.

“Hey, respect the pillow, bro!” Stiles exclaims and then looks at Derek questioningly. “Why did you throw my pillow? Did it piss you off?”

Derek rolls his eyes, and Stiles takes the time to study him. He’s wearing jeans that aren’t practically painted on. Well, they have paint on them and they’re kind of washed out with holes. Then he’s wearing a t-shirt with _stains_ on it and a dish towel slung over his shoulder. He looks so _domestic_ and comfortable, and it pulls at something in Stiles’ heart.

“Do you want Laura to know you’re spending the night?” he asks. “That would just bring another round of her trying to prove that we’re secretly dating.”

“No, we’re just secretly sleeping with each other,” Stiles says before he realizes what he just said and then blushes. “Shit. I…fuck. That came out totally wrong.”

Derek just smirks at him, shaking his head as he walks back to the kitchen. Stiles does not admire his ass as he goes either. He doesn’t. “Your phone is ringing,” Derek yells out, which brings Stiles back to the here and now.

“Yo, Scotty,” he answers after glancing at the caller ID.

“Remember how you suggested we have pack nights?” Scott asks, and Stiles can tell the dude is asking him a favor. “You know, where we pick a place and just have a movie night sleepover? Well, if you’re not doing anything tonight, I think we should implement it.”

“Implement?” Stiles echoes. “Word of the day?”

“Shut up,” Scott automatically answers.

“Um, tonight?” he asks, really not wanting to tell his best friend and brother about the secret sharing a bed with Derek. And he really wants to sleep in Derek’s bed. Platonically, of course.

“Yeah,” Scott says enthusiastically. “We could crash at your place because you have the comfiest couch.”

Stiles coughs once. “Yeah, we could take the cushions off the couch and kind of all just sprawl out. Tell everyone to bring a blanket, and since I’m the host, I’m not buying the pizza. I’m out right now, so everyone at my house at eight? Also, I’m using host privileges to pick the movies! Kay bye, Scotty.” He hangs up before Scott can say anything else and sighs.

“So a pack sleepover?” Derek says carefully, leaning against the doorway leading to the kitchen.

Stiles takes a deep breath. Might as well enjoy it as it lasts, right? “Yeah,” he says softly, staring at the floor. “At eight. Sorry, dude.”

“Um, Derek?” a voice calls out from the doorway. “Who else is here? It smells like…oh, hey, Stiles!” Laura comes through the door, grinning at Stiles. “Why are you here?”

Stiles shrugs, taking the heat for this one. “I was bored and came to bug Derek then noticed him cooking and practically forced myself on him because I’m a whore for food.”

Derek just coughs at that. “But Stiles is leaving now.”

He frowns over at Derek because he really doesn’t want to leave, but Derek is making it sound like Stiles got bored of him and is just ditching. “Yeah, Scott just called a spur-of-the-moment pack sleepover.”

Laura smiles at that and then frowns slightly. “Um, I know that Derek and I aren’t in your pack, but do you think that maybe we could come? I think it would be nice for our packs to start bonding since we’re sharing the territory.” She leaves out the _for now_ , but Stiles hears it. “And this might be something we could all do together.”

“But I made dinner,” Derek says, immediately protesting it.

Stiles looks at him sadly and shrugs. “I guess I can talk to Scott about it, but if you guys don’t want to, then don’t.” He doesn’t exactly say it to Derek, but they all know it was aimed at him. He starts chewing on his lip as he pulls out his phone. He calls Scott and they talk it over. Scott tells him as long as they provide the food they might be able to make it work.

“Obviously you heard what he said,” Stiles says with a shrug. “So yeah.”

Derek looks from Laura to Stiles and sighs. “I always make enough to feed a small army of people, so that might be enough for four werewolves and a few humans. Will Allison be there?”

Stiles shakes his head. “Her and her dad have been working on hammering out the details of their new code and training other families to do the same. It’ll just be Isaac and Lydia, I think. She might bring Aiden. I’m not sure, though.”

Laura just beams. “This is going to be great! I need to stop by and grab some of my stuff, but I’ll meet the two of you there!” And then she’s gone.

“Fuck,” Stiles sighs, dropping his head. “I’m sorry, dude. I didn’t know, and I didn’t mean to rope you into it.”

Derek just shrugs. “You can test drive your new home another night. Plus, I kind of have to go.”

“Yeah because your alpha is making you,” Stiles points out with a laugh as he goes back to the bed to grab his pillow and backpack.

“She wouldn’t force me to,” Derek answers, looking away from Stiles. “I’m going because it’s better for you. Do you want to explain the nightmares to everyone?”

Stiles just stares at him for a moment and has another revelation. “Really? You’d do that for me?” he asks. “Like not even…I just. For me?”

Derek nods once. “Yeah, for you, Stiles. I would.” He looks like he wants to add something else to that, but he just says, “I’m going go to go finish dinner and pack it away. You want to help?”

Stiles nods and follows him into the kitchen. Of course, it’s pasta. That’s how Derek makes too much because there is no way to make pasta without making too much. Stiles digs through the cabinets, finding all of the tupperware without commenting that _Derek has tupperware_.

They pack everything away and start to head out before Stiles stops Derek. “One, you might want to change into, you know, pajamas. Two, you heard my conditions to pack sleepover night. Bring your own blanket.”

Derek rolls his eyes before pulling off his shirt, and Stiles immediately turns away.

Fucking _jerk_.

Stiles doesn’t look until he hears the blanket being taken from the bed. Derek bunches it up, grabs his portion of the spaghetti, and they leave the apartment. Stiles drives them back to his place. “Hey, can you text Laura and tell her about the blanket rule?” he says, which is the first words spoken in the jeep.

Derek just grunts and pulls out his phone. They get to the house, and Stiles jumps out before texting his dad about the sleepover, figuring it might be better if the Sheriff is forewarned that there are a bunch of teenagers sleeping in his living room.

With Derek’s help, he starts pulling off the couch cushions and laying them on the floor. Stiles goes upstairs and pulls out the extra sheets, draping them over the cushions to make them softer. He smiles down at their work into a makeshift bed then frowns.

“I’m guessing you and Laura probably don’t want to share a bed with our pack,” he mumbles, frowning.

Then the front door opens with Scott and Isaac holding two pizzas each. “We figured we would eat them anyway,” Scott says with a nod then acknowledges Derek. “Hey.”

Derek nods at him, but Isaac and Derek both ignore each other. Stiles inwardly sighs. That will be fun to deal with later. Stiles explains their current dilemma, so Scott and Isaac run up the stairs and bring down Stiles’ mattress.

“Oh, hey! Great idea!” Stiles says with a huge smile. “You and Laura can share my bed.”

Derek just nods as the two boys place the mattress next to the makeshift bed. Then they distribute Stiles’ pillows among the two beds while Stiles goes upstairs to change into his pajamas to match everyone else.

When he comes downstairs, it’s a party. Laura is there, being introduced to Lydia, Aiden, and Isaac. This is biggest amount of people that have ever been in the Stilinski household at one time.

“Stiles,” Lydia calls out, so Stiles walks to her. “I haven’t heard from you in, like, a week. That is unacceptable. I’ve been worried about you.”

Stiles just gives her a smile and wraps his arms around her, kissing her cheek. After them actually kissing, the cheek-kissing is not a big deal and is almost natural. “I’m fine, Lyds,” he says softly, and for once, he doesn’t actually sound like he’s lying. He obviously doesn’t mean it. He won’t mean it for a while, but it’s getting good enough that he can lie better about it.

He smiles down at her in her silky pajama shorts and spaghetti strap that matches. Of course, she has matching pajamas. But her hair is pulled back, and it’s the first time he’s ever seen her without makeup. Obviously, she’s still gorgeous.

“Let go of my girl, Stilinski,” Aiden says in a hard voice, flashing his red eyes.

He jumps back from Lydia with a smile. “No harm, no foul, bro. Plus, my house, my rules. And we’re a pack, Aiden. What do you expect?”

He just flashes his eyes again, and there’s a growl from across the room. Stiles spins around to see who it is, and sees Derek looking at the ground. Well, looking may not describe that perfectly well. He’s glaring at the ground like it’s…like it’s Kate.

Aiden doesn’t seem to notice that, though, so Stiles just slips away and puts a hand on Derek’s shoulder. “All good?” he asks under his breath so that only the wolves that are paying attention – Laura and Isaac – can hear what he’s saying

Under his touch, he can feel Derek relax with a sigh. Then the man nods before Stiles slips his hand off.

Since everyone is there and accounted for, they all sit in their respected beds and start dishing out containers of spaghetti – Stiles had found plastic forks in the pantry that he has no idea where they’re from – and pizza boxes. Scott is on one end of the makeshift bed with Isaac next to him then Aiden, who doesn’t look as uncomfortable as a non-packmate should, then Lydia with Stiles on the end.

They turn on Star Wars (starting from A New Hope obviously) because that’s what Stiles chose because fuck everyone. It’s his house, his rules damnit. Everyone is talking during the movie except for Stiles, who is actually trying to pay attention to his favorite movie series. He shoots glares at Scott because he still hasn’t seen the movies and there he is _ignoring the movie and talking to Isaac_.

Stiles just huffs, narrowing his eyes at the movie. At some point, Laura squeezes herself between Lydia and Stiles because of course, Lydia and Laura become insta-BFFs. Stiles gets pushed off the bed, so he goes and sits next to Derek instead, still glaring at the screen.

Derek touches his arm with an eyebrow raised. “You okay?” he asks quietly.

Stiles nods once. “It’s nothing,” he says and knows Derek can tell he’s lying. So when he opens his mouth to say something else, Stiles puts his hand over it. “Not right now, okay? I’m trying to watch my favorite movie.”

“Your favorite movie is Star Wars?” Derek asks.

Stiles nods.

“Which one?”

Stiles shrugs. “I love all of them for different reasons, so I don’t exactly have one. Have you seen them?”

Derek snorts at that. “Of course I’ve seen them. Everyone should watch Star Wars at least once in their life.”

Stiles’ eyes practically bug out of his head. “Scott!” he exclaims. “Did you hear that? Everyone should watch Star Wars at least once in their life!”

“I’m watching it right now, Stiles!” Scott calls from the other side of the room.

Stiles just glares at him and just sulks down into his bed. “Stupid lying best friend who lies all the time,” he mutters under his breath, which makes Derek laugh because apparently he was the only one listening to Stiles.

But that laugh does amazing things to Stiles, so he just smiles up at the werewolf and nudges against his shoulder. Derek smiles back at him softly.

About halfway through the third movie, people start falling asleep. First one out is Isaac, then Aiden and Lydia soon follows him.

“Laura,” Stiles says softly. “We might need to trade places now. Lydia likes to cuddle. She will never admit it and don’t ever tell anyone, but she’s a cuddler.”

Laura laughs once and carefully gets off the couch cushions while Stiles climbs ungracefully over Derek. He trips only to have Derek catch his hips, holding him in place as he stands over Derek. To keep himself from falling, his hands land on Derek’s shoulders, and he just stares down at the man, trying not to imagine different reasons for his hands to be on Stiles’ hips.

He jumps down from the bed and lays himself down on the couch cushions as Laura lies down on his bed. “’Night Scott, Laura, Derek,” Stiles mumbles, closing his eyes.

There is a chorus of “’Night” from Scott and Laura and then a softer, “Goodnight, Stiles,” from Derek.

 

In the middle of the night, Stiles shoots up, gasping. Scott. Where’s Scott? He looks around and sees Scott sleeping at the end of the bed, so he lets out a relieved sigh before freaking out again. Derek. What about Derek? He just watched the man die.

A soft voice says, “Stiles,” so his head snaps that way to see Derek lying in Stiles’ bed, watching Stiles carefully. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”

Stiles falls back down and rubs a hand over his face, noticing how wet his eyes are. Fuck. “I…in my dream,” he whispers, knowing Derek will hear him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Derek asks.

Stiles shakes his head and reaches his hand out. “I need your wrist. Please.”

Without any questions, Derek places his wrist in Stiles’ hand, so the teenagers concentrates on the pulse again. All of the tension leaks out his body as he listens to the steady beat of Derek’s heart.

“Thank you,” he whispers, not knowing if Derek is still awake or not.

“Always,” Derek says back.

“You died in my dream,” Stiles finally explains. “You and Scott and my dad.” That has him freaking out again. “Is my dad home?”

“Yes, he’s home,” Derek says softly. “I can hear his heartbeat upstairs. He’s sleeping.”

Stiles relaxes again, closing his eyes as he feels Lydia curling up next to him, her arm resting against Stiles’ back. With the steady sound of Derek’s pulse and the closeness of his pack, Stiles begins to drift into a peaceful sleep.

 

 

“Stiles, why does your bed smell like Derek?” Scott asks as they clean up the living room. Everyone left this morning, so luckily, this conversation is just the two of them.

“Because he slept in it last night?” Stiles says, shrugging as he gathers up the sheets from the cushions and the sheets from his bed before throwing them all into the wash.

Scott just shakes his head as he throws the cushions on the couch. “Stiles, it smells like him like a _lot_ like Derek. Like Derek has been sleeping in your bed for the last week.”

Stiles gulps and then flops onto the couch, burying his face into his hands. He can’t lie to Scott about this. Not to his best friend, brother, and alpha.

He feels the couch dip next to him as Scott sits down, putting his arm on Stiles’ shoulder. “What’s going on between you and Derek?”

“I have no idea,” Stiles says, his voice cracking. He wants to cry about it, and he can barely breathe because Derek isn’t here. He shoves his fingers into his eyes and rubs, sighing. “I can hardly breathe all the time, Scott.”

“Are you okay?” Scott asks immediately.

Stiles shakes his head and then leans back against the couch, staring up at the ceiling. “I’m not okay. The only time I’m even a little bit okay is when Derek is the same room, and it’s fucking stupid having to rely on him like that. I can’t breathe unless we’re in the same room. I can’t sleep unless I can feel his pulse.”

Scott pulls a face. “Do you like nuzzle into his neck and snuggle with him every night?”

Stiles groans. “Ugh no, Scott. Last night, I held his wrist. Usually, I just rest my hand on his neck and just count the beats until I fall asleep. If he isn’t there, I have nasty nightmares. Last night, I dreamt about you and my dad dying.”

“But Derek was there last night?” Scott is frowning out of confusion. “Is that why he and Laura were there last night?”

Stiles shrugs. “It’s why Derek was there. Laura came because she wants to bring our packs together and get along.”

“So Derek knows all of this?” Scott questions.

Stiles nods. “So does Deaton because Deaton knows fucking everything, but I don’t, Scott. I have no idea what’s going on. Because you know what? Derek’s actually a good guy. His laugh is just amazing. That spaghetti last night? He made that. I almost proposed to him then and there. And he’s been amazingly nice through this whole thing.”

Scott just squeezes his best friend’s shoulder and sighs. “You like him, don’t you?”

Another nod and then he drops his forehead on Scott’s shoulder. “I hate this because it’s obvious he will never feel this way about me, and it’s like Lydia all over again.”

Scott doesn’t say anything. He just sits there, letting Stiles calm down his breathing to the normal short breaths. “I don’t think it’s like Lydia,” Scott says softly.

Stiles frowns and sits back up, glancing at the clock. “It’s time for your shift with Laura.”

Scott frowns at the clock and stands up. “Thanks for letting us use your house last night. We should make it a weekly thing. Lydia said we can use her place next.”

Stiles just nods and then watches Scott leave the house. He groans and face plants on the couch. That’s the first time he ever admitted his feelings for Derek out loud, and it wasn’t as freeing as people make it sound. It feels worse because now the feelings are even more real. No takebacks.

What is he going to do now?

**_From: Derek (11:56): Your place or mine tonight?_ **

Stiles just stares at the texts and groans again.

Yup. He’s fucked.


	5. A Reap You'll Never Sow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning. There is a panic attack in this chapter. So yeah. Heed my warning.

“Honey, I’m home,” Stiles calls out from the front door.

Derek looks up from his book and glares. “Stop saying that every time you enter my apartment.”

Stiles just grins at him and then flops onto the couch next to Derek and grabs his book, placing his thumb on the page that Derek is on. “Whatcha reading?” he asks, frowning as he reads the cover. “Really? A mystery novel? Is there not enough mystery here for you?”

Derek just shrugs. “Cora is coming back.”

“Really?” Stiles beams at that, imagining how happy Derek should be about that. “That must be great for you to have your both your sisters here.”

Derek’s lips twitch as he fights to keep the smile off his face, and it makes Stiles want to kiss him. “She should be here tomorrow.”

“Why didn’t she want to come back?” Stiles asks, thinking that if his mom came back to life in fucking Antarctica, he’d take the next plane out there without a thought.

“Too much has happened here. I didn’t even want to come back, but Laura is worth it. Plus, Beacon Hills is our home.”

Stiles smiles softly. “Home is where the heart is,” he sing-songs.

Derek just mumbles, “Yeah.”

Stiles doesn’t know what to say anymore, so he just yawns and then says, “It’s getting late.”

Derek stands up and starts walking towards his bed, stripping his shirt off as he goes. Stiles just can’t look away as the man throws his shirt, not even paying attention to the throw, but the shirt sails into the hamper anyway.

“I hate you,” Stiles states as he stands up, following Derek to the bed.

“Why?” Derek asks, turning around with a frown like he thinks Stiles actually meant it.

So Stiles laughs and steps up to Derek, putting a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t hate you, Derek,” he says softly. “It was joke because your shirt landed in the hamper perfectly without you trying. If it were me, it probably would’ve ended up on the couch, and I would’ve fallen on my face.”

Derek shakes his head softly with a smile. “I’d catch you before you hit the ground.”

Stiles’ heart skips at that, and he removes his hand so he doesn’t do something stupid and grab Derek’s face and kiss the crap out of him. “I’ve missed my new home,” Stiles says instead and just jumps onto the bed, rolling onto his stomach, sprawling out in the middle of the bed.

Derek laughs once and lies down on the edge of the bed, staring at Stiles. “You gonna scoot over?” he asks, nudging Stiles’ side.

Stiles squirms. “Stop,” he says and rolls over.

Derek just looks at him like he’s planning something. “You’re ticklish?” His fingers press into both of Stiles’ sides again and Stiles giggles and it’s totally manly, okay? Totally manly as he squirms from Derek’s fingers constant pressure on his tickle spot.

“Stop, Derek!” Stiles shouts, his voice higher than normal as he tries to roll away from the tickling hands.

Derek laughs, following him and then they both stop. Stiles stares up at Derek, who is just hovering over him. Stiles’ breath shortens for a different reason than constant panic. He’s trying not to think about how close Derek is and how Derek won’t look away from his mouth.

“Derek,” Stiles whispers, hoping it will take him out of his thoughts, but the man isn’t moving. Not that he really wants Derek to move from this position. Without thinking about it and without his expressed permission, Stiles’ fingers run down Derek’s bicep and his eyes follow the path up and down the man’s arm. The skin is softer than he thought it would be, and Stiles licks at his lips nervously.

That seems to bring Derek away from his thoughts. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and pushes himself onto his back. “Sorry,” he mumbles, rolling over onto his side so he’s not facing Stiles.

“It’s okay,” Stiles says. “It’s not like I minded it. Like at all.”

Derek just huffs that, and Stiles glares at his bare back. “I’m sorry that my presence offends you,” Stiles snaps at him. “I know you wish there was some psychotic bitch in your bed instead of me.”

Derek sits up at that, glaring down at Stiles. “Really, Stiles?” he asks. “You’re going to yell at me about that again? I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry that I have horrible taste in women and have the worst luck in relationships. I’m sorry I choose people that aren’t the best for me.”

Stiles sits up because this isn’t exactly a conversation to have lying down. “Yeah because maybe if you chose people who were actually decent people, you might have a chance at being happy.”

“I don’t deserve to be happy,” Derek mumbles.

Stiles frowns at him, grabbing at Derek’s face to make him look at Stiles’ face. “You deserve to be happy, Derek. That is the most bullshit thing I have ever heard.”

“I got my entire family killed,” Derek says loudly, almost yelling. “I don’t deserve happiness. I don’t deserve you.”

Stiles flinches at that, taking his hand back. “Don’t deserve _me_?” he repeats, his heart pounding. “Derek…you know what that doesn’t matter right now. You didn’t get your entire family killed. Kate would’ve found a way to kill them with or without you. Do you understand that? She had a goal in her mind, and she was going to accomplish it one way or another. You may have made it easier, but you were a fifteen year old, who thought he was in love. You can’t blame yourself. Ask Laura. Ask Cora. I bet you my life neither of them blame you.”

Derek just looks down at his bed, his breathing uneven, and Stiles thinks he might be crying. Oh, shit. “I don’t deserve you, Stiles,” he whispers brokenly.

“I don’t even know what that means,” Stiles says with a laugh that has no humor in it whatsoever. “It’s not like you want to deserve me. Why would you?”

Derek’s head snaps up at that, eyes wide. “You’re an idiot.”

“Wow, thanks, asshole,” Stiles snaps, glaring at the werewolf. “I’m sorry that after actually getting to know you, I started actually _caring_ and _liking_ you and _developing feelings_ for you.”

Derek frowns at him. “You have feelings for me?”

Stiles shrugs, looking away from him because he can’t face this conversation. The rejection. Not from someone he legit depends on. “Yeah, but don’t make it weird.”

“Why would it be weird?” Derek actually sounds confused.

“Because you’re rejecting me,” Stiles exclaims, turning back to the werewolf and wow, he wasn’t planning on this happening tonight. “Because you don’t want me the way I want you, and that’s fine, okay? You don’t have like me back. I’m a pathetic teenager anyway, who has to depend on someone just so he doesn’t have nightmares. I’m just pathetic.” Stiles knows he’s right. No one could ever want him. He has attention problems, he talks way too much, and when he’s interested in something, he fixates on it until there is nothing else in the world.

Stiles can feel his heart pounding, and no matter how much air he gives his lungs, it doesn’t work. He just keeps sucking in the air and nope. His lungs don’t want that. He closes his eyes and tries to hold it all in. Seriously? Having a panic attack in front of Derek? Again? After being rejected by the dude? Stiles is definitely pathetic.

“Stiles!” Derek is yelling now, and that’s weird.

“Stiles!” someone else calls out. Laura? When did Laura get here? “Derek, do something. He’s going to suffocate himself.”

“Stiles, come on. Calm down.” He grabs Stiles’ hand and puts it on his neck again. “Count with me. Ready? One. Two. Three.”

It freaks Stiles out more because no. “I’m…No. Derek.” Stiles is trying to talk and it’s not working very well. Apparently you need oxygen to talk. “You’re. Rejecting. Me. Stop. I don’t. Need. You.”

“I’m not rejecting you, Stiles!” Derek shouts at him.

Stiles’ eyes flash open, and he stares at the man confused, but at least now he can breathe. And whoa. “I’m pathetic,” he says softly, burying his face in his hands and just sobs. All he can think about is how pathetic he is. That and the panic. All of the panic because of the monster of the week. His dad. Scott. Derek. All he can see is different ways they’re dying.

Stiles can feel himself being moved and can feel skin against his cheek. He clings to whoever is holding him, trying to match his breathing to theirs. Finally, he opens his eyes and notices his face in plastered to a bare chest. Derek’s bare chest. He really wants to move, but Stiles is way too weak to pull away and run, so he just looks up at Derek.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, his voice raspy from crying.

“There is nothing for you to be sorry about,” Derek tells him, his hazel eyes full of something Stiles can’t name.

He opens his mouth to talk, but then there is a cup of water, and oh, yeah. Laura’s here. He takes the glass from Laura and chugs most of the water down before setting it down. He starts controlling his breaths again, pulling from Derek, but the man won’t let him go. “I’m good now, Derek,” he tells him. “You don’t have to keep holding on.”

Derek frowns at him and lets him go then looks down. Neither of them are looking at each other because the blanket on Derek’s bed suddenly got really interesting. Super interested actually. So much better than confronting the awkward problem that’s hanging in the air.

“Oh, my _god_!” Laura yells, making them both look up at her. “You two are complete idiots. Use your fucking words.”

“Why are you here?” Stiles asks her, sipping at the water again. “Oh, thanks for the water by the way.”

“I’m here because I had to talk to Derek then I found you having a panic attack in _Derek’s bed_. Not dating my ass.” She crosses her arms over her chest, looking pissed.

“We’re not dating,” Stiles says sadly.

“But you want to be,” she points out like it’s fucking obvious, and okay, Stiles isn’t actually super subtle.

“Yeah, but that’s just me,” he says with a shrug, putting the glass on the nightstand after he finishes it.

“ _Derek_ ,” Laura growls at her brother, and he looks up at her sheepishly. “Tell him. Please. Or I’m going to punch you for him.”

He sighs and rolls his eyes. “It’snotjustyou,” Derek says really quickly.

“What?” Stiles asks, cocking an eyebrow. “I didn’t catch any of that buddy.”

The look Laura gives him could freeze fire, and it is kind of really frightening. Okay, note to Stiles, never piss off Laura.

“It’s not just you,” Derek says slower while glaring back at Laura.

“You want to date me?” Stiles asks incredulously. “Yeah, I don’t think so, dude. I’m not gonna take a pity date from you. I’m not that pathetic.”

“You’re both idiots,” Laura mumbles, putting a hand on her forehead and looking like she is 1000% done with the both of them. “You deserve each other.” She stands up straight and walks over and grabs Stiles’ chin. “Stiles, listen to me, okay? Derek has the biggest crush on you. He even fucking pines, Stiles. It’s sad. You also have the biggest crush on him, and you have panic attacks about it. I feel like it there is a super easy solution to this.”

Stiles rips his chin away from her, narrowing his eyes at her. “Okay, sure. Yeah, let’s just two of the most fucked up guys in Beacon Hills in a relationship together. That will end fantastically, Laura. We’re both highly self-conscious, and I’m pretty sure we both hate ourselves. That is not the beginning to a healthy relationship.”

Derek is just staring at him like he’s trying to figure something out. “We can help each other,” he offers. “I’m not saying we jump right into this, but we can help each other be…less fucked up? Functioning people?”

“That is the most romantic dating proposal I’ve ever received,” Stiles says because sarcasm is his best defense, and he has no idea what to say.

Derek glares at him for that, but it’s not as heated as it usually is, which that might be a step in the right direction.

Stiles sighs. “Fine. We’ll go at this glacially slow, okay? So slow that no one else will know about it. Right, Laura?”

The boys look at her, and her eyes widen as she mimes zipping her lips and locking them with a key, throwing the “key” over her shoulder. “So,” she says with a small smile. “Are you two going to stop being so angsty because I just couldn’t bare it anymore.”

“ _Go home, Laura_ ,” Derek tells her in a very annoyed tone. A tone that he only used with Stiles, so Stiles is guessing it’s a tone reserved for people who Derek cares about. There’s something to think about.

“Wait. I have a question!” she says, bouncing up and down almost with a smile. “Cora. She’s coming, right?”

Derek can’t help but smile, and it makes Stiles smile seeing Derek so happy and with his family. He deserves it. He may not think he does, but he _so_ does. “Yeah, she’ll be here. She said she’d go to the house and text us when she gets there.”

Laura beams and then nods as she back towards the door. “Well, see you all tomorrow. Stiles, always a pleasure.”

He waves at her and says, “I assure you, the pleasure is all yours, Laura.”

She laughs at that before disappearing through the door. Stiles face plants into a pillow, kicking around until he is under the covers before he peeks up at Derek, who is just watching him with an amused smirk.

“Can I help you?” Stiles asks.

“That’s the point, right?” Derek replies.

Stiles laughs and rolls his eyes as he gets onto his side. “Did you just make a joke?” he asks.

Derek nods and then lies down next to Stiles. “I make those sometimes, but only when I’m in a good mood.”

“Basically only when you’re around me,” Stiles tells him with a wink. And there’s that laugh again. Ugh. Stiles could listen to that laugh for the rest of his life. “So…are we dating? What are we now?”

Derek shrugs and hesitantly wraps an arm around Stiles’ waist. “Is this okay?”

Stiles nods and even curls up closer. “Are you my _boyfriend_?” Stiles says like he’s twelve. “Can we like hold hands in the hallways? Are you going to pass me love notes in English?”

“And that’s it. Relationship over,” Derek deadpans.

“You think I’m cute,” Stiles says with a smile as he closes his eyes, feeling somewhat accomplished.

A hand runs down his spine, making Stiles shiver in delight as the arm tightens around him. “Yeah, Stiles. I think you’re cute.”

“Good because you’re pretty good lookin’ yourself.”

Stiles can _see_ the eye roll Derek is totally doing right now with his eyes closed, but he starts counting Derek’s breaths, sleep coming quickly now. There are murmured “Goodnight”s before Stiles drifts off to sleep.

 

Stiles wakes up with a heavy weight almost crushing him except it isn’t all that bad. It’s actually kind of really nice once Stiles realizes that the weight belongs to Derek. He wraps an arm around the man, his fingers tracing over his tattoo. It’s surprising that Stiles is awake before him because Derek is always awake first. Stiles suspects that once the sun rises, so does Derek.

“Derek,” Stiles whispers against his ear, carding his fingers through his hair. “Come on, buddy. Wake up.”

The werewolf grunts and then nuzzles his bearded face on Stiles’ chest, which makes the teenager squirm. “Why are we waking up?” he grumbles as he stretches out, and that does amazing things for his back. Whoa.

“We have stuff to do today,” Stiles answers calmly as he runs his hand down Derek’s back. “I’m going to Deaton today.”

“What for?” Derek asks, looking up at Stiles through his eyelashes.

“To talk about not needing you around twenty-four/seven,” Stiles tells him. “Not that I don’t want to, but I don’t want to be entirely dependent on you, Derek.”

He frowns and nods. “I understand that.”

“Good. I mean, I might still use it as an excuse with my dad so he’ll let you stay in my bed.” Stiles winks down at Derek as he laughs.

“I’m not going to cross the Sheriff,” Derek tells him and finally sits up, stretching again. “I’m going to need to be on his good side.”

Stiles shrugs. “You stopped my nightmares. You’re pretty high up on his Good Side List.”

Derek smiles slightly at that before standing up to go to the bathroom. Stiles just stays in the heavenly bed, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about his life. He doesn’t think about what will happen when he leaves this bed or the fact that real life is just outside the door. Literally. No, for now, he is thinking about the way Derek’s ass looks in sweats because _damn_.

After Derek walks out of the bathroom, Stiles decides to get up. On the way to the bathroom, he grabs his toothbrush from his backpack before walking beside Derek, their shoulders brushing as they pass each other. Stiles tries not to smile at the contact, but it’s fair game once he’s in the bathroom and beaming at himself in the mirror. He takes care of business and brushes his teeth before leaving the bathroom.

But he doesn’t do anything productive. Nope, he just jumps back onto the bed, lying down on his back and staring back up at the ceiling until there’s someone else in the bed with their head on his chest again.

“I thought you were going to Deaton’s?” Derek asks with a smile in his voice.

“Your bed is just _really_ comfortable, okay?” But Stiles is smiling too as his fingers brush through Derek’s hair again.

The man hums in contentment at the feeling, so they just sit there in silence for a while until Derek breaks the silence. “Why did Laura come back?” he asks in a whisper.

“I haven’t figured that out yet,” Stiles mumbles as he tries to think through it _again_.

“But why her? Why not her and Erica and Boyd?” Derek continues, his voice stable, but his eyes are closed, and his face is becoming vulnerable. Stiles’ heart aches at that, wanting to fix the hurt.

“I don’t know,” Stiles whispers. “What would you do if they had come back?”

Derek just buries his face into Stiles’ chest at that question and mumbles something, but Stiles can’t understand it, so he pokes at Derek’s side until the man looks up and repeats what he said. “I would apologize to them for failing them as an alpha and killing them.”

Stiles figured it would be along those lines. He reaches down and grabs Derek’s chin in his hand, making the werewolf look at him. “Derek, you can’t blame yourself for them. The alphas killed Erica and Boyd. You didn’t.”

Derek sighs, looking away from the teenager. “It was my claws that killed Boyd, my stupidity that prevented from us finding Erica in time.”

Stiles just groans. “I don’t want to hear it. One day, I will prove it to you, but today is not that day.” He pushes Derek off of him and jumps out of the bed, looking around the place with a frown. “You seriously need a new place.”

“It’s not a dump,” Derek says like they’ve had this argument a thousand times, which they kind of have. “There’s nothing wrong with living here.”

“Yes, there is,” Stiles argues, gesturing around the place. “There are too many bad memories in this place. You need to start fresh. Some place with no horrible memories.”

“Well that basically eliminates all of Beacon Hills, doesn’t it, Stiles?” Derek snaps back, standing up from his bed. “If we’re going with that mind frame, we need to get rid of my bed too.”

Stiles winces at that thought. He didn’t even think about Jennifer and Derek sleeping – actually _sleeping_ together as in having sex, fucking, having sexual intercourse – together in that bed. The bed that Stiles and Derek sleep together – and actually just _sleeping_ and maybe some cuddling. Stiles doesn’t like that thought, and for a moment, he actually thinks about trashing the bed along with the loft, but that’s going overboard.

“It’s not like someone died in that bed,” Stiles points out.

“Are you going to make this argument when I move back into my home?” Derek asks. “Is this what it’s like being your boyfriend? You controlling my life?”

That pisses Stiles off, and now, he’s just done. “You know what, Derek? I don’t give a fuck what you do. I need to go see Deaton.” He stomps to his back and starts stripping off his clothes before pulling on jeans and a clean t-shirt. He pulls his backpack over his shoulder and glares over at Derek. “Don’t you dare come tonight,” he says in a hard voice. “That’s the last thing in your life I’ll try to control. Don’t worry. The control freak is out of your life now.”

Derek sighs, shaking his head. “I didn’t call you a control freak.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Stiles grumbles as he just walks out the door. After the door closes behind him, he closes his eyes with a sigh and leans against the door, sliding down until he is sitting on the floor, legs splayed out. He runs a hand through his hair and takes a deep breath.

Then the door opens, and Stiles is falling backwards, crashing onto floor with his back as he stares up at Derek. “Well, first fight,” Stiles says, laughing once. “I think we did a pretty decent job at it, considering we’ve been fighting for years.”

Derek just looks down at him, a corner of his mouth twitching up. “I’ve been thinking about moving out for a while,” he admits, holding a hand out to help Stiles up.

Once the teenager is upright again, he leans against the door frame. “Where are you thinking of moving to?” he asks.

Derek shrugs. “I was thinking about seeing if Laura wanted to share a place until the house is finished.”

Stiles bobs his head, sticking his hands into his pockets. “Which means we will be constantly harassed by the only person who knows about us. That’ll be fun.”

Derek huffs out a laugh and nods. “Are you staying or going?” he asks.

“I don’t know,” Stiles admits with a laugh. “I should actually probably wait until the vet office closes, which is at four.” Then Stiles checks his watch then shrugs. “If you make me breakfast, I might be persuaded to stay.”

Derek just grabs Stiles’ wrist and pulls him back into the apartment where Derek goes straight into the kitchen to start breakfast. Stiles sits back on the bed, pulling out his laptop to look up apartment listings in the area. He even texts Laura about it.

**_From: Big Scary Alpha (9:13): Why are you asking about my apartment hunting? No, you cannot move in with me._ **

**_To: Big Scary Alpha (9:13): Well thx for the offer, but I wasn’t asking for me. Derek needs to move out of this place. Maybe you two should live together? I wanted to know what you had found because I’m apartment hunting for D._ **

**_From: Big Scary Alpha (9:14): You’re apartment hunting? For Derek?_ **

**_(9:14): Seriously?_ **

**_(9:15): Which of you came up with that bright idea._ **

**_(9:15): You two are seriously idiots. I can’t with the two of you._ **

**_(9:15): Idiots._ **

“Hey, Der?” Stiles calls out in a normal voice, looking up from his phone. “Are we idiots?”

The man comes in, holding two plates that Stiles can’t tell what is on them yet, but it smells amazing. He sets one in front of Stiles and then sits in front of him, raising an eyebrow. “Probably,” he says.

Stiles frowns before picking up his plate and shoveling French toast in his mouth and then moaning. “Will you marry me?” he says over a mouth full of food. “This is amazing.” Then he swallows it and continues with the previous conversation. “Your sister is calling us idiots because we’re apartment hunting.”

Derek pulls out his phone and frowns at the screen. “She thinks we’re nesting,” he says confused. “Does she realize that you’re not moving in with us?”

“I told her it was going to be the two of you,” Stiles says before forking more food into his mouth. And there’s even bacon. Seriously. Stiles could get used to eating such great food. “But if you keep cooking like this, I may be tempted to move in with you.”

Derek shrugs. “You’ll probably be sleeping there most of the time anyway,” he mumbles as he shoves food into his mouth.

Then Stiles is frowning again. “Oh, my god. We _are_ idiots. Remember, Derek? Glacially slow. _Glacial_.”

Derek rolls his eyes, but he doesn’t argue with Stiles, so that’s good. They spend the rest of the day avoiding their phones and looking through apartments online. Stiles starts sending certain links to Laura via Derek’s email that way she can put in her opinion.

Then it’s time for Derek to leave. “Cora should be coming soon,” he says softly. “I’m gonna head out. You can stay here as long as you like.”

Stiles just nods, closing out all of the apartment websites he had up and deleting his browser history. He doesn’t need his dad snooping around and finding Stiles looking at apartment because that wouldn’t be a fun conversation for anyone. “Yeah, I guess I could head over to Deaton’s now.”

They both stand up and collect their stuff. Derek just gives him a wave before leaving the apartment, and that’s when Stiles goes back to the darkness. He can feel it again, and every time he sees a shadow, he thinks it’s death.

Trying to forget about death, Stiles closes his laptop and starts packing up his stuff. Then he stops. Why should he pack up his stuff? He’s most likely coming back here after he is done at Deaton’s. Well, he hopes he is. Even if he isn’t spending the night tonight, he can swing by and grab his stuff. It won’t be a big deal. It isn’t like the Hale family hates him or anything like that. Actually, it kind of seems like Laura might like Stiles? Weird.

Stiles makes his way down to his jeep and jumps when there’s a certain Hale in his jeep that he has never wanted in his jeep. “Peter,” Stiles says, trying to calm himself done.

The man smiles widely, and it freaks Stiles the fuck out.

“Stiles.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I don't know when the next chapter will be posted (I'm really inconsistent with writing sooo) but just letting ya'll know it's going to be in Derek's POV because I feel like that's a thing that should happen.


	6. You Never Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter, but I was really eager to get back to Stiles' POV. There will most likely be another chapter later in Derek's POV. Enjoy (:

“Where the hell is she?” Laura demands, looking pissed. She probably was. It took hours to convince Cora to even agree to come out for a _visit_. No one bothered to tell their little sister that they were going to do anything they could to convince her to stay.

“She may be running late, Laura,” Derek says with a shrug, looking around their old house. He and Laura had gotten most of the structure torn down so they can start from scratch to rebuild their childhood home.

“You think maybe she decided not to come after all?” It’s easy to miss the uneasy nervousness to Laura’s voice, but Derek was raised with this woman; he knows her ins and outs, and she knows his. It’s kind of scary sometimes. Sometimes, for example, when she knows more about Derek’s love life than he does.

“She would have texted us if she backed down,” Derek tells her, trying to be reassuring, but he’s not sure it actually comes out that way because _where the hell is Cora_? She is more than an hour late. Should the Hales be worried? Derek tries not to because whenever he worried about Cora in the past, she would remind him that she can take care of herself with the friendly reminder of that she’s been doing it for the last six years.

Still. Derek worries about her. She may be able to take care of herself, but she is his little sister. He feels a brotherly responsibility to take care of her just like he feels for Laura and just like he’s sure Laura feels for him.

With a growl, Laura brings Derek back to the Preserve. “She’s not answering her phone,” she grumbles, staring at the forest like it’s offending her because Cora isn’t there.

Derek rubs a hand over his face and sighs. Cora always answers her phone because even though she tells Derek not to worry, she knows how panicked he gets if she doesn’t immediately respond to him. He can’t bear to lose her again. Then he looks at Laura, realizing that he can’t lose her again either.

He looks at his phone and dials Cora’s number, hearing ring after ring before it gets to the voicemail. Just like Laura, he growls at that. “She always answers,” he tells the forest.

“We should just wait here for a little bit longer,” Laura says, her voice breaking, but when Derek turns to look at her, her shoulders are squared and her chin is raised. She’s the alpha. She can’t be showing her weaknesses in front of her betas even if this beta is her brother.

“Yeah,” he just agrees instead of saying anything else.

 

After waiting for six hours, Derek returns to his apartment alone. Laura is officially worried about Cora and is making a search party. Derek was sent home, though. She was a step away from using her alpha powers to make him go. He left before she could do that, hoping Stiles would be here when he got back.

He has no messages, and he can’t hear any heartbeats from inside his apartment. He tries not to let the disappointment flood over him. It’s not like he was hoping he’d have the comfort of Stiles to make him feel better, to help soothe his worry over his little sister.

Derek pulls out his phone and drafts a message to Stiles, laughing once when he sees that the teenager had gotten ahold of his phone and changed his name.

**_To: Hot Stuff (23:33): You want me to come over?_ **

He waits about ten minutes for a response. Stiles usually responds within a minute, but Derek tries not to look too much into it when it takes up to an hour for the teenager to respond.

**_From: Hot Stuff (0:45): Plz don’t come over. Ill text u tmrw_ **

Derek frowns at his phone because Stiles doesn’t text like that. He doesn’t usually shorten his words, which means for some reason, he is in a rush, but why? He can’t still be at Deaton’s. Derek thinks about making a quick visit to the Stilinski’s, but he isn’t sure how well that would go over. If Stiles asked him not to come, he won’t. That’s only fair, right?

Without removing his clothes or making dinner, Derek just falls onto his bed and fall asleep. His last thought before succumbing to the darkness is that he didn’t turn out the lights before he got into bed.

He starts awake when he hears his phone vibrate once. He checks it, eyes blinking against the sudden brightness.

**_From: Hot Stuff (2:56): How is Cora?_ **

**_To: Hot Stuff (2:56): She’s missing._ **

Then his phone is ringing with a call from Stiles, which Derek automatically answers without saying a word.

“What happened?” Stiles demands, sounding slightly breathless. “Do you guys know anything yet?”

Derek closes his eyes at the sound of his mate’s voice. _Not mate_ he reminds himself as he responds to Stiles. “Laura is out searching for her, but I haven’t gotten any updates yet,” he answers and then pauses. “Stiles, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” the teenager answers automatically, and Derek wonders when the words became so automatic. “I just woke up with this bad feeling, and I had to see if everything was okay. Are you okay, Derek?”

“Yes, Stiles,” he sighs.

“Derek,” Stiles says reproachfully.

The man in question rubs his face, not wanting to talk about his feelings, but he knows Stiles won’t accept anything less. “I’m worried, okay?” he finally says. “I’m worried about Cora and why she isn’t answering her phone. I’m worried about you and how you won’t tell me anything about what happened at Deaton’s.”

Stiles clears his throat at that. “Nothing. He was just being vague and cryptic. You know Deaton. What you need to worry about right now is Cora, not me. I don’t want to make you even more worried, but I have a really bad feeling about this, Der. Like a really bad feeling.”

Ignoring his childhood nickname that Stiles used, Derek responds with, “Well, I have a feeling there’s something you’re not telling me, Stiles.”

Stiles sighs that over the phone. “I’ll tell you once I can, okay? I just can’t right now.”

“Fine,” Derek huffs. “I’m hanging up now, Stiles. Bye.”

“Wait,” the teenager calls out, so Derek keeps his phone at his ear, waiting. “Do you think you can maybe stay on the phone until I fall asleep? Please? I just need to hear your breathing to know that you’re still there and you’re okay.”

“You sure you don’t want me to come over?” Derek asks.

“No!” Stiles says too quickly. “I want to be alone right now, but I needed to hear your voice and know you’re okay.”

“I’m fine,” Derek says, frustrated with Stiles. “Go to sleep. I’ll be right here.”

“You’re not hanging up?” He sounds so hopeful. Derek could never say no that voice.

“I’m not hanging up,” he assures Stiles.

“Good. ‘Night, Hale,” the boy whispers.

“’Night, Stiles.” Derek is trying not to smile as he listens to the teenager’s breathing as it evens out slowly. He listens until he can tell that Stiles is sleeping. He thinks about hanging up then, but he doesn’t. He knows what Stiles is like now. Whenever Derek tries to leave the bed in the middle night, Stiles will clutch tighter at him and start whimpering until the werewolf is back in place.

Once, Derek had a nightmare while sharing the bed with Stiles. He woke up from the nightmare of fire to Stiles shushing him and holding him tightly as he wiped away Derek’s tears. They haven’t talked about it, which Derek is really okay with. He isn’t sure he wants to admit to Stiles that he woke up during that moment. He is pretty sure Stiles is under the impression that Derek never woke up, and Derek is keen to make it stay that way.

It doesn’t change the fact that Derek now trusts Stiles more than he has ever trust anyone outside of his family, and that scares him. These last times he trusted people outside of his family it ended with his entire family being burned to death and then his entire pack being shot full of arrows by another Argent.

But Stiles isn’t Kate or Scott. He’s not even close to either one, which makes it even easier to trust him. Still. As much as he isn't like previous betrayers, he _is_ Scott’s best friend and part of his pack, not Derek’s. He isn’t under the naïve impression that Stiles would choose him over Scott, but he also isn’t going to ask that of Stiles. Ever. It’s not fair of him to ask that.

That doesn’t stop him from wishing that Stiles was in his pack and not Scott’s. 


	7. Something You've Got

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here! Have a longer chapter!! Woohoo.

Stiles knows he should tell Derek, okay? He _knows_ he should, but he can’t because…he’s not scared of Peter. He really isn’t, but he does know Peter is unstable and that makes him think that maybe he will hold up on his threat of hurting Derek if Stiles says anything.

And since werewolves can tell when Stiles lies, he is avoiding his werewolf. Derek. His mate.

Ugh. What the fuck is his life? He has a _mate_ now. Stiles was just excited to finally have an actual relationship. It didn’t hurt that his boyfriend is really freaking hot. _Not boyfriend,_ a voice inside his mind reminds him. _Mate_.

At least that’s what Peter told him, and for some reason, Stiles believes him. He usually doesn’t believe the crazy Zombiewolf. Wait. Should that nickname be extended to Laura too? She also came back from the dead. Albeit, a thousand times less creepy than Peter but still. In real life people die and don’t come back.

Apparently, Stiles’ life isn’t real life because he would need all of his fingers and toes to count how many people he knows that have died and come back to life. Himself being one of them.

And his mom not being one of them.

**_To: Derek (12:13): Dr. D wants me to go back to his office. Hopefully there’s less cryptic bullshit._ **

At least Stiles can lie easily over text because Derek can’t hear his heartbeat. Going to Deaton’s is the truth, but Stiles never made it there yesterday, and now he has even more reason to see the mysterious vet.

**_From: Derek (12:15): K. We’re still searching for Cora._ **

**_To: Derek (12:15): Keep me updated. I hope you guys find her._ **

**_From: Derek (12:15): Thanks_ **

And that’s where the conversation ends. Stiles puts away his phone with a sigh, thinking about last night. How he couldn’t bear to face his werewolf, but he had to know he was okay. He had to hear his voice and his breathing to make sure it was real.

Stiles will never be able to tell Derek how much last night meant to him. Or at least he can’t tell him yet because he still can’t tell the werewolf why he appreciates it so much.

It wasn’t the best night’s sleep, but it was better than it would have been if Stiles was just alone. He woke up and noticed that the phone conversation was still going on. He could hear Derek’s softs breaths over the phone, noticing that the man was still sleeping, so he hung his phone before he could wake up and question Stiles about last night.

Stiles just can’t answer those questions. Not yet.

That’s why he is in his jeep, parking in front of Deaton’s office. He enters the waiting room, glancing at the older woman sitting in there with her pet cat. The cat hisses at Stiles like it knows that he runs with wolves. Stiles just smiles at the older lady, Mrs. Jenkins. He still has to keep up the appearances of being the Sheriff’s son.

“Hello, Stiles!” she greets him, returning his smile. “What are you doing here?”

“One of the dogs at the station is sick,” he easily lies. It’s so much easier to lie people he doesn’t love. “I’m picking up some medicine from Deaton.”

She nods like it’s a perfectly normal occurrence, which it is, but none of the dogs are sick right now. Not as far as Stiles knows. “I saw a man outside your house last night,” she starts up, and Stiles almost jumps at it, but he just smiles at her.

“Oh?” he says. “The man in my jeep?” He needs to make sure they’re on the same page before he can make up an excuse.

“Yes,” she answers, looking confused. “What was he doing there?”

Stiles opens his mouth to lie to her again, but he is interrupted by someone saying his name. He turns around to see Deaton. “I didn’t expect to see you so early,” he says, glancing at Mrs. Jenkins and her cat. “Your father sent you?”

Stiles lets out a sigh of relief that Deaton is going along with his cover story. “Yup!”

“Why don’t I take Clarice back now?” he says, reaching for the cat, which the owner gives up willingly. “Stiles, come on back so I can give you what you need.”

Stiles does exactly as Deaton asks, following him back with a smile back at Mrs. Jenkins. “It was nice seeing you, Mrs. Jenkins!”

Her smile is forced, and she watches him closely as she walks out the door. He completely relaxes once she’s out of sight, but then her cat is hissing at Stiles again. He makes a face at it. Who names their cat Clarice? That’s just asking for a demon cat.

Oh fuck. Too soon with the demon comments.

“Is the cat okay?” Stiles asks once Deaton places it on the examination table.

Deaton shrugs. “She can probably sense the supernatural on you, and it frightens her. You’re a threat.”

Stiles laughs at that. “Me? A threat? I’m as bad as they come, kitty.” He scrunches up his face then goes around the office, poking at things.

“So a man came to see you last night?” Deaton asks as he works on the cat. Stiles doesn’t watch out of fear that there might be blood or needles or ugh. He can’t with any of that.

“Yeah, Peter,” he answers.

“Have you talked to Derek about it?” the vet asks.

Stiles shakes his head before realizing he isn’t look at Stiles, so he should probably verbalize his answer. “Peter threatened to hurt Derek if I said anything to him.”

“So you didn’t tell him?”

“Well, I’m not going to get anyone hurt,” Stiles says.

“Especially not Derek?” Then Deaton is looking at him, and he freezes. Deaton knows something.

With a frown of concentration, Stiles looks back the vet. “Especially not Derek,” he finally admits. “Because he’s my mate, isn’t he?”

Deaton’s eyebrows rise slightly at that before he turns his attention back to the cat, which means Stiles’ attention is away from that scene. “So you do know?”

“Peter mentioned it. I wasn’t sure if I believed him, so I came here to ask you about it.” Stiles is frowning again. “Weird how Scott’s your employee, but I feel like I’m here more than he is now.”

“You certainly have much more to talk about than he does,” Deaton jokes, but it’s true. Scott has nightmares sometimes, but none of this is as bad as it is for Stiles.

“Why is it worse for me than them?” he finally asks.

Deaton sighs like he was hoping he wouldn’t have to answer that question. “You’re a spark,” Deaton answers softly. “You’re meant to become an emissary.”

“Me?” Stiles asks, shocked. He isn’t an emissary. Well, people should be listening to him like all the time. “I’m Scott’s emissary?”

Deaton shrugs at that. “You actually have a choice at this time,” he tells Stiles. “You can either be the McCall pack emissary or replace me as the Hale’s emissary. It is about time for me to retire anyway.”

“How old are you?” Stiles asks absentmindedly because that’s one hell of a choice. He sighs, putting his hands over his face. “I can’t be an emissary. I also can’t choose between my best friend and my mate. What kind of choice is that?”

“A choice that must be made,” Deaton says, turning back to Stiles. He folds his arms across his chest and studies the teenager for a few moments. “You’re an emissary. I can help train you and your magic, but I cannot make your choice for you.”

“The choice,” Stiles laughs bitterly into his hands, rubbing his face into his palms. “Alright. When do we start training because I need to hurry this up and find Cora. There is absolutely no way the others will be able to find her.”

“And why is that?” Deaton asks.

“Because they don’t know where the nemeton is.”

 

Stiles is exhausted physically and mentally. That didn’t go exactly as planned. For one, he came home with a million papers on different herbs and their uses. And now he has books about druids and nature and how to become one with nature or some shit like that.

_What is his life?_

But all of this makes him one step closer to being able to get Cora. He has no idea why she’s at the nemeton, why Peter is keeping her captive there. But wait. Peter isn’t supposed to know where the nemeton is.

 _Fuck_.

He bangs his head on the nearest solid object, which is Derek’s front door. He hopes the man is home because there is a lot of shit he needs to tell the werewolf. He starts banging his head against the door in lieu of knocking.

Then the door opens, but it isn’t Derek. It’s Laura. Not exactly who he wants to see but hey. It works.

“Alpha Hale,” Stiles greets with a grin. “Where’s your brother?”

“Your boyfriend?” she asks, leaning against the door frame without inviting him in, which _rude_. “He is out looking for Cora. I’m here with Allison because I’m not allowed to be alone.”

Stiles frowns and looks around until he sees the other brunette, who looks incredibly uncomfortable. Good thing Stiles is here. “Hey, Allison!” he calls out before turning his attention back to Laura. “But why here?”

She raises an eyebrow at that. “Am I not supposed to be here? Is there something you’re hiding here? Why are _you_ here, Stiles?”

“And why did she say Derek is your boyfriend?” Allison asks, coming up from behind Laura. Ugh they’re totally teaming up against him.

“Because she has this obsession of setting me up with the grumpy wolf,” Stiles answers smoothly, giving a look to Laura. “I’m here because I need to talk to him.”

“He should be back within the hour,” Laura says and then steps back to let Stiles in. “Want to wait with us?”

With a sigh, he steps in the apartment and crashes onto the couch, wanting to get his laptop. He can’t, though. Not without Allison seeing that his laptop is at Derek’s. Not even at Derek’s, but it’s on the other side of Derek’s bed. Because that doesn’t send any warning signals.

Allison sits next to him, their sides pressing together because even though they’re humans, being close to their packmates make things better. Stiles is in Scott’s pack. He is, but then when Laura sits next to him, he leans into her touch. He can’t be in both packs. That’s not how this works.

So instead of acknowledging either of the girls, he pulls his book on druids out and starts reading about the different uses of mountain ash because that could end up being useful against Peter. He gets so absorbed in the information that he doesn’t hear when Derek gets home.

He gets so engrossed into everything he doesn’t notice that everyone is gone until the book is being pulled out of his hands and then he is glaring at whoever stole his book. “You can’t just take people’s books!” he shouts, looking up at Derek, but then all the anger is gone. “Hi.”

Derek is frowning at him as he puts Stiles’ book on the coffee table on the page he was on. “Why do you smell guilty?” he asks.

Stiles glares at Derek for a moment before grabbing the book back and memorizing which page he’s on before closing it. “You can’t put books down like that. It ruins the spine, and do you know how old that book is, dude? It’s not even mine.”

“From Deaton?” Derek asks, and Stiles tries not to smile at his master distraction technique.

“Yup.” Stiles stretches out, looking around at the empty apartment. “Where’d everyone go?”

“Everyone is in for the night,” he answers, sitting next to Stiles. “We’re going to start again tomorrow morning. There’s not much else we can do right now.”

Stiles swallows over the lump in his throat and then turns his body to face Derek. “Wanna hear about Deaton’s?” he asks because this is a much easier topic for him. Derek gives him a nod to go on. “Well, I’m a druid. An emissary, I guess. And you’re…you’re, uh, my mate?”

Derek doesn’t look as surprised as he should. “Emissary?” he repeats with a frown. “Of Scott’s pack?”

“That’s the real kicker,” Stiles says with a nervous laugh, scratching the back of his neck then his hand lands on Derek’s thigh. He stares at that while he talks. “I can either be Scott’s emissary or take over Deaton’s place as Laura’s.”

“You’d be the Hale pack emissary?” Derek asks him.

Biting his lip, Stiles shrugs. “I could be.”

“But you’re not going to be, are you?” Derek sounds sad at that, which makes Stiles look up at him and his sad, werewolf face.

Without thinking, Stiles reaches his hand out and cups Derek’s cheek. “I haven’t decided,” he whispers. “How do I choose between my best friend and my mate, Derek?”

The man shrugs but leans into Stiles’ touch. “I want you to know, though, that I’m with you no matter what choice you make. I also think you might want to talk to Scott and Laura about this too since they’re the alphas you will have to deal with.”

Stiles frowns as his thumb rubs over Derek’s cheekbone. He doesn’t want to have to talk to anyone about this. He doesn’t want to be an emissary, but he did see a trick in that book where the picture showed the person throwing their arm up and a perfect circle of mountain ash falls around them. That would be pretty neat to learn.

But if Stiles chooses to be the McCall emissary, the Hale pack will still lose their emissary either way. And seriously. What is the chance that Scott will actually listen to Stiles? He never listens to Stiles. He never takes Stiles seriously, which could be a problem.

But if Stiles chooses to be the Hale emissary, Scott will take it as some sort of personal insult, which it isn’t.

“You’re thinking too hard,” Derek whispers, bringing Stiles out of his thoughts and into the real world right when he makes his decision too.

He just smiles at Derek and then tilts his head. “Wanna know what I was thinking about?” he teases.

Derek just shrugs. “Emissaries. Druids.”

“The fact that we have been dating all of two days and haven’t kissed yet,” Stiles answers with a smile. “I feel like we should probably change this. Like as soon as possible. Your lips. On mine. My lips. On yours. Let’s get it going, buddy.”

“Maybe if you ever shut up I would kiss you,” Derek suggests.

“Or you could make me stop talking by kissing me.” Not that that’s ever been a fantasy of Stiles’. Nope. Not ever.

“Where’s the romance in that?” Derek asks sarcastically.

Stiles slides his hand slightly so that his thumb is brushing across Derek’s bottom lip instead of his cheek. His lips part under Stiles’ thumb, and Stiles can feel the man’s breath hot against his skin. Also, in case anyone wants to know, the feel of Derek’s lips on Stiles’ skin? Best feeling ever. Stiles may actually be in danger of popping one and they _still_ haven’t kissed.

Then Stiles just smiles slowly, taking his hand away from his mate and putting it in his lap. “You’re right,” he says. “We should wait for the right moment since you’re such a hopeless romantic.”

Derek’s eyes flash blue at that, and he looks _pissed_. And all Stiles can do is smile and hold in his laughter at how pissed Derek seems to be.

Then he dramatically yawns. “Oh, boy. It’s been a long day. Seriously, though. I’m tired.” Stiles stands up and looks down at Derek. “I’m going to bed. Are you coming?” It’s like they’re fucking domesticated at this point. “Also, I changed my mind. I don’t want you moving into an apartment with Laura. I feel like that will make for some very awkward walks of shame on my part.”

Derek stands up, following Stiles to the bed. “Walks of shame?” Derek echoes.

Ugh. Stiles swears half of their conversations are just Derek repeating something Stiles _just said_. That’s not an actual conversation, for fuck’s sake, Derek. “Yes, walks of shame,” Stiles says, jumping onto the bed and looking up at the werewolf. “I’m going to be spending the night often because it’s a little easier for me to do the walk of shame in front of Laura than it is for you to do the walk of shame in front of my dad.”

“True, but I could just sneak out the window,” the older man points out as he pulls of his shirt, and he is totally using that to his advantage, isn’t he? He is using his wonderfully sculpted torso as a way to distract Stiles from their conversation. Possibly to distract Stiles into kissing him.

Fuck him. “Then you’d have to do the walk of shame in your own apartment. How pathetic?” Then Stiles pulls off his own shirt and then his pants because jeans and sleeping never go together. Plus, he likes the look Derek gets when Stiles isn’t clothed. It’s funny looking. Kind of pinched and constipated and his eyes start darting around because he doesn’t want to look at Stiles, but he totally is.

Two can play at this game. “Hey, since I’m thinking about this,” Stiles throws out as Derek gets onto the bed, the mattress dipping slightly underneath his weight as he settles down next to Stiles. “I need you to do me a huge solid.”

“Okay.” Derek looks confused, but Stiles knows he is going to agree no matter what, and that may or may not give him a surge of power and affection.

Stiles doesn’t want to know what that says about him as a person. Seriously. A psychologist would have a field day with the people Stiles hangs out with, including himself. “I need you to not tell anyone that I’m an emissary,” he finally says, voice hard and serious because this is really important to his decision. “Like I wasn’t supposed to tell you, but I did because I don’t really want to keep things from you, and you’re my mate. I feel like you’re just going to have to know everything. So I need you to never tell anyone ever that I’m an emissary because I made my decision of whose pack I’m emissary-ing”

“That’s not a word,” Derek says distractedly before catching on. “Which did you choose?”

Stiles shakes his head. “That’s the thing. _No one_ will know which pack I’m the emissary of. Seriously, Der. No one. Not even you, and I really want to tell you, but I don’t think anyone except for the alpha should know. I also have some things to discuss with Deaton before making my final decision, but I have one.”

Derek takes a deep breath and nods before lying down. His hand falls on the side of Stiles’ head and drags him until his face is hitting the pillow. “Go to sleep,” Derek tells him.

“Wow. You’re so romantic,” Stiles mumbles against the pillow, moving his head away from Derek’s hand. “Like that was so gentle. I’m really touched by your tenderness. I feel like we just made love. That’s how tender it was.”

Derek rolls his eyes before closing and wrapping an arm around Stiles’ waist. “Go to sleep,” he repeats.

“I think you have a word quote for the day,” Stiles says after a few silent minutes. “Like you can only say a certain amount of words each day, so what you do to sneak around that is barely talk, repeat other people’s words because those don’t count as your own, and then repeat what you’ve already said that day multiple times.”

“Good theory,” Derek mumbles.

Stiles huffs at that, glaring at the face merely inches from his. Then he makes another decision. He brushes his lips on Derek’s forehead and then both of his cheeks before carefully kissing the corner of Derek’s mouth. “Goodnight, sweetie,” he whispers against his lips before rolling over so that his back is facing Derek’s chest.

Derek pulls Stiles closer to him before pressing his lips on the back of the teenager’s neck, making Stiles shiver in anticipation of something that is definitely not going to happen tonight. “Goodnight, Stiles.”

Oh, fuck this shit.

 

“I have made my decision!” Stiles announces upon entering Deaton’s office. His actual office too. The one with a desk and a computer and all that important shit.

Deaton just looks up from his busywork, raising an eyebrow up at Stiles. “And that was?”

“I have a couple of questions first,” he says, sitting in the chair in front of Deaton’s desk. “Will it just be the alpha who knows I’m the emissary?” Deaton nods at that. Stiles continues. “Do I have to be a part of that pack?” Deaton shakes his head. “Can I be one pack’s emissary and be in another pack?”

“Why don’t you just use their names, Stiles? It will be much easier to keep track of,” Deaton suggests.

Stiles rolls his eyes because did the Man of Vagueness just ask him to add details? “If I’m Laura’s emissary, can I still be in Scott’s pack?” he asks, and Deaton nods his head. “Can I be in both packs?” Now that’s the hardest question.

Deaton seems to agree because he can’t just answer it with the movement of his head. “I’m not exactly sure, Stiles. No one has done it before, but that’s not saying no one can. Of course, yours is special circumstance. Already being in a pack when you become the mate of a beta in another pack.”

What can I say, I’m a special snowflake,” Stiles says because of _course_ he makes everything complicated. Of course. As if it isn’t rare enough for humans to be in a part of a pack. “So there’s no saying I can’t be in both?”

“To be honest, I think your loyalties may actually be evenly divided,” Deaton finally says. “As long as the two packs never have a disagreement.”

Stiles snorts at that. “They will totally have disagreements, but I guess my job is to be the mediator. I can work with that. Thanks, Doc.”

“Stiles, be sure to return soon for training,” the man says before Stiles can get out of the door. “Also, you may find it prudent to bring along your mate for these sessions.”

Stiles nods at that before leaving. Once he gets into his jeep, he drives straight to Derek’s, which he now has a key to? It’s weird. And they’re like fifty steps ahead in their relationship than they should be, yet they’re still not kissing. Yeah, that’s a thing.

So when he opens the door to his boyfriend’s apartment, he isn’t exactly expecting to see the girl he was in love with for almost an entire decade sitting on the couch. “Hey, Lydia?” Stiles says, closing the door behind him. “What are you doing here?”

She looks up at him from the TV show she was watching. Her hand lifts up as she clicks the TV off before focusing completely on Stiles. “What are you doing here?” she asks.

And ugh this is just déjà vu all over again but with a different woman. Why are there always women in Derek’s apartment? Should that be concerning?

“And why do you have a key to Derek’s apartment?” she continues, eyeing Stiles’ hand.

He sighs, putting the key back into his pocket before dropping onto the couch next to Lydia, his backpack crashing onto the floor. “Um, it’s a secret?” he offers with a shrug.

She rolls her eyes at him. “Then I’m not telling you why I’m here. We’ll just have to wait it out.” She turns the TV back on and starts watching a stupid reality show. And ugh it’s _Teen Mom_ , which Stiles just can’t with that show, okay? He _can’t_.

“Fine!” he says because Lydia knows how much he hates that shows, and she’s totally using it against him. “I’ll tell you why I’m here. Just turn off the stupid show.” She does as she ask, looking back at him. “Derek and I are dating.”

She raises an eyebrow at that. “And you already have a key to his apartment?” she asks suspiciously. “Stiles, do you remember who you’re dealing with? Dating sounds way too casual for you to have his key.”

“ _Fine_ ,” he groans. “We’re…mates.”

She folds her arms across her chest, leaning back against the couch as she studies him questioningly. “Mates? Like soul mates?”

He kind of just shrugs at that one. “I don’t know. It’s a werewolf thing, and apparently, I’m Derek’s mate. Things just kind of happened, and then we both kind of realized that we’re mates. I haven’t even kissed the dude, Lydia.”

“But you want this to happen, right?” She looks incredibly invested in that question. “This isn’t against your will, right? You want this to be happening. You want to kiss Derek, but you just haven’t yet?”

“Yes, to all of the above,” he answers. “I want to be Derek’s mate. I want to hold his hand in public and go on dates and kiss him whenever I want to. I want to grow old with him and raise children with him. Okay? These feelings are confusing and they’re all happening at once, so I’m kind of freaking out here. Thanks for that!”

She rolls her eyes, but she is watching him carefully like he’s about to go into a panic attack, which he isn’t because he already had one over this subject thankyouverymuch and he’s done now.

“Why are you here, Lydia?” he asks, changing the subject.

“I need to talk to Laura,” she says simply. “And I wasn’t going to wait around in the Hale house all day for her. I figured that she would come here after they’re done searching for Laura.”

Stiles nods at that and glances at the clock. “They should be here in a couple of hours. Why do you need to talk to Laura?” Coincidentally, he needs to also talk to Laura.

“It’s none of your business,” she bites out, but Stiles just gives her a look, and she sighs. “Fine. I want to talk to her about possibly joining her pack instead of being in Scott’s.” Her lips are thinned out like she’s nervous about admitting this, but she doesn’t want to show it.

“Lyds,” Stiles says carefully, making her really look at him. “You’re talking to the guy who is mated with someone in Laura’s pack while he’s in Scott’s. I know exactly where you’re at right now.”

“What’s your solution?” She tries to make it come out like she’s taunting him, but deep down, Stiles knows she wants to know his solution so she can figure out hers.

“I’m going to be in both packs,” he says like the solution was really that simple for him, which it kind of was, but there was also a lot of freaking out before the solution became known.

“Well, I’d rather just be one,” Lydia says primly.

“Not that I’m saying my best friend is the best alpha ever, but why don’t you want to be in his pack anymore?” Stiles asks. “Honestly, I’m just curious. I’m not going to be mortally offended over you switching packs as long as it doesn’t become a reoccurring thing.”

She shakes her head at that. “I just feel like Scott’s leadership skills are lacking, and if I’m going bother myself with being in a pack, I want to be in one where the alpha knows what she is doing and has the power to handle her problems.”

“Scott’s still just a kid,” Stiles says as he actually acknowledges it. “It’s going to take him a while before he gets the hang of things, but I completely get where you’re coming from, and I can’t say that I’m surprised. I’m guessing Aiden is following you?”

She shrugs. “Aiden can do whatever he wants,” she bites out. “He’s not mine or anything.”

But Stiles is totally picking up on the subtext. “You want him to be, though. Don’t you?”

She looks at Stiles like he said that her answer on a math equation was wrong. “I don’t care what he does. He’s just an easy fuck. And he’s good. There is nothing more I could want from him.”

Instead of arguing with her, he just nods. He knows exactly what it’s like to push down certain feelings until they kind of just appear out of nowhere. Not that that’s happened recently or anything.

So instead of saying anything actually, Stiles just pulls out another book that Deaton gave to him. This one is about werewolf pack dynamics, mates, and even has a tiny bit of information on emissaries. But really. The things Stiles is currently interested in are the first two because if he is going to be a part of two packs, he needs to know the ins and outs of packs.

He also needs to figure out how to face a werewolf by himself and actually have a fighting chance. And after talking to Deaton about it, saving Cora is going to be a bit more difficult than just going through Peter. According to Deaton, Peter is doing something with Cora that relates back to magic, but not even the mysterious vet knows what exactly the creepy uncle is doing with his niece.

Oh, fuck. Stiles really hope it’s nothing sexual because one ew and two, Cora doesn’t deserve that. She also doesn’t deserve to be held captive against her will, and Stiles really needs to figure his shit out so he can save her.

“I’m getting really tired of coming back to _my_ apartment and having it full of humans that aren’t even in my pack,” Derek says from behind the couch, making Stiles jump in surprise.

He just tilts his head back to look up at the man and smile, knowing exactly what kind of view he is giving his mate. A view that his mate likes. A _lot_.

“Are you really surprised to see your boyfriend here, Derek?” Lydia asks.

Derek tears his gaze from Stiles’ long neck to glare over at Lydia. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

Stiles reaches back, patting Derek’s forearm reassuringly. “She’s Lydia. Lydia knows all. She also threatened me with awful reality television to make me talk. Also, does it really matter who knows?”

Derek looks down at him, confused. “It doesn’t matter to me,” is all he says, but he is looking at Stiles like him casually admitting that they can tell people now was a big deal.

“Awesome,” he says with a smile, closing his book and standing up with stretch. “Hey, Laura.”

The alpha turns to look at him from the kitchen with a sad smile, so Stiles is guessing they still don’t know anything. Okay, he kind of figured they didn’t because neither of them want to even suspect Peter, who has been graciously helping out too. Stiles really wishes he could say something, but if he says something without being able to actually do something, then Peter will hurt Derek.

“Lydia, you should go talk to her. I’ll distract Derek and make sure he doesn’t listen,” Stiles says, winking over at Derek while Lydia takes a deep breath and walks over to the kitchen.

To distract him, Stiles grabs Derek’s arm and pulls him onto the couch. He tosses his legs over the man’s lap and smiles lazily at him. “So I learned some fun stuff about mates,” he says, his eyebrows jumping up and down.

“And that is?” Derek asks, but Stiles thinks he already knows. He was born a werewolf.

“Actually. I’m kind of interested in seeing what you know.” Stiles gives him another smile, settling into the couch and leaning against the arm rest, perfectly comfortable where he is.

Things get better when Derek’s hands rest on Stiles’ calves, his fingers playing with the teenager’s jeans. “Um, just what my parents told me,” he says with a shrug. “I know there’s a ritual to complete before becoming mates is _official_.” Stiles is actually very familiar with this ritual. He just finished reading that part of the book. “It’s unusual for a mate to be human, but I’m not entirely surprised it turned out to be you because you have a knack for being unusual.”

“Hey,” Stiles says, slightly offended. “Is that really how you’re going to talk to your mate? I feel like you should be nicer to me.”

“Are you going to be nicer to me?” Derek asks.

Stiles rolls his eyes and scoffs. “Of course not, asshole. That’s not how this relationship works.”

Derek just mumbles something that sounds like “Double standards,” before moving on. “My mom always said that being mated gives makes you more powerful as an individual. It’s actually even more significant for an alpha.”

“So why didn’t you claim me then?” Stiles asks.

Derek gives him a really dry look for that one. Like dryer than the Sahara over here. “I was kind of busy, Stiles. If you don’t remember, I was creating a pack of my own and then dealing with alpha werewolves then a darach. Tell me, when should I have brought up the fact that you’re my mate? During the time you held me up in the water for eight hours? Or how about when we were both paralyzed? Oh, even better. How about after Kali shoved a pipe through my sternum?”

“Okay, with the sassy sarcasm,” Stiles says, holding up his hands. “Seriously. I get it, okay? It was a joke. No need to get so testy.”

“What does it matter? You’re just trying to keep me from listening in to Lydia and Laura’s conversation.”

Stiles gives him a hard look. “You’re not, right? Because I will be really upset if you are.”

Derek rolls his eyes but shakes his head. “Why listen to them when I can ask you what Lydia is asking Laura? At least you’ll be a little more straightforward.”

Stiles sighs, thumping his head on the back of couch because he knows he’s going to tell Derek because Stiles fucking tells Derek everything. “She’s asking Laura to become a part of your pack.”


	8. Where's Your Head?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? Two chapters in one day?? Someone's procrastinating...

Derek’s eyebrows shoot up faster than Stiles has ever seen. “Lydia wants to join our pack?”

Stiles nods once and then takes a deep breath. “I actually wanted to talk to you about that,” Stiles says on an exhale. “Um, I was thinking of joining your pack too. Since we’re mates, you know? It just feels kind of weird to not be in the same pack as you.”

Stiles can’t decipher Derek’s face. It’s a mixture of shock and something else. It’s that something else Stiles can’t figure out. “You’d leave Scott’s pack for me?” Derek asks, looking so hopeful and fuck.

“It’s not exactly like that,” Stiles says with a wince, hating how much of an asshole he sounds. “I’m not choosing either of you over the other. I talked to Deaton about it, and I’m going to try to be in both packs. If Scott’s cool with it and Laura, of course.”

“What if Scott isn’t okay with it?” Derek looks scared for that answer.

“Then I’ll just be in your pack.” Stiles shrugs like it’s no big deal even though Scott kind of rejecting his relationship with Derek would be pretty hurtful. “If Scott is going to make me choose, I’ll choose you. Just like if you made me choose, I’d choose Scott.”

Derek nods at that, but he doesn’t say anything more, and Stiles is really hoping he’s not listening in on the private conversation between Laura and Lydia, but then again Stiles would probably be listening if he could because he is really nosey. Derek doesn’t seem as nosey, though, so who knows? He may actually be a gentleman and let them talk in private. Maybe it’s different when you’re born a werewolf. You know how hard it is to get privacy, so you try your hardest to give it when you can. Huh.

Finally, the two women come out, and that’s when Stiles actually thinks about Lydia being in the Hale pack. That’s fucking frightening. Lydia is one of the scariest people he has ever met, and Laura would be lucky to have her in her pack.

“Stiles,” Laura calls out, making him look up at her. “I believe we have to talk also.”

He takes a deep breath for courage and looks to his mate. “I’m going to need you to leave, Der,” he says softly. “If you could go grab dinner or something. I’ll pay for it. I just need you out of hearing distance.”

Derek frowns at that but stands up anyway. “I’ll be back in a little bit. Text me when it’s safe. Laura, you staying for dinner?”

She seems to think about it for a minute before shaking her head. Then Laura and Stiles watch Lydia and Derek leave. Stiles waits for Laura to give him a cue before he starts talking. Once she gives the cue, he talks.

“So I’m an emissary,” he starts with, and she doesn’t look surprised.

“For the McCall pack,” she says simply like she already knew this. Like it was already decided.

But he shakes his head. “For your pack. Scott will never take me seriously. I’m his best friend. It’s hard for me to take him seriously as my alpha, so I kind of figured he would have an even harder time seeing me as someone who has as much power as he does because that’s never been the case. With you, I feel like you would respect my advice and actually listen, take it into consideration.”

“But you’re in a different pack,” she says like that should change everything.

He nods. “But I’ve talked to Deaton about it, and there’s no reason I can’t be in both, is there?”

“It will be hard,” Laura tells him like he doesn’t know. “Never mind that as alphas, we’re protective over our pack and are prone to get jealous. How are you going to decide which alpha to listen to when it comes down to it?”

Stiles shrugs. “The alpha that I believe is making the right decision at that point in time.”

“Why do you want to be in both packs?” she asks. “Why not be like Lydia and just change your alliance?”

Stiles sighs at that. “Because Scott is my best friend. He’s my brother. And when I’m with the McCall pack, I feel like I’m at home. When I’m with your pack, I feel like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be.”

“Okay, so what made you decide to want to join my pack?” Gee, Laura is full of questions tonight. Woo. Well, it must be a confusing night for her as well. “It’s different than just your emissary duties. An emissary doesn’t have to be in pack to complete their job.”

Stiles nods. “I know, but your brother is my mate,” he says firmly. “And it feels wrong to be in a different pack than my mate.”

Laura nods at that because she probably understands this more than Scott ever could. Stiles doesn’t think Scott has found his mate. Allison definitely wasn’t it.

“But if I’m your emissary, you can’t say anything,” he adds hurriedly. “Not even Derek knows which alpha I’m choosing, and no one else except for Deaton even knows I’m a druid. I need you to keep that secret please. No one needs to know this except for you.”

She nods again. “I understand,” she says. “And I accept you as my emissary only because despite your goofy exterior, you’re really clever, Stiles. The things you say when you assume people aren’t listening…let’s just say they’re eye opening. Ready for your first emissary meeting with an alpha?”

That question feels like it totally came from nowhere, and huh. Maybe he does need to have a meeting with Laura. She needs to know what Peter is up to even if Stiles doesn’t know exactly what he’s up to. “There are things that need to be discussed,” he says with a nod. “Are we doing this now?”

“Yes,” she says and she sits down on the couch. “You may want to sit. This talk is turning out to be longer than either of us thought.”

“Poor Derek,” Stiles says, remembering the guy just waiting around somewhere until he’s allowed back into his own apartment.

Laura snorts. “He knows how these things work,” she says with an eye roll. “We need to talk about Cora.”

“If I give you the information I have, you have to promise to really listen to my advice,” Stiles throws in before she can continue. “I know things that will help, but if I tell you, you can’t just go storming in until we know more.”

She thinks about that long and hard with a sigh. “I need to know what you know, Stiles. If that means not taking action until you think we should, then that’s what I’ll do.”

Stiles almost gapes at that. Someone is listening to his advice. Someone is legitimately listening to every word he has to say and not just listening but _actually following his advice_. It’s kind of a power trip. That someone will take everything Stiles has to say to heart like he really is right and that he is someone that should be listened to. Stiles thinks that this whole emissary thing may actually turn out to be great.

“I know where Cora is,” he says. “Peter visited me the other night. He is planning on kidnapping me soon, and I want you and Derek to be okay with that. I know exactly where he is going to take me. I have no idea what he wants to be doing, but I need you and Derek to not make any rash decisions. I know you will want to. It’s your sister, your pack, and Derek’s mate. I’m not telling you where Cora is yet, but believe me when I say, you’ll know before I leave.” When did it become his life for him to so easily talk about his kidnapping? Seriously?

“What did Peter say?” Laura asks.

“I can’t say too much,” Stiles warns. “He threatened Derek if I said too much to you guys. And I’m not willing to risk Derek yet, and I know what Peter is capable of. But Peter just kind of rambled about power. This is just another way for him to get power. I’m not sure how, but it has to do with the nemeton.”

“Cora is at the nemeton?” she clarifies.

Stiles nods. “The only reason I’m telling you that is because I know you have no idea where that is. Neither does Derek. Only I do. Well, so do Scott and Allison, but they can’t be involved until the very last minute. You may need them at the end. I’m trying to do as much research as I can and as much training as I can before Peter makes his final move. I need to figure out what’s going on before I go. I need to be a few steps ahead of Peter.”

Laura frowns and sighs. “I hate that you’re doing all of this yourself, Stiles,” she finally says, sounding upset. “I want to be able to help you, but I know there is no way I can. But you’re pack, so I feel protective over you.”

Stiles nods, pulling out his phone to let Derek know he can come back. “I just,” he starts and then stops with a sigh. “You can’t trust Peter. You’re the final piece in his puzzle. I know he’s doing this so he can become an alpha again, but he is doing it a different way. A way to give reassurance that it won’t be taken so easily this time. I’m serious about the whole not being alone with him thing.”

Laura runs a hand through her hair and sighs, looking like she’s completely stressed. Well, so is Stiles. But she has been running around for days trying to find her little sister while Stiles has been going through every single one of Deaton’s books for more information. “I promise I won’t let that happen,” she says, sounding resigned. “Derek is on his way up. I’ll see you, Stiles. If you need me, you have my number.”

He gives her a smile and stands up with her. “Later, Laura. Thanks for everything, and I’m sorry.”

She gives him a sad smile in response and opens the door for Derek, who is carrying takeout and looking around like he’s trying to figure out what happened between the two of them. The siblings part ways, and Derek steps into the apartment, closing the door behind him. He silently studies Stiles, probably knowing exactly how the teenager is feeling.

“I’m exhausted,” he says out loud. “And starving. Food please?”

Derek silently hands over the food and goes into the kitchen to grab drinks. Stiles collapses on the couch, burying his face in his hands. He wants to tell Derek so badly, but Stiles knows Derek. They know each other so well at this point, and if Stiles tells Derek where Cora is, all hell will break loose. Derek will try to go after her, Laura will try to stop him, and nothing will go according to plan. Not that they exactly have a plan right now, but still. Shit will hit the fan.

But hiding things from Derek? Stiles read up on mates. He _knows_ things now. Things humans aren’t usually privy to know. He knows how mates are supposed to share everything. And Stiles and Derek have been dating for what? Not even a week? And Stiles already feels like there’s a mountain of shit he isn’t telling his mate.

And let Stiles tell you, that is not a fun feeling. At all.

 

Stiles practically hates school at this point. It’s just so _incongruous_. Stiles has much more important stuff to do like research more druid stuff than sit here and watch Finstock ramble about how economics relates back to lacrosse.

It really doesn’t in case you wanted to know.

School just doesn’t seem like a priority anymore, and Stiles still has another year and a half of this shit. What is learning about metaphors or logarithms when Stiles is in life-or-death situations on a weekly basis? Why should he care about this stuff anymore?

“Hello, class!” a woman greets, entering the classroom. “It sure has been a while, hasn’t it? And here we are again.”

Stiles looks up lazily at the substitute then freezes. No. No. No, this cannot be happening. This can’t be his life.

But that’s when all the puzzle pieces fill in together to give him the full picture.

And that’s when he figures it all out. Peter’s entire plan. Ranging from needing Cora to Stiles to Laura. Everything makes sense now, and _fuck_.

This is the time when Stiles really regrets taking AP Calc because the only person who would be in this class, has a different teacher than Stiles. Fucking Lydia. Fucking administration not putting him in all the same classes as his pack. He needs his pack with him at all times. No. Instead, all he has is Danny, and Danny still knows nothing. They should really clue the guy in sometime, but that isn’t the point right now.

It definitely isn’t the point when Jennifer Blake is staring right at Stiles as he panics because he is definitely panicking right now.

Her lips slowly form into a grin as she stares at him. “Stiles, what a pleasure to see you again,” she says, and how does she look so sincerely nice? That’s the most alarming because Stiles can _always_ tell when someone is evil. Apparently it’s an emissary thing, but he can’t tell that Jennifer is evil. Everything about her screams _normal_ and _nice_. Just your average substitute teacher that likes to sacrifice people in her spare time.

“Ms. Blake,” he greets with her same smile because Stiles is excellent at playing it cool. “So good to see you. Too bad Mr. Williams being sick is what made you come back to visit your favorite student.”

She laughs at that like this is just a perfectly normal exchange between a student and teacher. “Sh, Stiles. No one can know I have a favorite.” She sends him a wink and then they finally start class.

Danny leans over to Stiles. “Dude, do you have a crush on Ms. Blake or something?”

Stiles looks at him with an eyebrow raised and scoffs. He looks at Ms. Blake from the corner of his eye. She may be writing on the whiteboard, but she is definitely listening to this conversation. “Nah, Dannyboy,” Stiles says with a grin. “I’m taken.”

Danny raises an eyebrow at that. “Oh, yeah? Who? Did you and Scott finally admit that there’s more to your relationship?”

Stiles twists his face in disgust. “Ugh. Gross, Danny. Now I need brain bleach. Scott is my _brother_. There isn’t more to that relationship. No, he’s an older guy. Pretty hot.” Stiles doesn’t mention that Danny has met him under the pretenses of him being Stiles’ cousin. Oh, gross. More brain bleach please.

“An older guy?” Danny asks. “I’m impressed, Stiles.”

“It’s okay. I know you’re just covering up your jealousy. I know you’ve had a huge crush on me all during high school.”

Danny rolls his eyes, probably thinking about his own hot boyfriend, Ethan. “Yes, Stiles. I’ve been pining since freshman year. How will I go on?”

Jennifer brings the class back to attention, but her gaze always ends up on Stiles, and it’s kind of freaking him out a bit. Mainly because he needs to get out of this class as soon as possible and call Derek. Derek definitely needs to know about this. Then he has to talk to Laura. And then Deaton. Oh, fuck. There’s a lot of people he needs to talk to right at this second.

Once the bell rings, Stiles shoots out of his seat, practically running back to his jeep while he takes out his phone.

“Stiles?” Derek answers. “Aren’t you still at school?”

“Just got out,” he says breathlessly, jumping into his car. He puts the phone on the dash, putting it on speaker as he puts his car into gear. “We have a huge problem, Derek. Like huge. Bigger than fucking Texas, okay?”

“Okay,” Derek says, sounding confused but also extremely worried.

“Guess who I saw today?” Stiles says, driving straight to Derek’s apartment.

“Who?” Derek doesn’t like guessing games and refuses to be a part of them whenever Stiles asks him these kinds of questions.

“Jennifer,” Stiles finally says because he doesn’t want it to be true and saying it aloud, relaying this information to someone who knows how dangerous this woman is. It’s hard.

“Stiles, Jennifer is dead,” Derek says slowly.

He groans at that, pulling into the apartment parking lot. “Yes, I _know_ that, Derek. But how many people do we know have died and actually stayed dead? You know what? I’m hanging up. I’m here. Text Laura please.” Stiles hangs up the phone, pocketing it as he takes his backpack and runs up to Derek’s apartment. The door is already open by the time he gets there, so he closes it behind himself and starts looking for Derek.

“I’m in the kitchen,” the man calls out.

Stiles wanders in with a smirk. “Now this is how I like ya. Barefoot and in the kitchen.” Stiles gives his boyfriend a wink.

“As long as I’m not pregnant,” Derek mumbles under his breath as he turns to look at Stiles. “Jennifer is alive?”

Stiles nods, leaning against the counter because he is suddenly exhausted. “She’s my AP Calc substitute,” he answers. “She seemed very excited to see me. We had a lovely talk about how she killed a bunch of people and how she tried to kill my dad.”

“In front of the entire class?” Derek asks, looking at Stiles like he is debating how smart the teenager really is.

Stiles rolls his eyes. “I was being sarcastic, idiot.” He runs a hand through his hair and leans his head back against the cabinet. “I didn’t sign up for this,” he groans.

“What did you sign up for?” Derek asks.

Stiles moves his head back to normal to give a look to Derek, his eyebrows waggling. “I signed up for you,” he answers, pushing himself off the cabinets and into Derek’s arms that automatically wrap around him. Stiles’ fingers thread themselves into his mate’s soft hair, and his entire body practically sighs with the touch. Stiles could definitely get used to this kind of power. “Remember how I said waiting until the right moment to kiss you?” Stiles whispers.

Derek’s eyes slide down until they’re staring at the teenager’s lips, and he nods slightly in answer to the question. “It was a stupid idea.”

“Definitely stupid,” Stiles agrees in a whisper, leaning closer to Derek. The man leans closer, and then finally their lips touch. It’s just a soft peck, and it’s Stiles’ first kiss, but it’s perfect. Beyond perfect. “Why did we wait so long to do that? We could’ve been doing this for _weeks_.”

Derek just smiles slightly before his hand slides up to behind Stiles’ neck to push him in for another kiss. This kiss is a bit more. Their lips are smashed together. Stiles is holding onto Derek for life as Derek’s tongue slides against his bottom. He gasps at the touch, giving the werewolf full access to Stiles’ mouth, which he takes complete and full advantage of.

And it’s wonderful, but Stiles is getting tired of being the only one getting explored, so he starts initiating the kiss, taking control. He slides his tongue into Derek’s mouth then drags his teeth over his bottom lip before diving in again.

“Ugh gross.”

The boys pull back from each other to look over at Laura, who does look thoroughly disgusted, but there’s a glint in her eyes. “I feel like we have more important things to do than make out in a kitchen,” she points out.

Stiles blushes and slowly exits the warmth of Derek’s arms but still stays close enough so that their sides are touching. Stiles isn’t sure that he can really move much farther from Derek ever again. School is such a pain in the ass.

“We do,” Stiles agrees. “But it was nice while it lasted.” He clears his throat, looking back up at Laura. “Remember how we told you about the darach that died?” The alpha slowly nods. “Well, she’s alive again.”

“Does anyone in this town stay dead?” Laura exclaims.

Stiles laughs once. “Apparently not.”

“What is she doing here?” Laura asks.

Stiles looks down, knowing he can’t lie and say he doesn’t know or that he’s trying to figure it out because Derek will hear it. Well, so will Laura, but she knows not to push it. He takes a deep breath and puts his chin back up. “I’m working on it,” he answers instead.

“What does that mean?” Derek asks.

Stiles just shrugs. “It means that I’m working on it, Derek.”

“Working on figuring it out?” he asks. “Why do I feel like you know a lot more than you should?”

Stiles just beams. “I’m turning into Deaton,” he says with a wink, and Laura laughs, but Derek is just glaring at him. “Once I know something substantial, I’ll tell you, Derek. Okay? Right now it’s just theories. I really need to talk to Deaton and Scott. Plus, you need to come with me to Deaton’s.”

“Why?” Derek asks.

“I don’t know. Deaton told me that when I go back for training to bring you.” Stiles has a possible idea for why that is, but he’s not exactly ready to admit that yet.

“I’ll talk to Scott,” Laura says. “You two go to Deaton’s. For training.”

Stiles nods once, accepting his alpha’s orders. Derek just glares at the two of them before they all walk out. Stiles automatically heads to his jeep with an angry werewolf following him. He starts driving, waiting Derek out because he is not going to end this silence. If Derek is upset, he needs to use his words.

“Why are you telling Laura more than you’re telling me?” Derek finally asks.

Stiles sighs, grip tightening on the wheel. “Because Laura is the alpha, Derek. There are some stuff that need to stay between her and me. I’m trying to tell you all I can, but I can’t tell you some things right now because it’s dangerous for you.”

“Dangerous for me?” Derek exclaims. “I can take care of myself, Stiles.”

Stiles shoots him a glare. “You don’t think I know that? You’re a werewolf. I get it, okay? I know you’re stronger and faster than me and that you can protect yourself, but guess what? I’m your mate now. I take care of you. You take care of me. It’s a two-way street.”

Derek is still brooding over it, though. “Are you sure you wouldn’t rather be with Laura?”

That makes Stiles stop everything and just stare at Derek. “Do you really think this is what that’s about? You’re jealous? You really think I want Laura?”

“She is the alpha,” he grumbles out.

Stiles’ mouth opens, but he doesn’t know what to say to that. So words just come pouring out as always. “Seriously, Derek? You think I would rather be with Laura because she’s the alpha? There’s a reason I never made a move on you when you were alpha. That power scares me. That’s too much for one person. I don’t want to be involved in that. I’m not some power hungry monster like Peter. For fuck’s sake, Derek. Really? I can’t believe you right now.”

Derek just looks down at his lap while Stiles parks the jeep. “I just don’t understand why you’re with me.”

Stiles groans. “See? I knew there was a reason that the two of us shouldn’t be in a relationship not just with each other but with anyone. Can’t you just accept that I’m with you because I want to be? You don’t see yourself how I see you, Derek. I don’t see myself how you obviously see me. I don’t see what’s keeping you here, but there has to be something. Same goes for you.”

Derek finally looks up at Stiles, his face still upset. “But why aren’t you telling me?”

“Because you could get seriously hurt if I do,” Stiles whispers brokenly, staring at the steering wheel instead of at Derek. “Someone told me that if I tell you what I know, that they will hurt you. I know what this person is capable of, Der, and I can’t stand the thought of you getting hurt.”

Stiles looks up when he feels a hand on his thigh. He looks down at Derek’s hand and rests his hand on top of it, lacing their fingers together. “You can’t always protect me, Stiles,” Derek whispers.

“I can damn well try,” Stiles says in a hard voice. “Now, come on. Let’s go do some magic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And you guys are wonderful <3 All of your comments are what keeps me going(:


	9. Some Deed Left Undone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's pretty wordy in this chapter. Not a lot of action, but that will be changing soon!  
> As always, feel free to come befriend me via tumblr. http://calmdown-sourwolf.tumblr.com/

“Dude, where have you been?” Scott asks, storming into the Stilinski house.

Stiles is frowning at all the books in front of him. He needs to figure out exactly what Peter and Jennifer are up to. He knows it is going to somehow end with Peter becoming an alpha and Jennifer having all of her powers again. But _how?_

“Hey, buddy,” Stiles calls out, not looking up from the books. “You heard about Jennifer?”

“Yeah, from Laura.” And uh-oh. Scott is upset. Ugh. Stiles doesn’t have time for his best friend to be upset. He just took care of his boyfriend being upset. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I had to go see Deaton like ASAP,” he answers before looking up at Scott. “Then I called you because there’s a lot I need to catch you up on.”

Scott sits next to Stiles. “You smell a lot like Derek and Laura. What’s going on?”

Stiles takes a deep breath and tells Scott everything. Well not _everything_ , but he tells his alpha about Derek being his mate and then starts talking about how he wants to be in both packs, leading him to look at Scott hopefully. Hoping his friend won’t be offended or anything.

Scott just sighs. “It’s better than you just leaving me for them like Lydia did.”

“Hey,” Stiles says, trying to comfort his best friend. “Lydia had her reasons. She did. Did you really think she was going to work out in our pack? She is much too stubborn to take orders like the rest of us.”

“You’re pretty stubborn,” Scotts says pointedly. “And you’re going to be taking orders from two alphas.”

“Dude, I know.” Stiles laughs, but he knows that’s not exactly how it’s going to be because every order Laura gives is partially Stiles’ doing. Not that he completely controls Laura, but they have an agreement. They work well together, better than Stiles would think. He made the right decision. He really did.

“So have they found Cora?” Scott asks, honestly worried about her.

Stiles shakes his head because that’s the truth because Derek and Laura have no idea where Cora is. That’s not saying anything about what Stiles knows.

“So you and Derek?” Scott says, leaning his head slightly. “I guess I can see it. I really never thought about it, though.”

“I tried not to,” Stiles laughs, leaning his head against the back of the couch. “Yeah, me and Derek. Weird, huh?”

“Not really,” Scott answers. “As long as he makes you happy, dude. If he hurts you, though I’m gonna kick his ass like the true alpha I am.”

Stiles barks out a laugh at that and patting Scott on the shoulder. “Thanks, bro. You’re still my best friend. You always will be. And you’re still my alpha.”

“Co-alpha,” Scott jokes with a snort.

“Thank all the deities that Jackson isn’t my other alpha,” Stiles jokes, cringing at the thought. “Ugh. We would all call him Alpha Douche behind his back.”

Scott frowns at that and gives Stiles a look. “What do you guys call me behind my back?”

Stiles smiles. “Now where’s the fun in that?” Not that they have actually figured out a nickname for Scott yet. Or Laura. This is something they really need to work on once Cora is saved and Peter is dead. Permanently this time.

Then Stiles gets a brilliant idea, a grin spreading across his face. Lydia. He is definitely going to need Lydia’s help. Not that she’s physically the best fighter (probably better than Stiles), but she could definitely help Stiles figure this out. She’s wicked smart. Genius. With her help, Stiles can probably figure out Peter’s plan by the end of the night.

**_To: Lydia (19:43): Can you come over? I need your help with a project._ **

**_From: Lydia (19:43): Ugh fine, but it better be good. You interrupted something very important._ **

**_To: Lydia (19:43): I promise this is way more important to your pack._ **

**_From: Lydia (19:44): Be there in 15._ **

“Alright, buddy. I’m gonna do homework. Want to stick around?” Stiles is really hoping that Scott will say no because when do Scott and Stiles ever do homework together? Never.

“Nah, you distract me too much,” Scott answers, shaking his head. “Plus, Isaac said he’s going to help me with history.”

Stiles hides his annoyance at that. No one is better at history than Stiles. Why the fuck is Isaac giving Scott help? _Maybe because you’re too busy_ a voice whispers in his head, and okay. Yeah, that’s probably it actually. Still. Scott didn’t even ask Stiles.

“See you later,” Scott says as he walks out the door.

“Bye,” Stiles says in his normal voice, knowing Scott can hear him. Then he books it to the kitchen, pulling out all of his and Lydia’s favorite research snacks. Most of which are just baked cheese crackers like Goldfish or Cheez-Its. He spreads them across the floor with cans of soda littering the floor along with two cups of ice. There’s already coffee brewing because this is going to be a long night.

So of course Lydia arrives just as Stiles gets a text from Derek.

**_From: Boymate (20:13): My place or yours?_ **

**_To: Boymate (20:13): Cramming session with Lydia tonight. Just go to sleep. I’ll call you if I need you._ **

**_From: Boymate (20:13): Let me know if you want me to come over._ **

**_To: Boymate (20:13): Will do._ **

“Is that the boyfriend?” Lydia asks, sitting gracefully on the floor in front of the coffee table next to Stiles. She has her backpack, her hair is up, and she is wearing yoga pants with a loose tank top. She’s ready to get down to business.

“Yep,” he says with a sigh. “Can I just say you’re my absolute favorite person right now?”

She cocks an eyebrow. “Right now?” She reaches for a can of Fresca and pours it in a cup of ice, watching it fizz up.

“Fine. All the time. What did I interrupt?” he asks instead, reaching for a can of Mountain Dew for himself. He now keeps all of the pack’s favorite sodas stashed in his house.

“Aiden was over,” she says with a shrug. “We were about to have sex, but your text seemed pretty urgent.”

Stiles just beams at her. “I’m honored that you ditched your fuckbuddy for me. Seriously, Lyds. It means a lot, and this is actually super important.” Then he goes into detail about the entire situation.

“Fucking Peter,” Lydia says under breath, taking a sip of her drink. “Jennifer is back?”

Stiles nods. “She’s in my Calc substitute. It’s fucking crazy, Lydia. She just acts so nice. I don’t understand.”

She grimaces. “I feel like Derek should work with them that way all of the people who have ever tried to kill me are working together.”

Stiles rolls his eyes. “Peter didn’t try to kill you.”

“He tried to turn me,” she adds, her voice hard. “I could’ve died.”

Stiles just stares at her for a moment before resting his hand on her cheek. “But you didn’t, which I will never stop being happy about. Because we need you. Your genius brain is what is going to help me figure out how to stop Jennifer and Peter from killing Laura and Cora.”

“And you,” she adds. “Don’t think I missed that part, Stiles. They need for your spark or whatever. You’re the most important piece.”

Stiles hunches back, resting against the couch and nods. “I know, which is why I need to figure this out because Peter is going to kidnap me soon. Like, I think tomorrow. Jennifer was my warning sign, I think. I need to have a plan before he gets me.”

“What did you learn at Deaton’s today?” she asks.

“We did a lot of work with mountain ash,” Stiles tells her, pulling his jar of mountain ash out of his backpack. “There’s a lot more to it than just a protective circle. Like, seriously. If I wanted to, I could use this shit as poison. It basically does whatever the caster wants it to as long as the caster _believes_.” What he doesn't tell Lydia is that they did a lot more today, but he doesn't say that because he can't exactly remember what they did.

Lydia snorts. “You’re a Disney princess, Stiles.”

He laughs at that, shaking his head and wondering exactly how he got to this place with Lydia. The friendly teasing and her dropping everything to come help him. Just a month ago, he was still completely in love with her. “If you start calling me Princess Stiles, you will never be allowed within ten feet of me again,” he tells her seriously. “Mountain ash isn’t just against supernatural creatures.”

She rolls her eyes at his empty threats and grabs a book as she starts reading. “Stiles, be a dear and grab me a straw. I know you bought some.”

He groans and gets up to grab one for her and himself. Why not? Straws are great, and he did not just buy them because Lydia asked him to. He bought them because he also likes straws. It wasn’t just Lydia. Pinky promise.

They continue like this for a few hours, just pouring over the books for information. Stiles takes out his laptop and starts taking notes on it. Lydia takes it a few times and puts in her own notes as well as adding comments in Stiles’.

“Mountain ash is important in their ritual,” Lydia says, the first thing either of them have said in the last two hours. “They think they’ll be able to trap their sacrifices.”

“Two werewolves and a spark?” he says, confused. “There has to be more. I know sacrifices are usually in three, but why two of the same thing? Or why am I the outlier?”

Lydia shakes her head. “You’re thinking about it wrong. It’s an alpha, a werewolf, and a spark. All three from the same pack.”

“Mountain ash won’t be able to trap me,” he says, thinking of something else. “Jennifer should know that.”

“Maybe she plans on using something else against you?” Lydia theorizes. “But what…?”

Stiles bites his lip, also trying to figure it out. Then it comes to him. “Mistletoe. That’s what we used against her, and I’m basically the same as her without being so evil or horrifically slashed up.”

Lydia frowns and picks up a book, leafing through it like she knows exactly what she’s looking for. She stops on a page as she reads through it, nodding to herself. “But she won’t use mistletoe against you,” she whispers to herself. “That’s like against your nature to use it as a weapon.”

“But she wouldn’t be using it as a weapon,” Stiles says, his mind slowly working through it. “She could use it as a shield, like she’s protecting me from the outside world. She probably thinks that using me as a sacrifice should be an honor for me. Peter as an alpha to her is a good idea.”

Lydia shivers at that. “I’m so glad he stopped being an alpha once I was involved in all this supernatural shit.”

Stiles is still frowning, though. He needs a plan. “How do you think she came back?” he asks.

Lydia frowns at him. “Why is that important?”

“Where did she get the power to come back? That could be really important to all of this.”

“Why didn’t Boyd and Erica come back if the nemeton was trying to bring back the peace?” she asks.

“I already figured that out,” he dismisses with a wave of his hand. “They didn’t die at the nemeton. The nemeton brought back all of the sacrifices and deaths that gave it power. Laura came back because Peter stupidly killed her right next to the nemeton, which gave it just a touch of power because she was an alpha. All of the sacrifices were to give power to the nemeton, so after Jennifer died, the nemeton used that power to bring them all back because it knew that all of those deaths disrupted some kind of balance.”

Lydia is frowning again. “That is one smart tree root.”

“But how is Jennifer alive?” Stiles asks again unsure of who he’s really asking. He is looking through books again, trying to find anything that even slightly mentions the nemeton because _how is she alive?_

“Do you think maybe she never died?” Lydia asks, thinking out loud.

“Then how would the nemeton have enough power to bring back the sacrifices?” he responds, frowning at the useless books. Why is there nothing on the nemeton? Like at all. Shouldn’t that be something important enough to have documented? Or maybe…it’s _too_ important to have documented.

“Lydia, how did you bring Peter back?” Stiles asks.

She shrugs. “I was possessed at the time. I have no idea what I was doing. I just know it involved the power of the full moon and Derek.”

Stiles is about an inch away from just banging his head on the table repeatedly. Maybe he could beat the answers out of his answer. That could work, right? He feels like just knowing how Jennifer was brought back would solve everything. He could figure out everything after that. It’s just that one piece that’s missing.

“Lydia, how do we know if Cora is still alive?” he finally asks, hating that he is asking.

“Wouldn’t Laura or Derek feel it if she wasn’t?”

He’s getting really tired of their conversation just being question after question. “What if Jennifer has her power again? What if she is blocking out their senses to make them think Cora is still alive?”

“Fuck, Stiles,” Lydia groans, rubbing her temples. “This is really confusing. Why did you drag me into this?”

“Because no one would be able to keep up with me like you are,” he easily replies because it’s so true. If he was having this night with anyone else, they’d just be staring at him like he’s crazy. Not Lydia.

Then Lydia is frowning again, a calculating look in her eyes like she’s figuring something out. “Stiles, Derek used his alpha powers to heal, Cora, right? Jennifer claimed she was the only one who could help him heal her, but what if was her plan all along to have Derek do it? Like, her plan B in case something happened to her.”

“Like she was putting the power in Cora that she might need later,” Stiles says slowly, trying to catch up with Lydia. “She knew that after breaking Derek’s trust like she did, he would never help her, but she could easily kidnap Cora. Or someone close to Cora could kidnap her.”

“And who is the only person that close to Cora who would be willingly to kidnap her and use her as a sacrifice?” Lydia asks.

“Peter.” Stiles will never stop being surprised at how horrible Peter is. “And who is the only person willing and powerful enough to use Laura as a ritual to give Peter the alpha powers back?”

“Jennifer,” Lydia answers, shaking her head. “He wants them to be permanent this time.”

“And to make them permanent, he needs more power put into the ritual,” Stiles whispers.

“And that’s where you come in.” Lydia has it all figured out now.

“Fuck,” Stiles whispers, pulling his legs up to his chest and putting his forehead on his knees. “Of course, I’m part of an evil ritual to help Peter become more powerful. I still don’t get it. Why is Jennifer helping? She already got her revenge.”

“Power,” Lydia answers softly. “It’s always about power, and it will always be about power.”

Stiles cringes at that, thinking back to when Derek accused him of wanting to be with Laura for her power. That wasn’t exactly the best feeling he’s ever had, and now here his is, about to become a pawn in someone’s game to become more powerful. “What are our lives, Lydia?” Stiles bemoans.

But Lydia doesn’t answer. Stiles’ head shoots up, but Lydia is gone. What the fuck? Where did Lydia go?

Shit. He’s not ready for this. He hasn’t helped Laura plan anything yet. No. Peter is early.

“You figured it all out, Stiles,” the creepy wolf says with a smile. “I’m impressed how short of a time that was. Also, I’m impressed that you didn’t tell Derek. I really rather hoped you would. He is so much fun to play with.”

Stiles just glares at him, knowing he doesn’t look all that scary. “Why do you like torturing your family? Haven’t they been through enough?”

Peter just shrugs at that, not caring at all about what his family has been through. “What does family matter when I can have the power to do whatever I want?”

Stiles just shakes his head. “Life isn’t all about power, Peter.”

The man laughs and rolls his eyes. “You’re so naïve, Stiles. Of course, it’s all about power. That’s all anyone wants. You may have seen a lot more than most seventeen year olds, but you still believe that there are some good in people. Humans are naturally evil, Stiles. That’s just a fact of nature.”

Stiles refuses to believe that, though. Not everyone is evil. Not everyone is good, but there are still some good people out there. “What are you waiting for, Peter?” he asks. “Aren’t you going to take me now?”

He laughs. “No, I came to take Lydia,” he says slowly. “She knows too much now. You should have just figured this out on your own. I’ll see you on the full moon, though.”

Then he’s gone.

Stiles’ hands are shaking as he pulls out his phone and dials the first person he can think to call right now.

“Stiles? Are you okay?” Derek’s voice is worried, but it’s calming.

“You. Here. Now.” Stiles can’t say much, but he hopes the message got across to Derek.

“I’m on my way,” aka _message received_. All Stiles has to do is wait.

Time stops. Or at least it feels like that. Or maybe it just speeds by faster than the speed of light because the next thing he knows, Derek’s face is all Stiles’ can see.

“Stiles, I need you to calm down and tell me what happened.”

Stiles hears the words. He knows what they mean, but he can’t get any words out as he just stares at Derek’s face pleadingly. Because Stiles can’t fix this like he originally thought he could. Stiles is yet again useless, powerless.

Huh. Maybe it is all about power. Fucking Peter.

Stiles closes his eyes once more, taking a deep breath before finding the words to speak. “Peter took Lydia,” he whispers brokenly. “He took Cora. He is working with Jennifer. And he is going to kill Lydia.”

“Why is he killing Lydia?” Derek asks. “Why did he take Cora?”

“Lydia helped me figure it all out,” Stiles tells him, looking back into the man’s eyes. “I’ve known Peter took Cora this whole time, Derek. That’s what I told Cora that you don’t know. That’s what I was hiding.”

“Why did you hide that from me?” Derek seems angry, but Stiles has no idea if it’s directed at him or Peter.

“Because I know you, Derek. You would’ve stormed up to him and demanded that he return her. But if you did that, Peter would know I told you, and he threatened to hurt you if I told you.” And at that, Stiles realizes, he has more power than he thinks. He shouldn’t have to be taking threats from Peter. Stiles has fucking _magic_ , okay?

“Stiles?” Derek asks hesitantly, probably seeing the sudden change in Stiles’ demeanor.

“I’m not the victim anymore,” he says slowly, testing it out as he stands up. He takes a deep breath, straightening his back. “I’m not the fucking victim anymore, Derek. I can fight back now. I’m not useless.”

“You were never useless,” Derek throws in.

Stiles throws him a look, watching the man stand up. “I was in a fight, but now? After what Deaton taught me? You were there. You _saw_ it. Dude, I can manipulate elements. I’m the fucking Avatar, and no, you won’t get that reference. I mean, I’m still kinda unstable, but…” He looks up at Derek hopefully, waiting.

“But you have me,” Derek adds softly. “You have me to anchor you and protect you.”

Stiles smiles at him, no longer feeling hopeless. “As long as you let me protect you too.”

“Okay, but no more hiding stuff. If someone threatens you, I need to know.” Derek’s hands land on Stiles’ shoulder, bringing him closer. “I need to know so we can work together to figure it out. That’s what we do.”

“God, it’s like we’re in a relationship or something,” Stiles scoffs, but he’s slowly relaxing. “Call Laura. I’m calling Scott. We’re gonna get Lydia and Cora back. Tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I haven't really talked about Stiles' magic quite yet, but I will definitely get into more detail about it next chapter. For sure. Thank you for reading! Your comments motivate me to keep going. You're all great (:


	10. I Am Not Crumbling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really didn't expect it to turn out this long, but there's still a lot more to come.  
> The scene in italics means it was in the past. I think I might start putting exerpts from the past in so yeah.

_“Remember to breathe, Stiles.”_

_“Right, Doc. I’ll get right on that.” He takes a deep breath, trying not to freak out with the prolonged darkness of keeping his eyes closed._

_“Focus on warmth.”_

_So Stiles pictures a fire, the sun, a bright summer day and laying out in the sun. He pictures summer and the sweet freedom of school. The many times he and Scott broke into their neighbors’ yards to go swimming in their pools since neither of the boys had their own. He pictures the nights they spent in the woods around a bon fire and just enjoying the warmth of the hearth while reminiscing or just sitting in silence._

_“Stiles, open your eyes,” a new voice says, so Stiles follows the direction._

_“Holy shit!” Stiles’ hands_ are on fire _. Why is that not concerning anyone else? “Wait. This is all me, isn’t it? I just fucking conjured fire.”_

_Derek rolls his eyes at that, but if Stiles didn’t know better, he would say that Derek looks proud. Derek is proud of Stiles. That’s his life now. His boyfriend/mate is proud of him because he can conjure fire._

_“Can I do anything else?” Stiles asks._

_Then Derek frowns. “You don’t remember the rest?” he asks._

_Then Stiles’ face falls. “I remember Deaton saying that I might not be able to remember some of the day. How much else have I done?”_

_“You controlled each of the elements,” Deaton tells him. “Fire was the last test.”_

_“So I have magic?” Stiles asks, and Deaton nods once._

_“You have magic.”_

Glancing at the time on his phone, Stiles discovers that rescuing Lydia and Cora tonight may not actually be possible tonight since it’s four in the morning. And he has school in four hours. As important as saving people’s lives is, Stiles’ dad has yet to see that as a decent excuse to skip school.

The Sheriff doesn’t exactly see why his son has to be so involved in everything when he isn’t a supernatural being. Stiles wishes he could see, though. If anyone is going to understand why Stiles does what he does, it’s his father.

But hey. Now Stiles is a supernatural being. He has reasons for being involved in all of this stuff. He’s not just a powerless human anymore.

So when Stiles’ dad texts him back that he absolutely cannot skip school today or else he will be grounded, he has listen to his father. He bemoans this to Derek, who just shrugs and says, “He’s right. You need to go to school. Show Peter and Jennifer that you’re not scared. Laura and I will plan out everything while you guys are at school.”

Stiles just narrows his eyes at the man. “I need to be a part of the planning process. This whole thing is going to end in _me_ being sacrificed.”

“No, this whole thing is going to end in saving our pack,” Derek retorts.

Okay, Stiles has to give him points for that one. That was good, but instead of admitting that, Stiles just throws himself into his boyfriend’s arms, burying his face into the man’s neck. “We still have a few hours until I have to go to school,” he whispers.

“You should sleep,” Derek tells him.

Stiles scoffs at that. “Like I could sleep right now. Even if we pretend I haven’t had three cups of coffee and five cans of Mountain Dew, I can’t be wasting time right now sleeping. I need to figure it out and save my packmates and warn Laura.” Which means he is pulling away from Derek (quite reluctantly he might add) and going back to his books. “Have you called Laura yet?”

Derek gives him a dry with shaking his head. “I’ve been talking to you. I’ll call her now. Do you want her to come over?”

Stiles nods eagerly. “It’ll be much easier to discuss all of this in person.” He is pouring over the words, but Laura won’t be there for another fifteen minutes at least. “Derek, we need to talk about what happened yesterday at Deaton’s.”

“Okay,” the man says with a sigh and sits on the ground next to Stiles, looking him in the eye. “You’re the best with air, but they only way for you to control it is your emotions.”

“What made it the most powerful?” Stiles asks.

Derek just shrugs. “You weren’t necessarily all that powerful yesterday. You could only do flickers of each, but Deaton says that with strong emotions they will manifest more powerfully.”

Stiles narrows his eyes with a frown. He thought he would be more powerful than this, but he can’t deal with it. He has read a lot, and they all say the same thing that Deaton had said. He needs to learn how to connect his emotions to each element. So he pulls out his laptop and starts taking notes as he interrogates Derek. “You can smell emotions, can’t you?” Stiles asks.

Derek nods, so Stiles keeps going. “I need you to tell me exactly what you smelled each time anything happened. From me.”

Derek closes his eyes, focusing on his interrogation. They’re both concentrating on the conversation that they don’t notice Laura coming in until she sits on the couch. Stiles gives her a nod, but he is waiting for Derek to talk, fingers hovering over the keyboard.

“There was a breeze, and you smelled like…I don’t know how to describe it. Free, I guess. I’m not sure what you were thinking, but I think it may have been about your mom because you had a tinge of sadness with it. The sink randomly turned on when you started smelling like…I don’t know, Stiles. This a lot harder than you think it is.” His eyes are open again to give his mate a dark look.

Stiles just shrugs as he types it out stuff. “I’m sorry, Derek, but I don’t remember at all. I need to know this stuff. Otherwise, you guys are going to go in guns blazing without me.”

“You’re not coming,” Derek argues.

Stiles’ head snaps up at that to glare at his boymate. “Fuck you,” he spits out. “Lydia is my best friend. I’m going with you, and you can’t stop me. I will figure out how to use one of my powers against you if I have to, Derek, because I’m going.”

“Laura,” Derek pleads, looking up at his alpha.

“I have no idea what’s going on,” she says with a shrug. “But I agree with Stiles. He needs to come.”

“Yeah,” Stiles says, throwing a smug grin at Derek. “I’m the only one who knows where the nemeton is.”

Derek looks pissed, but he needs to fucking deal with it because there is no chance in hell that Stiles is sitting this one out. He can at least manipulate fire. He’ll figure out the rest later.

“Der, can you explain everything to her?” Stiles asks, moving on from their disagreement. There are bigger things at hand right now. “I’m going to try to practice.” He tunes out their conversation, thinking about air and freedom. He imagines how free his mom seemed. She was always relaxed and never seemed stressed about what to say or what to do. She would around with this light air about her. Whenever she was around Stiles, everything bad seemed to melt away until he felt so light that he could fly.

“Well, that’s pretty cool,” Laura interrupts his thoughts.

He opens his eyes to see the curtain billowing and Laura’s hair whipping around in the wind. Even Derek’s hair was moving slightly, but he has a light in his eye that Stiles thinks means that he is proud of Stiles.

“Two down,” Stiles mumbles, watching the air move around him, and he focuses on changing the direction of it. Just with that thought, the wind automatically starts blowing the opposite way. Thinking harder, Stiles makes the wind speed up then he makes it all stop. His eyes narrow as he focuses on Derek, who then gets a blast of air in his face until he falls over on the floor.

Laura and Stiles are laughing as Derek sits himself up, glaring at both of them. “That wasn’t funny,” he mumbles.

“You had it coming,” Laura says in between laughs.

Stiles is laughing too much to say anything, and Derek’s glare is just making it that much funnier. But then he sobers up with a deep breath. “Okay, we need to plan now. Peter wants to kill Lydia. Not sacrifice her. Just plain kill, so there’s no stopping him from having already done it.”

Laura frowns at that. “No, he likes to be dramatic about it. He’s going to wait at least a day. Consider it him testing you. He wants to see what you will do because I think he is under the impression that you and Lydia are together.” Which Stiles actually agrees with. Peter may know that Stiles and Derek are mates, but anyone who knows the two of them knows they are too damn stubborn and fucked up to make a move on each other. Or so they think.

Derek doesn’t look happy about that, but it’s nothing Stiles can’t fix right now, so instead of saying anything, he just reaches over and grabs his werewolf’s hand, threading their fingers. “I still want to save her, you know, _before_ she dies,” Stiles mumbles, looking down. “Cora once said that we always come in too late and just find the bodies. We need to prove her wrong.”

Laura sighs, scratching at her forehead as she looks down. “You need to go to school, Stiles. Prove Peter wrong. Show him that you’re strong enough for this. He won’t expect you to be there.”

Stiles wants to growl at them and force them to go get Lydia now, but he knows it won’t work. Both of them have this set look to them like they aren’t going to take any of his shit right now. Huh. Maybe the Hales should compare notes on that look with his dad because they all have it down solid.

“Fine, I’ll go to school.” He isn’t actually super happy with admitting defeat, but what else can he do at this point? “I’m going to see if I can get anything out of Jennifer.”

Derek’s eyes flash. “Stiles, she’s dangerous.”

“I know that,” Stiles snaps back. “I’m not going to sit there and taunt her. I’m not an idiot as you like to think. I’m just going to see if she will freely admit anything. Anyway, meet me at school at one.”

“School doesn’t end until three,” Derek says with a frown.

Stiles rolls his eyes. “I have two free periods because I tested out of a few of my classes. I promise it’s not skipping. It’s all completely legit.”

Derek still looks slightly suspicious, but he finally agrees. So then they talk about what they’re going to do when they find the nemeton. All of it is making Stiles fidget in anticipation. School is going to be hell today.

 

“Stiles, you okay?” Scott asks when Stiles accidentally sends his pencil flying for the third time. Finstock glares at the two of them as the latter leans over to pick the pencil off the ground.

“Sorry. Got a lot on my mind,” he says under his breath, knowing Scott will hear him. He starts to explain everything, which at least keeps him from flinging his pencil again. But now Scott knows.

“Why aren’t we finding her now?” he demands.

Stiles shrugs. “Laura thinks we should wait, and as much as I really don’t want to, I agree with her. I need to show Peter that I’m stronger than he thinks I am.”

“But Lydia could be dead,” Scott points out.

Stiles shakes his head. “Peter won’t kill her yet. He is testing me, and you know what? I’m going to pass the test with flying colors.”

“Yeah?” Scott asks. “How, Stiles?” It’s not that Scott underestimates Stiles, he just knows his best friend’s limitations. Or at least he thinks he does.

Stiles just frowns in concentration, looking over at Greenberg’s desk before all of the papers fall to the floor with Coach shouting, “Damn it, Greenberg! You can’t even keep your papers on your desk? No, stop. Don’t say anything. There is literally no excuse for that; it shouldn’t even be possible to be that uncoordinated. Why are you even on the lacrosse team?”

Scott is just staring at the papers then back at Stiles. “Did you just do that?”

Stiles nods once, looking over at the papers and as Greenberg’s fingers brush against a page, Stiles moves it just out of reach. Coach is on another rant about the uncoordinated lacrosse players.

“Seriously. Who made you think it was a good idea to try out for lacrosse?” Coach shouts.

Scott is frowning again as he studies Stiles. “Dude, what the fuck?”

Stiles shrugs. “It’s something I learned with Deaton. Remember how I could use the mountain ash? That I had a spark? Turns out, it’s a little bit more than that. I’m not exactly sure of the technical parts of it because I, um, kind of don’t remember much of yesterday.”

“You blacked out?” Scott asks, suddenly worried.

Stiles shakes his head because a worried alpha is a kind of a problem in Stiles’ book. Maybe he should write a book about alphas. The Do’s and Don’t’s. “I just don’t remember it. I don’t know. Guess the magic just kind of took over my body and my brain couldn’t keep up? I don’t know. Ask Derek. He remembers more than I do.”

“Derek?” Scott’s eyes flash at that.

“Oh, yeah. We’re, um, dating now. Like it’s pretty serious. It’s not just the knowledge that we’re mates, but that we are admitting that we’re definitely into each other and yeah.” Stiles totally forgot to tell his best friend that he has a boyfriend. In Stiles’ defense, he has kind of been overwhelmed with the whole sacrificing thing starting up again.

“You. And. Derek,” Scott says like he doesn’t want to believe. “Why.”

“You knew I had feelings,” Stiles points out because he’s kind of mad. Scott should totally be excited for him. Not even a “Congrats, Stiles. Apparently you are attractive to gay guys.” Nope. Nothing. “Did you not think that Derek could ever like me back?”

Scott gives him a look. “You know that’s not it.”

“Then what is it?” Stiles demands. “Derek’s not good enough for me? Fuck that, okay. I can decide myself who is or isn’t good enough for me.”

“Does your dad know?” Scott counters.

“He has suspicions,” Stiles admits. “But he is completely okay with it.”

Scott just groans. “ _Mates_ ,” he says like it’s the worst thing to have happened in his life. “I just want you to be happy, Stiles, but why does the world hates us? Why does it have to be Derek?”

Stiles’ jaw tightens at that as he tries not to scream at his best friend. “Scott, you can’t say this shit to me,” he says, his voice deeper than usual. “He’s my mate. I’m getting all of these protective feelings over him from you saying that shit. So you just can’t. Because I know that I can’t take you in a fight.” Then a grin crosses his face slowly as he smiles at his alpha. “Not yet at least.”

Scott laughs, and suddenly, all the tension is gone, which is usually how it is between them. They get in a huge disagreement then Stiles cracks a joke, and it’s all over and forgotten with. Everyone is forgiven and they’re moving past it.

“I’ll get used to you and Derek,” Scott finally says with a sigh as the bell rings. “It’ll take a while, but I’ll get used to it.”

Stiles slings an arm over Scott’s shoulder and beams at him. “Thanks, Scotty. Still the best best friend ever.”

Scott laughs again, and for a moment, Stiles isn’t worried about what’s going to happen later today or the fact that his other best friend is in evil’s hands. Being in this moment with Scott right now makes him feel like he can do it.

“Hey, do you feel a slight breeze?” Scott asks, looking around at people’s hair dancing around.

“Oh, whoops,” Stiles says with a laugh and then the breeze is gone. “I’m still trying to work on it.”

“So what else can you do?”

Stiles shrugs. “Apparently, I can work with all the elements, but so far I can only semi-control fire and air.”

“Dude,” Scott says, stopping them at their lockers with a huge grin. “You’re like the Avatar.”

“Oh, my god,” Stiles says, tearing up slightly as he wraps his arms tightly around his best friend. “You made that reference. You. I can’t.”

“Stiles,” someone calls out, so Stiles peeks over Scott’s shoulder to see Danny. “You sure you’re not dating Scott?”

Stiles smiles at him and ruffles Scott’s hair. “Nah. Scott’s too good for me. I need someone who is at least equally as much of an asshole as myself.”

“I’m not even touching that innuendo,” Danny laughs, showing off his dimples.

“Good because I’m here and no,” Scott interjects as he pulls away from Stiles. “Wait. Danny knew before me?”

“Not technically,” Stiles says, grimacing. “You knew we were um…you know, before Danny.”

Danny is frowning at the two of them and sighs. “I’m getting really tired of not knowing what’s going on with everyone in this school. I swear, sometimes I think you’re all werewolves or some shit.”

Stiles and Scott freeze, staring at Danny, who is staring back at them confused then laughs. “Oh, my god. I was kidding,” he says, slapping Stiles on the shoulder. “Seriously, though? Werewolves? Yeah, like I’d believe that.”

Stiles just gulps and nods. “That’s hilarious. Yo, Scotty. Full moon is coming up, you feeling weird at all?”

Scott tries to laugh it off; he really does, but he’s just staring at Stiles like he is panicking. “Nothing out of the usual. My fangs keep popping out more often than usual.”

Danny laughs, rolling his eyes at them as he starts walking towards his class, but he turns around to arch an eyebrow at them. “Stiles, you coming to class?”

“Oh, yeah!” he says, remembering what time it is. He grabs his calculus textbook and waves his goodbye to Scott before following Danny to their classroom.

They sit down in their seats right before the bell rings. Jennifer walks in, acting completely normal. Stiles wonders if Jennifer knows Peter has Lydia. She probably does. She even tried to kill Lydia once for knowing too much.

Jennifer – ahem, Ms. Blake – gives them busy work and allows them to work in partners, so Danny is working with Stiles.

“Do you think I’m stupid?” Danny randomly asks.

Stiles’ head shoots up to stare at him, confused. “Danny, I think you’re smarter than almost everyone in this school except for Lydia, and that includes the teachers.”

“Then why is no one telling me?” He looks pissed, and shit. Stiles doesn’t know how to handle this. “I know about the werewolves, Stiles. Really. It wasn’t that hard to figure out. You and Scott are the most subtle.”

“Fuck,” Stiles sighs, thumping his head on the desk. “How long?”

“About two weeks after Ethan and I started dating,” he answers. “I think the night of that concert? Where…you know. And your dad….”

Stiles nods, knowing exactly which night Danny is talking about. “Why haven’t you said anything?”

“Why haven’t you guys told me?” he snaps back. “Why did no one bother to mention that my boyfriend is a werewolf?”

“Because he’s an alpha,” Stiles answers simply. “It wasn’t our place to tell you. It’s Ethan’s. Ethan should tell you. Plus, if we told you, he would’ve probably eaten us or something equally horrible.”

“He’s not a bad guy,” Danny says softly.

Stiles looks up at him, thinking about it for a second before shaking his head. “Not anymore,” he agrees.

“So will you guys start including me on everything?” Danny asks, hopeful. “I think I want to be involved in this.”

“No, you don’t,” Stiles rushes to say. “Not that I’m not happy with my decisions, but it was a lot safer and better when I was blissfully ignorant of the monsters that go bump in the night. Because it’s not just werewolves out there. There are druids and…” He glances up at Miss Blake as she glances at him with a smile.

“Did you have a question, Stiles?” she asks. “I’m horrible at math, but I’m sure someone could help you if you need it.”

“Nah, I’m a lot smarter than people give me credit for,” he says, hoping she catches the subliminal message.

Judging by her smile, she receives the message. “No one underestimates your intelligence, Stiles, except for maybe you.”

“It’s a new age for me,” he replies. “I have gone through this whole self-discovery thing as of late. It’s a New Stiles.”

She smiles and nods. “Looking forward to meeting the new you.”

Then she goes to help another student, and Stiles sighs, his entire body relaxing again while Danny is frowning. “What the fuck was that?”

Stiles just shrugs. “As I said, Danny-boy, there’s a lot more than just werewolves out there. Scarier things than just werewolves.”

 

Stiles is driving to the nemeton with Laura following closely behind him in the Camaro with Derek in his passenger seat. “Derek,” Stiles says softly, “you may need to prepare for the worst.”

The man turns to look at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Have you thought about where Jennifer got the power to come back?” Stiles asks instead of answering straightforward.

“…no,” he admits.

“And that’s why I’m the researcher in this relationship, but think about it and get back to me.”

Derek is silent for about a minute, and he takes quicker than Stiles thought he would to figure it out. “Cora’s dead, isn’t she?” His voice is so broken like he’s already given up.

“As much as I wish that that isn’t a possibility…”

“Okay,” is all Derek says.

Stiles frowns and wants to say something, but they’re at the nemeton now. So they get out of the car, quietly moving through the deserted forest. There are two tents set up around the tree root now that the cellar is kind of nonexistent. That aluminum bat wouldn’t have held it up for forever.

They guessed right. Peter is alone, Jennifer still at school. Derek and Laura attack him, shifting into their beta forms with their fangs and claws coming out. Stiles takes a moment to observe the chaos before ducking into one of the tents, hoping it’s the one with Lydia.

It is. She looks up at Stiles with hope in her eyes and tears falling down her cheeks. Stiles kneels to remove the gag and cut the rope from her hands, his eyes avoiding the wounds she has on her wrists from trying to escape.

“Stiles,” she breathes out, her arms wrapping tightly around him. She’s clutching at him and will probably leave bruises, but Stiles doesn’t care. He is holding her just as tightly, tighter yet when he feels her tears on his shoulder.

“Come on,” he urges softly. “We have to go. We need to find Cora.”

She pales at that and nods. They stand up, Stiles supporting most of her weight as they walk out of the tent and into the other. Stiles freezes at the sight, feeling all of his blood drain because Cora is there alright.

But Cora’s dead.

Stiles gathers all of his strength, pulling Lydia away from the body to find Derek and Laura standing over Peter’s body. He is still alive, though. Because as much evil as he does, the Hale siblings will never be able to kill their last living relative.

Derek turns to look at Stiles, his head tilting slightly to see the look on his mate’s face and probably smell his emotion. Stiles just shakes his head and looks at Peter. He passes Lydia onto Laura and looks down at Peter. “Fuck you,” he says darkly. “Fuck you, Peter.”

Peter just looks up at him and smiles though his teeth are covered in his blood. “See you on the full moon, spark.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp...Yeah, I'm not sure what to say anymore.


	11. Lovers Never Sleep Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here is my apology chapter for killing Cora. I might actually earn my mature rating ;)

“Stiles!” a voice is shouting, but he’s not listening. No, he’s concentrating on the road because he needs to get home. Safe. Without crashing. Oh, god the blood. She was so pale. Cora. Dead. All Stiles can see now is her body, pale with wide eyes, asking why this happened to her.

“Pull the fucking car over right now!”

Stiles relents and does as Derek says, pulling his jeep to the side of the road. He shuts off the engine and jumps out of the car and into the trees. Then he is puking. Everything is coming out, his lunch, tears. Everything.

Derek rests his hand on Stiles’ neck until he’s done. Then Stiles stands back up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and looking at Derek. “I’m sorry,” he croaks out. “I shouldn’t be freaking out. It’s your sister. I should be taking care of you, not the other way around.”

Without a word, Derek pulls Stiles into him, both of them clutching onto each other like they have no one else in the entire world except for each other. Stiles knows tears are freely falling from his eyes, and he can feel wetness on his neck, which just breaks him down even further. Derek doesn’t do this. Derek doesn’t cry and let it out. Not in front of people at least.

And here Stiles is, experiencing this. Taking care of Derek and trying to comfort him. He runs his hand down his mate’s back, pressing his lips against his neck softly. Touch is the most comforting thing for werewolves. At least that’s what Stiles read. His touch will do more to soothe Derek right now than his words, which is why Stiles stays quiet until Derek starts conversation.

But that also leaves Stiles to his thoughts. He has never seen Derek this broken. Not since Boyd’s death and now that he thinks about it, his touch is what comforted Derek the most. How did he not see it then? But this is worse. So much worse. Because Derek thought he was getting his family back. Laura came back. Cora was coming back to Beacon Hills. Derek had hope, and Peter, his own _kin_ , just crushed it again.

So Stiles decides that he is going to bring Cora back. He has to. The nemeton cannot believe that her death brings balance. He will find a way because this isn’t okay. Derek isn’t okay, and Stiles isn’t sure that he will ever be after this.

Derek’s hands finally loosen from where they were clutching at Stiles’ shirt. He doesn’t move to pull away, but Stiles doesn’t want him to. Derek can stay exactly where he is for as long as he needs to. “Stiles,” he whispers, his voice rough from crying.

Stiles grips tighter. “I’m right here,” he says softly into Derek’s ear. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here.”

Derek nods against his neck, his lips softly caressing the skin there. “Thank you.”

“It’s time I paid you back for all of my panic attacks anyway,” Stiles says, trying to be light, but this isn’t exactly a happy-go-lucky time. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Derek says, his voice slightly muffled by Stiles’ neck.

“It’s not yours either,” Stiles quickly adds. “This is all on Peter, okay? You didn’t kill her. You didn’t have anything to do with this.”

“I made her come back here.”

“Fuck,” Stiles groans, closing his eyes. “Derek, listen to me carefully. You asked your sister to come home. If you or any of us thought for a second this is what would happen, we wouldn’t have even brought it up. In fact, we’d force her to stay the hell away from Beacon Hills. This. Isn’t. Your. Fault.”

Derek just sighs, his entire body just sinking into Stiles again.

“So, um,” Stiles says eloquently. “Do you think we could head back to your place? Holding you up in water for a few hours was hard, but this might be a little harder for me. I’m not that muscular.”

Derek nods and steps back, still holding onto Stiles’ waist as he looks up. “Yeah, let’s do that.”

Stiles steps closer and gives him a quick kiss before walking back to the jeep. “I’d give you more, but I did just puke so.”

The rest of the drive is silence, but Derek keeps his hand on Stiles’ thigh the entire time. And whenever Stiles can, his hand is resting on Derek’s, hoping that it shows that Stiles is really here for him. Like super right here.

They get back to the apartment, and Stiles immediately goes to brush his teeth. Derek moves behind him and turns on the shower. Once Stiles is done, he turns around, his hands moving underneath the werewolf’s shirt, pulling it up to see his smooth, healed skin. The shirt is ripped and bloody, though, so Stiles throws it in the direction of the trashcan.

He presses his lips to the perfect chest in front of him, his hands running over the smooth skin to unbutton Derek’s jeans.

“This isn’t glacial,” Derek whispers, but he almost looks amused. Stiles will take what he can get at this point.

“We need to be close right now,” Stiles whispers in response, pushing himself closer to Derek. “I’m not sure we’re ready to have sex, but we need to be close. You need me. I need you. You’re not alone anymore, Der.”

And that suddenly ignites something in the man because he is pulling up Stiles’ shirt like it offends him just being there. Then their lips are crashing together, frantically moving against each other as they search for this closeness, reminding each other that they’re not alone. Not anymore.

Before he knows, Stiles is naked with Derek, and it’s the first time he has ever done anything like this. No one has seen him naked except for his parents when he was a kid and went through a nudist phase. Luckily, that stage has passed.

He is uncomfortable for all of two seconds before Derek is ushering Stiles into the shower, his lips pressing against all the skin he can reach as he mumbles, “Don’t be nervous. You’re beautiful.”

“Nope. Stop right there.” Stiles is gasping in air as he gets the words out. “We cannot be doing this with those words. This can’t be some tender moment between us, okay. Just. No.”

Derek pulls back, eyebrows raised. “And why not?”

“Because I can’t handle anymore emotions or thoughts today,” Stiles answers, hands sliding along Derek’s chest. “I just want to be in your arms and pretend that sleeping is actually an option for us.”

Derek sighs and switches their positions to stand underneath the spray. Stiles can’t help but stares as the water falls down his bare chest. He goes to grab the soap, gathering is in his hands before letting them slide along Derek’s chest again, washing away the dried blood. They both ignore the way Stiles’ hands are shaking and the way Stiles refuses to look at Derek’s face.

The shower is finished quickly. Stiles doesn’t bother with clothes after drying off. He just walks to the bed and curls into a ball. “When we’re not so emotionally traumatized, we should definitely try that shower again,” Stiles says from his cocoon.  “But with dick-touching. I could be down with that. At a later date.”

Derek huffs out a laugh as he slides underneath the blankets, pulling Stiles close. The teenager sighs with the touch, nuzzling his face into Derek’s neck to pretend that nothing else exists outside of this bed. The weird thing is that Stiles actually does feel better. He can’t even begin to explain it, but just Derek’s touch, the feel of his warm skin on Stiles’ fingertips makes him feel safe, like nothing is wrong with the world if only just for a few minutes.

At least he has a few minutes to forget the Mt. Everest of problems that just keep piling up. Just a few minutes of enjoying being close to someone he loves, knowing they’re safe right here. Because nothing bad can happen to Derek if he is in Stiles’ arms, right?

Right.

But it’s only a few minutes until he starts thinking of the way Cora looked.

Cora’s _body_.

How Cora’s body looked. Her pale features, wide eyes, and the slash around her neck that Stiles just seemed to notice in his mind. God. Poor Cora. Poor Laura. Poor Derek.

Fucking poor Hales. All of them just need a hug except for Peter because he is fucking dickwad. Actually, Stiles doesn’t have any proper words that describe him aptly enough. Maybe Lydia might be able to find a few choice words, and whoa. Wait.

“How’s Lydia?” Stiles asks suddenly now that he actually thought of her. Shit. Three months ago, she’d be the first person he would ask about. No. Now it’s Derek.

Derek shrugs. “I think Laura took her,” he says with a sigh, closing his eyes. “I wasn’t paying much attention aside from checking that you were okay and then realizing that Cora is dead.”

Stiles just nods, tucking himself even closer to Derek. “We should take a minute to fully appreciate that my first thought today was to worry about you. Not Lydia.”

Derek’s chest moves with a soft laugh as his arms tighten around the teenager. “I replaced _the_ Lydia Martin?”

“That and so much more,” Stiles whispers against his mate’s skin. “I know words don’t mean a lot to you, Derek, but I want you to know that I love you more than I ever thought I did for Lydia. And from me, that’s actually saying a lot. You don’t have to say anything back; I just felt like you needed the words somewhere in your mind just to know that I’m still here to love you.”

Derek’s lips finds Stiles’ once more, and Stiles thinks for a moment that they should never stop kissing, like ever. But then Derek is licking into his mouth and all thought ceases. Their bodies move closer until Derek is hovering over Stiles, his forearms on either side of the teenager’s head as skin touches skin. Everything lights up between them as they move closer and closer until there are no empty spaces.

Stiles runs his hands down his mate’s back, his nails scratching lightly, which then makes Derek growl into his mouth, and _hello_. Stiles didn’t know he had that particular kink, but he does, and he is not ashamed of any of this because their lips and tongues are slightly moving against each other, making the blood rush down.

Derek pulls back to start sucking a mark on Stiles’ shoulder while Stiles just takes a breather because wow. He didn’t know kissing could be that thrilling, but apparently it is, and why aren’t they kissing like all the time? That should be a thing in Stiles’ life.

Then there are teeth scraping against Stiles’ skin and he can’t keep in the moan that escapes from his lips. Then he is pushing against Derek because this isn’t fair. He pushes the man over on his back so Stiles is hovering over him. He attaches his lips to the man’s neck, letting his tongue, teeth, and lips make their path down his neck, across his shoulders and down his chest. But the noise Derek makes when Stiles drags his teeth over his nipple. Man. He could listen to that sound _forever_.

“So, um, we’re not ready to have sex?” Stiles says, knowing he no longer sounds determined about remaining celibate because _that noise_. It was like a breathy whine, and it was beautiful. Stiles wants to find out every single thing that causes Derek to make that noise and if he can make more.

Derek is looking up at him, his eyes wide and dilated as he has a half-assed smirk curving his lips. “I’m ready for whatever you are.”

Stiles straightens up, sitting on Derek’s hips as he sighs. “Fuck you. That’s not fair. I have horrible impulse control.” Which is exactly Stiles’ excuse for running his hands over his boymate’s chest, feeling the hard muscles on smooth skin. It’s really not fair for him to be this sexy. Like it shouldn’t be allowed.

“Did you want me to sit here with this view of you on top of me and try to convince you not to have sex with me?” Derek asks dryly, and hey. At least he is feeling up to being the sarcastic fuck Stiles fell in love with.

“Fuck,” he groans, bending down to rest his forehead on Derek’s shoulder. His lips have a mind of their own as they caress the skin that Stiles can reach. “Can you just stop?”

“Stop what?” Derek asks softly even though Stiles can hear the smile in his voice as his hands run up his back. Not fair.

Stiles sits up abruptly, frowning down at the beautiful, naked man lying underneath him. Ugh. “This,” he says with a wave at Derek’s body. “It’s just too much for me.”

“What do you want me to do, Stiles?” Derek asks, and the sweet thing is that he genuinely looks like he wants to fix whatever this is.

Stiles sighs and presses his lips against his mate’s because that shit is addictive. No judgments. Like, how is everything about Derek so hard and so soft at the same time? Shouldn’t that be a paradox? Whatever. He can’t think about that right now because his dick has taken way too much interest in this heated make out session.

“Der, can I?” Stiles can’t finish as his hand slides down the man’s chest, stopping right at the patch of hair, his fingers running through it as he waits for permission.

“You don’t have to ask,” Derek says hoarsely. “I’m all yours.”

 _Fuck_. This man is going to be the death of Stiles, but he doesn’t care. He just really wants to touch Derek’s dick, and he is and _holy shit_. Stiles knew the man was hard, but the feel of someone else’s dick in his hand is great. Fantastic even because Stiles has only ever touched his own. As far as first experiences go, this one fucking rocks.

Since he doesn’t have to ask permission, Stiles kisses down Derek’s stomach and goes straight to his destination. It sounds weird, but Stiles has always wanted to give a blowjob. They look awesome to receive, and he wants to be like _really_ good at them one day, but he isn’t naïve; today is not that day. So instead, he tentatively licks up from the base to the tip. It’s dry and salty and _fantastic_.

But then Derek is making another noise, a mixture between a moan and a whine. Okay that’s Stiles’ new favorite noise. Stiles glances up and sees Derek staring down at him, intently watching everything and looking like he is trying really hard not to move, letting Stiles take the reins on this one. So Stiles goes back to licking, his hand holding the bottom loosely. He swirls his tongue around the tip and suddenly gets the courage (mainly from Derek’s noises) to take Derek in, seeing how far he can go without gagging.

He hollows out his cheeks, sucking slightly as he starts bobbing. He can’t go very far. _Yet_. And his jaw hurts, but he is determined to make this good for Derek. His hand moves in rhythm with his bobbing head to get what Stiles can’t take into his mouth.

Derek’s hands go into Stiles’ hair, and he is very thankful he finally decided to grow it out from the buzzcut because apparently hair pulling is another one of Stiles’ surprise kinks. But then Derek is pulling him up, saying, “I’m gonna.” But he can’t finish his sentence and damn. The man looks _wrecked_. And Stiles did that.

Fuck.

He jerks Derek off until there is come shooting from his dick, all over the werewolf’s stomach. Stiles can’t help but stare. Then, because Stiles is a curious little shit, he leans down and licks his mate’s stomach, just to know what it tastes like. Salty and kind of bitter, but it’s not the worst thing Stiles has had in his mouth.

He sits back up to stare down at Derek, who is flushed and looks relaxed like Stiles has never seen before. He reaches down, his fingers running over the man’s stubble then Derek is pulling him down for a kiss.

“Your turn,” he mumbles against Stiles’ lips, making his dick twitch at that because _yes please_.

Before he knows it, Stiles is on his back with Derek sitting on his hips. And isn’t that a nice look? Derek reaches over and grabs the tissues from his nightstand to wipe at his stomach. Stiles bets that having dried come on your stomach isn’t the best. But then his hands are on Stiles’ dick, and it’s basically the best thing that has ever happened to him. Ever.

He knows his moans are obnoxiously loud, but apparently, Derek likes his noises as much as Stiles likes his. What a pair they make. Then Derek’s mouth is on his dick, and Stiles has never been happier about being wrong because _this_ is the best thing ever.

He actually takes comfort in the fact that it feels like this is also Derek’s first time having a dick in his mouth. Not that it’s really hard to impress Stiles at this point. Plus, it’s _Derek_. If Derek is touching him, Stiles is perfectly happy.

The warm wetness of Derek’s mouth is too much, and embarrassingly soon, Stiles is giving him a warning. “I’m going to come.”

And he does. Hard. Harder than he ever has, and Derek is just sitting taking it all in, swallowing down all of the jizz. A little bit leaks out, slipping down his chin. And it shouldn’t be endearing, but it kind of is, and Stiles is okay with admitting that he is a little fucked up if it means he gets to have this memory for the rest of his life.

Derek wipes at his chin, sitting up and staring down at Stiles, who probably also looks wrecked if he goes by the smug look on his mate’s face. With an eye roll, he pulls Derek down him and kisses him.

“We’re not ready to have sex,” he repeats again with a soft laugh.

Derek rests his forehead against Stiles’, looking into his eyes. “Do you regret it?”

“Not even a little bit,” Stiles quickly answers with a smile and a peck to the lips hovering just over his. “That was hot. You’re hot. This was a brilliant idea.”

“I was hoping that you would be quiet in the afterglow,” Derek jokes with a small smile.

Stiles laughs. He isn’t under any impressions that what they just did and the words that he said have automatically fixed all of Derek’s sadness. It’s still there, but this is was a good distraction, a way to remind Derek that there still is good in the world even if it is just having great orgasms with Stiles. Stiles is totally down with that.

Derek pushes himself up off the bed, and Stiles is slightly ashamed to admit that he whined at that. “No, come back,” he whines.

Derek gives him a small smile as he ducks into the bathroom. He comes back out with a wet washcloth is wiping his stomach, and Stiles is watching with more focus than he has ever been able to give anything. Derek throws the rag back into the bathroom before crawling back into bed, back into Stiles’ arms. He tucks his head on the teenager’s chest while Stiles wraps his arms around him tightly.

Derek’s lips brush against his skin as he whispers, “I love you too.”

They lie in silence for an undetermined time, their hands caressing skin every now and again, Stiles’ fingers a constant presence in Derek’s hair. He stares out the window, watching the sun set and the room darkens slightly. Panic rises slightly, but then Derek is reaching across the bed to flick on the lamp. A smile spreads across Stiles’ face because this man, the man that used to threaten to kill Stiles on a daily basis, pushed him against walls, smashed his head against steering wheels. _This_ man is the sweetest person Stiles has ever met.

Stiles starts to get uncomfortable, so they switch on their positions with Derek on his back and Stiles sprawled on top of him. He nuzzles into the werewolf’s chest, feeling completely relaxed. Another long moment of time passes without either of them knowing how long. Stiles dozes on and off, but neither of them fall asleep.

Then Derek’s body tenses. Stiles looks up to see the man’s eyes trained on the door, so he looks at it as Laura and Lydia come walking in.

 _Shit_.

Stiles buries his face into Derek’s chest saying, “Nope. Not dealing with this right now. I refused to be ashamed to be caught naked with my _really hot_ boyfriend. Nope.”

Laura is laughing, and Lydia is probably smirking at the boys, but Stiles doesn’t know because he can’t see anything except for Derek’s chest.

“Why are you here?” Derek asks, trying to sound hard, but Stiles isn’t sure that he can use that tone of voice against his only sister ever again.

There’s silence, so Stiles looks up at the alpha, who just looks broken. Lydia isn’t looking much better. Then he looks down and sees their hands wrapped around each other tightly.

The sight is kind of breaking his heart. “How about Derek and I get pants on and we have pack snuggles?” Stiles offers.

Out of respect to mainly Stiles, the girls turn their backs as the boys get out of the bed. Stiles pulls a pair of underwear from his backpack and pulls on his pajama pants, not even bothering to put on a shirt. While they’re getting dressed, Laura opens a few windows and Lydia orders pizza.

“It smells like sex,” she tells them, but her tone of voice and face remain the same.

Derek gets another pair of sheets while Stiles takes off the soiled ones. He tries not to smile at that. He and Derek had sex.

They did that.

And it was great.

Stiles makes the bed while Derek throws the other set of sheets into the washer. Luckily, the comforter fell off the bed sometime during their shenanigans, so it’s still safe. Lydia toes off her shoes and pulls her hair back as she falls gracefully onto the couch. Stiles grabs the blanket and sits next to her, spreading the blanket over the two of them. He lifts his arm, wrapping around her shoulders, pulling her into him. She rests her head on his shoulder, her eyes closing like she just can’t handle it anymore.

Derek sits next to Stiles with Laura on his other side, and he just curls into her while Stiles places his hand on his mate’s knee. He needs his sister right now, but a mate’s touch always relaxes a werewolf. That’s what the books say.

Resting his head on top of Lydia’s, Stiles thinks about how he would have never expected any of this ever. Being close enough to Derek to not only be in a pack with him but to also be the one that calms him down when the man’s upset with just a touch of his hand. Then with Lydia curled into him like this. He wanted this so badly, but now it’s just so automatic and just overall comforting. The fact that Stiles is comforted by the touch of his pack. That’s a weird thing too since Stiles was never a touchy person. Now, he is.

He kisses the top of Lydia’s head when he hears the doorbell and stands up, grabbing his wallet from the table by the door that also has his keys. He practically lives here already. He opens the door, making sure the pizza guy can’t see much in the apartment because this is a private moment. Outsiders really aren’t welcomed.

He pays for the pizza and takes all three of them over to the coffee table, kicking the door closed behind him. He sets them and goes to grab napkins. No one moves, but they’re all staring at the food, looking slightly confused that life is still going on.

Carefully, he pulls Derek into a sitting position and hands him a slice of the meat lover’s pizza that Stiles knows is his boymate’s favorite. He presses a kiss to the man’s temple as he sits down, letting Laura and Lydia grab their own pizza before he reaches for a slice. He makes sure to check no Lydia’s wrists. They’re still red from the rope burn that was so bad it broke the skin. He winces at it, but at least that’s her only physical injury.

There’s no saying how her mind handled the hostage situation with Peter. She has never been okay around him and the kidnapping probably obliterated any progress that she may have made.

Stiles can feel eyes on the side of his face, so he looks up to see Derek watching him with a small frown as he chews. He glances at the pizza slice in Stiles’ hand then back to his face in a silent question. Stiles’ answer is to take a small bite on his pizza and chew slowly before leaning into Derek, his head on the man’s shoulder.

The pizza is eaten in silence. When they’re done, they still have an entire pizza untouched that would’ve been at least halfway gone on a normal day with two werewolves, a teenage boy, and a teenage girl, who eats like a teenage boy when no one is around. Apparently seeing the dead body of someone you care about really messes with your appetite. Or at least, Stiles theorizes.

Lydia clears her throat, the three of them look to her because this is the first time someone has talked in probably in over an hour. “There’s only two of you now,” she says softly.

Stiles frowns at her. “Two of who?” And he really hopes she doesn’t bring up there are now only two Hale siblings. Lydia should know that it’s way too soon for that.

Luckily, that isn’t the point she’s trying to make. “There’s only Laura and Stiles as the sacrifices now. They need a third.”

Then Stiles is frowning for an entirely different reason. “And they want the third to be from the same pack?”

Lydia nods once, and anger just courses through Stiles’ veins because that is not okay with him. Not even a little bit. He is not letting that happen.

“Stiles!” Lydia shouts at him. “Calm down!”

He looks and notices the empty pizza boxes flying around along with pieces of Lydia’s hair, her eyes squinting against the wind that is blowing through the apartment. “No,” he shouts back, standing up. “This isn’t going to happen. I won’t allow it.”

Derek stands in front of him, grabbing Stiles’ face. In the distance, he can hear glass breaking, but he is just focusing on his mate because _no_. “What are you talking about?” Derek asks, pleading. “What are the two of you talking about?”

“You’re the third sacrifice,” Stiles cries out, knowing tears are threatening to pour from his eyes. “And it’s not going to happen. No. They are not going to sacrifice my mate. They won’t know what hit them. I’m going to kill both of them before they can ever lay a hand on you.”

Derek’s face softens, his fingers catching the tears that fell. He pulls Stiles closer, kissing him so hard that it’s probably going to bruise, but Stiles doesn’t care. He just grabs Derek’s side, pulling him closer.

“That won’t happen,” Derek says softly, a soft whisper trying to comfort Stiles. “I’m not going to be sacrificed and neither will you or Laura. None of us, okay? We’re here. We’re safe. Remember, Stiles? We protect each other.”

Stiles nods against the hands caging his face, pressing a kiss to a palm. Slowly, the wind dies down, but it’s not completely gone yet. “Derek,” he croaks out.

“I’m here,” the man says before pulling Stiles into his chest. “I’m right here, Stiles. We’re safe.”

He breathes in his mate’s scent, feeling the anger subside along with the wind ceasing. “They can’t take you too,” he whispers, his voice cracking.

“No one can take me from you,” Derek tells him, voice hard with determination. “No one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um so that was the first time I've ever written any homosexual sex scenes sooo yeah. I hope it's not awful...


	12. We Thought it Ought to Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is kind of a filler chapter, but fluff! Yay!

“We only have a week until the full moon,” Stiles tells Derek the next day. He jumps out of the bed, shivering slightly at the cool air in the apartment as he finds his clothes. Apparently now that they have had sex, clothing is not allowed in the bed. Or something like that. Stiles isn’t exactly sure. He just knows that it’s almost the afternoon, and it should be time to get up.

The pack was up until dawn just comforting each other until Lydia and Laura left with each other. Stiles guessed they were going to the same place, and he was going to bring it up with Derek until the man in question start taking off Stiles’ clothes like he had a right too.

Okay, he does kind of have a right to because Stiles can’t say no to that. Stiles can’t say no to Derek. Period. End of sentence.

“I need to go back to Deaton’s,” Stiles tells the room, hoping Derek is awake enough to listen to him. “Which means your glorious ass needs to wake the fuck up.”

Suddenly there is a pillow flying through the air directly at Stiles’ head. “Hey!” the boy calls out. “You do _not_ want to mess with me. I can control air. I’m fucking badass. Remember last night?”

“You broke my dishes,” Derek grumbles. “Super impressive, Stiles. I’m shaking in fear.”

“You asshole,” Stiles mutters under his breath, jumping onto the bed. Well more specifically, jumping onto Derek’s back, his lips brushing the back of the man’s neck and then he bites down hard. “Take that back.”

“No,” the werewolf growls, but there’s a playful glint in his eyes as he looks over his shoulder at Stiles. A glint that Stiles has never seen, so he stops to look at it fully. That hesitation costs him, though, because then he is on his back with Derek sitting on his stomach, grabbing his wrists and holding them over his head. “Now who’s scared?” Derek asks, his eyes flashing blue.

Stiles just raises his eyebrow at that. “Do I smell scared?”

Derek’s eyes are still blue as he smirks. “Nope.”

Now he’s just playing with Stiles. He wants him to ask. Ugh. Fuck Derek for knowing him so well. “What do I smell like?” because he _has_ to ask. With that lead up? Has to.

Derek nuzzles into his neck, teeth grazing along the sensitive skin, making Stiles hips impulsively arch up. “You smell like arousal. You act like you are too.”

“Fuck you,” Stiles says with no heat as Derek sits back up to stare down at him.

“I win,” he says.

Stiles shakes his head. “I won because guess what? You’re awake now.” And with Derek’s slightly shocked look, he rolls out from underneath the man, taking his wrists with him. He stands up to smile at his mate, who is glaring at him while he just sits on his knees. “Come on, baby. We have stuff to do.”

“Apparently you didn’t think so when you skipped school,” Derek points out.

And shit. Stiles had forgotten about school and basically everything outside of the pack and Derek last night. He immediately goes to check his phone with a lot of missed calls and texts from his dad and Scott. The texts from his dad getting angrier as they go. He decides to tackle that problem first.

“Stiles,” the man practically growls into the phone. He may have been hanging out with werewolves too much

“Hey, Dad,” he says, scratching at the back of his neck.

“Please tell me you’re safe and sound so I can yell at you,” his dad says.

“Um, yeah. I’m at Derek’s, so, uh. Do you want to hear my excuses that are totally legit or just yell to get it out of your system?” Stiles looks up at the ceiling, holding in a groan because how the hell did he forget to keep his dad posted? He’s the worst son ever.

His dad groans over the phone. “Okay fine. Give me your _legit_ excuses.”

So Stiles tells his dad everything, still not exactly over the fact that he is allowed to tell his dad all of this. He goes from Cora’s disappearance to Lydia’s to their rescue mission to finding Cora’s body. “We all just really needed to be together last night,” Stiles says, his voice deep with sadness. “It’s a pack thing. The closer we are physically, the better we feel. We just really needed the night to heal.”

“Son, you practically live at Derek’s,” his dad says softly. “I’m sorry about Cora. I really am.”

“Me too.” Stiles is looking at his shoes when an arm wraps around his waist from behind. He leans back against Derek’s chest, his head leaning against the man’s shoulder. “And yeah, I know. I’ll come home today if you want. I have to go to Deaton’s, but after that we can have dinner together.”

“Bring Derek because there is no way you two aren’t dating now,” his dad tells him in his Sheriff Voice.

“Yeah, okay. We should probably talk about that. There’s a lot about that, but I really do need to go to Deaton’s.”

“And I need to get back to work now that I know my truant son is safe,” the Sheriff adds.

“Yeah. I’ll see you tonight. Get whatever you want. I owe you a dinner without denying you delicious foods. I love you, Dad.”

“Thanks. I love you too, Stiles. I’ll see you tonight. Seven?”

“Seven.” Then the line is dead, and Stiles slips his phone into his pocket, closing his eyes as he puts most of his weight on the human wall behind him. “I completely forgot about my dad. And Scott, I guess.”

Derek presses his lips on Stiles’ neck, his fingers sliding underneath the teenager’s shirt just for the skin on skin contact. “You should at least text Scott.”

“I really don’t want to,” Stiles moans, tucking his face into the man’s neck. “This is much more preferable.” He rests his hand on the hairy arm wrapped around his stomach while his other arm hands limply.

“Weren’t you the one trying to get me out of bed?” Derek asks, amused. “You seem to be wanting to head back into that direction.”

“What can I say?” Stiles says with a smirk as he opens his eyes to look up at Derek. “You do amazing things to my libido.”

Derek huffs out a laugh and turns Stiles around in his arms. “We need to go to Deaton’s.”

Stiles grabs Derek’s face into his hands, frowning. “But you’re right here.” His thumbs brush against the man’s cheekbone as he takes a deep breath then steps away. “Get dressed. Let’s go.” He most absolutely does not watch Derek get dressed. Stiles wouldn’t do that ever.

 

 

The vet’s office is closed for the day once they get there. The door is unlocked though because Deaton was probably expecting him. Stiles swears there is no limit to what that man knows, and if he’s an emissary like Deaton then Stiles hopes he will be that way some day. He could really freak people out with how much he knows. That would be some serious fun. He starts to wonder if Deaton actually does get a kick out of being so cryptic.

They sit down in the examination room, Stiles on the table. They start going through all of the elements, Stiles showing him how much better he is getting at air. They play with earth after that. By playing with earth, Stiles means playing with a pot of dirt. Literally. A pot. Of dirt. But he did make the dirt move around a little so that was…weird. Super weird actually.

Then they work on water, and Stiles makes the water drip out of the sink whenever Deaton isn’t looking then turns it off when he checks it. Stiles just shrugs and goes, “Guess water is a no-go.”

Derek is glaring at him, but he has a hint of a smile on his face as he watches Deaton look exasperated at Stiles. Stiles just grins back at his mate.

“Stiles, you have to really try and focus,” Deaton tells him when the water still isn’t coming out.

With a roll of his eyes and a sigh, Stiles makes water pour out of the faucet with a smirk. “We good on this?” he asks. “Can we move on?”

Deaton nods, moving onto fire, which is exactly when Derek decides that he just really needs to leave the room, looking embarrassed.

“Der,” Stiles calls out before the man leaves. He motions for his boymate to come closer, and he does. Stiles wraps his arms around his neck and kisses his cheek. “Don’t worry about it, okay? I get it.”

Derek nods, smiling slightly as he walks out of the room. Stiles frowns slightly, but then starts to focus on warmth. The warmth of being wrapped around Derek at night mainly. The warmth of them in bed together, their bodies flush against each other. Stiles opens his eyes to see flames licking across his hands.

“You seem to be the best at air and fire,” Deaton says, watching the fire move in Stiles’ hands.

It’s really fucking weird to have _fire_ in your hands and it not be burning you. Actually, it’s kind of trippy. “Why does Derek have to be here when I do this stuff?” Stiles asks, playing around with the fire. He tries to form it into a ball, then tosses it lightly from hand to hand. Then suddenly, it’s gone. He can’t even bring it back. Apparently, his magic works a lot better with Derek around. That’s awesome. Another reason to always be around Derek.

“He is your anchor,” the man answers simply.

Stiles rolls his eyes. “I figured that out from the books. But what the books _don’t_ say is how that works. What exactly does it mean for him to be my anchor?”

“When you practice with the elements like this, it takes a lot out of you,” Deaton answers, and Stiles looks up because he might actually get a straight answer from the man. “You hardly remember your first time, but you’re getting stronger and better with the elements. More in tune with them, so it’s not taking as much out of you. That and your bond with Derek is even stronger. Derek helps ground you. While practicing magic, your soul gets caught up in the elements, but with your anchor, he brings you back, reminds you that you still have a place amongst the rest of us.”

Stiles is frowning. “I could go crazy from this? Like batshit insane actually lose my mind?”

Deaton just nods once.

“And you didn’t bother to warn me at all about that before you made me start practicing this?” Stiles isn’t actually sure how he feels about this. He would’ve liked to know, but he doesn’t know if that would have stopped him or not.

“This is a part of your nature, Stiles,” Deaton answers. “You would have started practicing this stuff with or without my help. With my help, you have access to the right information and the experience of someone who has been through exactly what you have been through.”

“What’s your anchor?” Stiles asks softly.

Deaton looks away, up at the windows and sighs. “She died in the Hale fire. I haven’t practiced since.”

Stiles looks down sadly, not wanting to even imagine what it would be like to lose Derek now that they’re so close. Maybe that’s why Stiles instinctively kept saving the werewolf despite their rocky relationship. Maybe deep down he knew.

“Will I always have to rely on Derek for everything?” Stiles asks softly.

Deaton shakes his head. “Once you become stronger at this, you will be able to be strong enough to have distance between your anchor. It doesn’t help that he’s also your mate, but it’s possible.”

After that, Stiles decides it’s time to go. It’s already almost seven and they need to get back to his house to have dinner with his dad. Derek is waiting in the waiting room for him. Stiles offers him a smile and his hand, but he doesn’t say anything as they walk to the car.

Once they get back to the house, Stiles goes up to his room with Derek following. He packs another bag and then looks up at the werewolf. “Are you okay with me practically living with you?” Stiles asks.

Derek nods. “Of course. As long as your dad allows it. He is the Sheriff.”

Stiles rolls his eyes. “He’s not as scary as he pretends to be.”

They go back downstairs, sitting on the couch until his dad arrives ten minutes later with Chinese food. His dad herds them to the table and they all sit around it as the food circles around the three of them.

“Alright, what is it you have to tell me?” his dad asks.

Stiles swallows and tells his dad all about werewolf mates with the facts from the books he has read and nothing else. All he can tell his dad about is the facts right now.

“So your Derek’s mate?” the sheriff asks.

Both of the boys nod. Stiles thinks that’s enough for the evening, deciding that telling his dad about the magic and anchor thing will have to wait until another family dinner night.

“So are you living at Derek’s now?” his dad asks him, his face completely blank so Stiles can’t gauge his reaction.

Stiles swallows with nervousness again. Under the table, Derek grabs his hand, and it completely relaxes him. “If that’s okay with you.”

His dad is silent for a moment before leaning back in his chair, stretching with a sigh. “You’re stubborn like your mom,” he says so quietly Stiles doesn’t think he heard right. His dad never talks about his mom unless he’s drunk. “I can’t stop you, but so help me God if your grades start slipping, you are moving back home. You will come to dinner four times a week and Derek at least twice. I reserve the right to change my conditions at any given time. You are still a minor, Stiles, and I am still your father. And if anything like last night happens again, _you will call me_. If you need it, I will call you into school sick.”

Stiles just stares blankly at his dad for a moment, confused of how easily the man took it. Obviously, he and Derek agree to the man’s demands easily because it’s not like they’re that ridiculous. So after they finish up dinner, Stiles goes up to his room and starts packing even more of his stuff. Mainly just books. Like the books that Deaton gave him and then all of his own notebooks that are full of the notes he has been taking about werewolves. He couldn’t keep it on his computer in case his dad was checking that.

Then there’s a knock on the door, and Stiles spins around to face his dad, who is looking around the room sadly. “You’re already grown up,” the man whispers. “I didn’t actually see it until today, but you’re a man now, Stiles. At seventeen, you’re a man.”

Stiles grimaces and walks to his dad, grabbing him into a tight hug. “I will always be your son, though, and you will always be my dad.”

The sheriff grips his son tightly, both of their eyes slipping close. “I love you so much. I’m so proud of the man you’ve become. I know it must have been hard. Is hard, but you turned out so well. You’re a better man than I could have ever hoped for.”

Tears start slipping down Stiles’ cheeks at that as he buries his face into his dad’s shoulder. “I love you, Dad, but it’s not like I’m dying. I’ll still be ten minutes away, and I’ll be here pestering you about your health so much that you won’t even miss me.”

His dad laughs at that, but the sound is off like his dad is crying too. They finally pull back, looking away from each other as they wipe at their eyes, neither of them acknowledging the fact that the other was crying.

The sheriff claps Stiles on the shoulder once before retiring into his room for the night. Stiles watches him with a frown, but this isn’t the end of his relationship with his dad. Derek only lives ten minutes away from his house. He still has his jeep. He can come visit his dad whenever he wants.

Derek walks into the room, watching Stiles with careful concern. “Do you need help?” he offeres.

So obviously Stiles makes the werewolf carry the suitcase with all of his books in it. “And be careful. Those books are older than you, grandpa.”

“How old do you think I am, Stiles?” Derek asks with a laugh as he carries the suitcase easily down the stairs.

Stiles spares his empty room one last look before shutting off the light and following Derek down the stairs. “I don’t know. Peter once mentioned that you guys don’t age like normal humans, so I’m just assuming you’re immortal at this point. Seriously, though. How many times have you died?”

Derek sends back a glare for that one as he loads the books into the back of the jeep.

“Also, you have to be done with that whole dying thing now,” Stiles tells him, putting his other bags on top of the suitcase. “I’m pretty sure I will have a huge meltdown if that happens.” He doesn’t mention to Derek what it would do to him emotionally or even physically; he’s not ready for Derek to know that yet.

They get back into the car, driving towards Derek’s when Derek asks, “You sure you want this?”

Stiles glances at him, giving him a look like he’s the biggest idiot in the world. “I’ve never wanted anything more than I want you. And it’s not like we’re moving out of state. I’m ten minutes at most away from my dad’s house.” And whoa. Stiles is just going to ignore how easily he emotionally moved out of his dad’s house. The place not even being _home_ anymore. “Are we still nesting?” he asks instead with a smile.

“I’d like to,” Derek answers honestly. “It might be nice to have _our_ own place away from all the bad memories, but it will have to be after the full moon.”

Stiles nods and then thinks about it. “We’ve only been together for a week.”

“I know,” Derek says curtly then gives Stiles a look. “Does that upset you?”

Stiles enthusiastically shakes his head. “Not even a little bit. I feel like I’ve been with you for years. Like, I’m ready to settle down with you. The fuck is that?” There is a long moment of silence that Stiles just has to fill. “What? Why are you frowning like that? Is this too fast for you?” And just like that he’s worried that maybe Derek doesn’t want this like he does. Maybe Derek is just saying yes to all this because he feels bad for Stiles and knows that needs someone. Maybe he’s just being a fucking martyr like always.

“Of course not,” Derek says quickly, leaning over to catch Stiles’ hand and squeezes it tightly. “I’ve never seen a human react so much like a werewolf to a mate bond. Humans act like this after maybe _years_ of being mated.”

“Is it because we sucked each other’s dicks?” Stiles asks as he parks the car and the climbs out to walk up to Derek’s – _their_ apartment.

Derek just laughs at that as he opens up the door. They leave Stiles stuff in the jeep for now, agreeing that they’ll get it later. After training today, Stiles is exhausted and he really just wants to go to bed. So he starts walking to the bed as he strips, waiting for Derek to continue their conversation.

“No,” the werewolf finally answers once Stiles is under the covers. He slides in a few moments later after he shucks his clothes. “We haven’t even properly mated. It’s probably because you’re not fully human. Or at least you have supernatural qualities. And you were pretty assimilated in werewolf culture before we acknowledged our bond.”

“Whoa,” Stiles says, curling up closer to his mate, tucking his head under Derek’s chin. “You need to shut up. I think you’ve reached your word limit for the day…but we should ask Deaton about it at my next training session. I think you’re right, though.”

Derek wraps his arms around Stiles tightly before saying, “There’re probably lots of reasons for your weirdness, though.”

“Hey!” Stiles says, pretending to actually be offended when he isn’t. “Rude.”

Derek huffs out a laugh and leans down to kiss Stiles softly before they drift off into another night of dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is in an alternating POV woohoo.


	13. Your Cold Shoulder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Italics are flashbacks. The first set is in Derek's POV, the second set of ilatics is in Stiles'. The rest of the chapter is in Derek's POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to note that this is probably the hardest chapter to write. I'm not about the action writing, but I tried. I hope it's okay... I spent an hour editing it.

Derek knew Stiles was going to be taken. He _knew_. They had planned for it and everything, but that doesn’t stop him from worrying about his mate on the night before the full moon when he comes back to his apartment from getting dinner to find it empty. Sure, Peter is a day earlier than they expected, but they have this all planned out. Stiles will be okay.

“Stiles will be okay,” a voice reassures him aloud. Laura is sitting next to him, her hand running through his hair, the other rubbing at his back. “Stiles is okay. He’s strong. Peter won’t hurt him until tomorrow night. Until the sacrifice.”

Derek squeezes his eyes shut just to picture his mate. The last time he saw Stiles, the teenager was yelling at him. Derek really doesn’t want that to be his last memory of his mate.

“We’ll save him,” Laura soothes. “He’ll be fine, Der. We got this.”

_“Seriously?” Stiles yells. “Derek, how can you not even be angry at the man?”_

_“He’s my uncle, Stiles. He’s still family. We can’t just kill him!” Derek doesn’t understand why Stiles doesn’t get this. He gets everything else._

_Stiles sighs, closing his eyes as he hands curl into fists. “So we’re just going to stop this sacrifice and hopes he doesn’t try anything else ever again? How many times does he have to kill your sisters? Should I bring Cora back just so he can kill her again? Then he can kill Laura. Two for two on his two nieces.”_

_“Stiles,” Derek yells, his eyes flashing blue. “Stop.”_

_Stiles just shakes his head, stepping closer and shoving at Derek’s chest. “I won’t stop until you get mad at him. You need to be mad at him. He wants to kill Laura. He has killed Laura and Cora. He wants to kill me. He wants to kill you. Why does that not upset you?”_

_“Of course it upsets me!” Derek yells, grabbing onto Stiles’ waist and pulls him closer. “You and Laura are all I have left and all I care about. Of course I’m mad that he wants to kill what little I have left in this world. Without you, I have no reason to be here, but that doesn’t justify killing my family.”_

_“I’m not saying we should kill your family,” Stiles says softly, pressing closer to Derek. “I’m just saying that we need to stop him for good.”_

_Derek just shakes his head and steps away from his mate. “I’m gonna go get dinner.”_

_Stiles just glares at him. “Yeah, just walk away from your problems, Derek. That’s definitely how we’re going to fix things. A-plus in communication, Der. A-plus.”_

_Derek doesn’t respond, just leaves the apartment to go get Stiles’ favorite for their last night together before the full moon._

“Laura, was he right?” Derek croaks out, staring down at the floor.

“Why do you look like you’ve already given up?” Laura asks instead, slapping her brother on the back of his hand.

“Ow!” Derek exclaims, rubbing the back of his head while he glares at his sister. “I’ve given up because even when we get Stiles back, he isn’t going to want me anymore. I’m a failure at relationships. I can’t talk out our problems like a healthy adult.”

Laura just groans. “Stiles is your mate, Der. And you’re his as much he is yours. He feels the same exact things as you. He even told you that. I think you’re going to have to do something much worse than refuse to talk for him to give up on your ass.”

“Thanks, Laura. You’re so helpful.”

“Anytime, bro,” she says lightly with a smile. “Will it make you feel better to go over the plan?”

Derek nods his head, so they do.

_“I’m going to veto whatever plans you guys have already made,” Stiles says as he walks through the door to find Laura and Derek sitting on the couch after he gets home from school. “Because it’s going to be horrible. You are going to want to just attack, but it has to be more than that. Peter knows the two of you. He knows that you two are just going to fight back. He is going to plan ahead for that.”_

_“So what do you think we should do?” Laura asks, making Stiles stop in his tracks. He has to remind himself that this is how it is now. Laura actually listens to him, but he still has to appear shocked at least for Derek’s sake. But Derek has probably guessed at this point._

_“Plan against Peter,” Stiles answers simply, sitting next to Derek on the couch. “He’s going to lock you guys up. Let’s be honest here. Probably ropes soaked in wolfsbane because that’s how he works. I’m going to be trapped with mistletoe, you guys with mountain ash, but luckily for us, I don’t need my hands or much room to use my powers. I just need Derek within the vicinity.”_

_Derek smiles softly at that, grabbing at Stiles’ hand._

_“He’ll kidnap us all separately most likely,” Stiles tells them, leaning back. “I’m going to put up a fake fight, but he doesn’t know the extent of my powers.”_

_“I don’t even know the extent of your powers,” Laura points out. “What if you’re not as powerful as you think you are, Stiles?”_

_“I think he’s a lot more powerful than he thinks,” Derek says softly._

_Stiles blushes at that, but they have bigger things to talk about. “They’re performing a ritual. What’s going to happen is that Jennifer is going to try and sacrifice the three of us. Starting with Derek, ending with me. At least that’s what Lydia and I think.”_

_“Where is she by the way?” Laura asks._

_Stiles shrugs. “She said she wasn’t ready to talk about it. Anyway. I won’t let him even get close to Derek, so that’s not an issue. Like at all. I’m going to work on somehow getting you guys out of your restraints without Jennifer or Peter knowing. Then I’m going to break your mountain ash circles. I won’t be able to leave my mistletoe prison (there’s something I never thought I’d say) until Jennifer says so or until she dies. I’m guessing she’s going to die first, but I don’t want you guys to kill her yet.”_

_“Why not?” Derek asks._

_Stiles looks away. “I want to deal with her myself. You guys can deal with Peter.”_

_“And how are you going to do that within your mistletoe prison?” Laura asks._

_He just shrugs. “I’ll wing it, okay? Don’t worry about it. I have my own plan.”_

_“What’s your plan?” Derek asks._

_Stiles just shakes his head. “Nothing, okay? I just. I really have some anger issues I need to take out on her, okay? Not only did she kidnap my dad while planning to kill, she also slept with my mate, and I’m a jealous guy.” He stops again and sighs because this is getting off topic. “We’re going to need Scott’s help.”_

_“Not until last minute,” Laura says. “Otherwise, Peter will figure it out.”_

_Stiles nods, accepting her demand. He looks at the two of them, taking a deep breath. They’ve got this. They’re going to be okay._

Derek can’t sleep. His bed smells just like Stiles. Their scents mixing together. He curls around Stiles’ pillow, where his scent is the most potent. He nuzzles into it, trying to pretend that it’s Stiles. That his mate is in his arms and safe, but Derek has no idea what is happening to Stiles right now, if he’s sleeping, if he’s being tortured, or if he misses Derek as much as Derek misses him.

Then suddenly, the world is black again.

When Derek comes to, the first thing he notices is his wrists are burning. The next thing is the smell of Stiles. He opens his eyes to locate his mate, who is sitting a couple yards in front of him, looking away from Derek. Tears are falling from his brown eyes, making Derek’s heart break. He wants to reach out to the teenager, but he’s trapped where he is. He glares at the mountain ash that is keeping him from his mate.

Stiles looks up with a gasp then gives him a shaky smile. “Hey, sleeping beauty,” he says, his voice shaky.

“Are you okay?” Derek asks him, his eyes scanning for wounds while he tried to smell for blood.

Stiles nods. “I’m fine, Der,” he says softly, trying to comfort Derek. “How are your wrists?”

Derek shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it. Are you tied up?”

Stiles nods again, glancing behind his back at his wrists that are tied up. He frowns slightly at them, and Derek wishes he could rip the bonds apart to comfort his mate, but he can’t. “Don’t worry about it,” Stiles echoes Derek’s word with a small smile on his face.

Derek can tell Stiles is just putting on a strong face for him, and while he appreciates it, he wants to know exactly how the teenager is feeling. “Stiles, what time is it?” he asks instead.

Stiles shrugs. “I think it might be morning by now. They’re planning on taking Laura around noon or maybe closer to night because with the three of us together, apparently we would conspire. Weird, right?”

Derek nods. “I guess the two of us wouldn’t conspire?”

Stiles shakes his head. “No, we’re just supposed to talk about how much we love each other. I wrote a few sonnets in my head over the night in preparation.”

Derek rolls his eyes. “Is this what Peter told you?”

Stiles’ face pales at the sentence, and his heart starts pounding as his breathing just stops altogether. Derek can see him swallow nervously as he looks away. He doesn’t say anything, but Derek suspects enough as he sighs.

“What did Peter tell you?” Derek asks him in a demanding tone. He needs to know what his uncle said so he can fix it.

Stiles is shaking his head again but still won’t look at his mate. “Nothing of consequence. You’re okay, right?”

“I’m fine, Stiles,” Derek tells him, exasperated. He doesn’t want Stiles to be putting him first. Derek wants Stiles to put himself first for once.

 

 

The fear finally hits Derek when Jennifer starts chanting in another language. Peter’s face, lit by the moon, is facing the sky, his eyes closed. Laura is practically growling, her eyes red like they have been since she arrived a few hours ago. They’re outside, circled around the nemeton with a fire in front of Derek where Jennifer and Peter are standing, which is slightly freaking Derek out.

Stiles keeps looking over at his mate, worry coloring his face as he looks from Derek to the fire like he’s trying to figure out to put as much distance between the two even though both boys are trapped exactly where they are.

Jennifer starts chanting and looks over at Derek with a smile. “It’s been a while,” she says with a grin. “Too bad you’re dressed this time.” Her eyes glance over at Stiles the same time that Derek’s do. She just laughs at Stiles’ glare towards her. “That’s cute. The two of together? Peter tells me your _mates_. How _adorable_.”

Derek growls at that; she is making their bond seem worthless when it is the most significant thing in Derek’s life.  Nothing will never be more important to him than Stiles, and Jennifer belittling that makes Derek’s wolf rip her throat out. His wolf is closer to the surface with the full moon almost at its peak.

“You were rather good in bed,” she says with a flick of her eyebrows. She looks back at Stiles. “But you wouldn’t know that, would you? You’re still a virgin.”

Stiles’ eyes darken as his glare hardens at her. “Fuck you.”

“That’s no way to talk to your teacher,” she chastises, but her eyes are lighted up with amusement. Derek hates that she finds this whole thing _funny_. Sacrificing them is hilarious to her, a source of amusement.

“Teachers don’t usually murder their students,” Stiles retorts.

She laughs. “They think about it,” she tells him. “But I’m not murdering you, Stiles. Why don’t you understand this? You’re a sacrifice. It’s an honor.”

Stiles snorts that. “Good thing I’ve never been such an honorable person.”

“As much as I appreciate this banter,” Laura finally says, her voice deep with anger, “can we just get to the point of sacrificing us all so Peter can be an alpha?”

Peter’s eyes fly open and glance at his niece shrewdly. “So Stiles did finally share his discoveries,” he says in his eerily calm voice. “I wondered if would break my trust.”

“Your trust?” Stiles scoffs. “Like you trust anyone, Peter.”

Peter’s eyes flash at that. “When has anyone given me reason, boy?”

Stiles is pale again as he shrinks away from Peter, and Derek can’t help but think that Peter did something to Stiles. He has no idea what, but he will figure it out.

Jennifer rolls her eyes at all of them and steps closer to Derek, carefully stepping over the mountain ash line while not breaking it. She has something in her hands, but Derek doesn’t know what it is. A cord of something. He can hear Stiles’ heartbeat racing as he mutters expletives under his breath.

Then very clearly, he can hear the sadness thick in Stiles’ voice as he whispers, “I’m so sorry, Derek.”

Derek has no idea what he is apologizing for until his wrists start burning. He doesn’t react at all and when he looks over at Laura, her eyes are slightly narrowed. He sees that the ropes around her wrists are on fire, and he suspects that his are too, but the fire is small enough to not be noticed by Peter and Jennifer. Derek also notices the lack of the burning smell from fire. Can Stiles really block that out?

He stops focusing on that and instead is focusing on the flames that are licking his skin with a blue smoke floating into the sky from the wolfsbane, but they stopped burning. He still starts to panic. Flashes of his house in flames dance along his vision, the screams of his family, his pack fill his ears. He closes his eyes to block it out, but it just makes it worse. He practically chokes on the smell of burning flesh and blood, his family still screaming in the background.

But then his wrists are free. He stands up and launches himself at Jennifer with a loud growl. Laura is standing up and staring at the two of them. Derek’s fangs are less than an inch from the woman’s skin, and he can smell the panic coming off of the two women.

“Derek,” Stiles calls out. “Not yet.”

He takes a deep breath and throws Jennifer back, making sure her feet scrape across the mountain ash to break the circle. He looks over at Stiles whose eyes are closed. Derek can feel a breeze of air around him, stopping once Laura’s mountain ash circle is broken. She launches herself at Peter, who is frozen panic.

“No!” Derek’s uncle shouts. “Damnit, Stiles. You weren’t supposed to be this powerful.”

Stiles just glares at him, turning his gaze to Jennifer, who is shaking in fear. Derek doesn’t know what to do, but when he steps closer to Stiles, a rush of air is pushing him back so hard that he falls onto his back.

When he sits back up, it’s chaos. Scott is running in from the woods, his claws slicing through Peter’s back right as Peter was about to slice Laura’s throat. Isaac follows him, tackling Peter. Lydia runs in, staring down at Peter with a hard look on her face. Arrows are flying from the tops of the trees, and Jennifer is now in Stiles’ mistletoe circle. Her eyes are wide as she stares at Stiles, scared but determined.

“You think you’re going to kill _me_?” she asks Stiles incredulously.

“Not kill,” Stiles tells her darkly, his hands free from the bonds. “You’re going to be a sacrifice. It’s an honor.”

“Stiles!” Derek shouts, rushing to the circle. “You can’t kill her.”

Stiles face softens at his mate. “I have to,” he says, his voice breaking. “I don’t want to, Derek, but it’s the only way to keep you safe and happy.”

Derek shakes his head. “All I need is you. That’s it.”

Jennifer’s eyes narrow as she thinks everything through. “You two are a lot closer than Peter has shared,” she observes and then smiles. “Tell me, Derek. What would you do if I killed Stiles?”

Before he can respond, she has the cord around Stiles’ neck, the boy’s eyes wide with surprise. Derek tries not to hear his mate’s chocking sounds as he tries to breathe. Derek can feel himself shifting. He can feel his claws ripping from his hands, his fangs elongating in his mouth, the bones of his face shifting. He can hear Stiles’ voice in his head _“Where the hell do your eyebrows go?!”_ but that isn’t the point. His eyes lock on Jennifer, and a growl escapes from his chest. He moves closer, but he’s stopped at the edge of the circle.

“It’s laced with mountain ash,” she tells him with a wicked grin, her eyes glinting. “Just in case. Always have a Plan B.”

Stiles gasp as the cord tightens around his neck. He’s trying to choke out something.

Derek turns back to his pack for help when he sees Lydia running towards them, tears pouring down her face. “Stiles!” she yells as she runs to the circle then she stops. Her eyes are impossibly wide as she screams. All of the wolves cover their ears at the screeching sound of her scream that signals the death that is about to come. She finishes and her face comes to a realization as she stares at Stiles. She knows someone is going to die, and right now, Stiles is in a precarious position. The tears are coming faster from her eyes, but now she just looks _pissed_.

“ _No_ ,” she yells determinedly and moves past the circle, stabbing something in Jennifer’s side. Derek didn’t even realize the redhead had a knife.

Jennifer’s grip on Stiles slackens as she falls to her knees, hissing in pain, and Stiles jumps away from her, gasping for air. His heart starts pounding faster than ever, foreshadowing what is about to happen. Derek has seen this from Stiles before, knows exactly what it’s going to bring.

“Stiles,” Derek says softly, trying to reach Stiles, but he can’t. “Calm down. Breathe. We need you right now. You can’t panic right now. Not yet.”

Stiles looks up at him, and it takes him a moment to understand the words before he nods, his face hardening in determination. He looks around at all the werewolves standing around. Derek looks around too, seeing Peter’s dead body lying in pieces. He can’t say that he is exactly devastated, but he is sad to see the last of his family dead. He also suspects that Lydia delivered the final blow, finally getting her revenge.

Stiles looks back at Lydia, having a silent conversation with the girl and when she nods, Stiles is in motion. He takes ahold of the cord that was around his neck, wrapping it around the darach’s instead. He looks up, finding Derek’s eyes. “Don’t hate me for this,” Stiles begs. “And look away.”

“I’ll never hate you,” Derek tells him before listening to his mate’s instructions and turning around.

He can hear Stiles chanting in another language. The moon is at its peak. Isaac starts growling and howling into the sky while Derek wants to do the same, but he is listening to what is happening with Stiles. If he can’t watch, he’ll listen.

He doesn’t even bother to try to figure out Stiles is doing, why exactly he is sacrificing Jennifer. Derek can’t even bother to care, too filled with worry for his mate. Then something weird is happening. He can feel power surging inside of him. He has felt this before, but it’s much stronger now. He has only felt it when Stiles was practicing his magic. Now, Derek is trying to figure out _what the hell is Stiles doing_.

Jennifer’s choked noises have nowhere near the same effect on Derek as Stiles’ did. He can hear Stiles’ heavy breathing and smell the guilt emanating from him. Then he hears the distinct sound of skin breaking once Stiles stops chanting. Then the heavy thump of a body thumping to the ground.

That’s when Derek looks back to see that Stiles was the one that fell, Lydia’s arms around him, cradling his head in her lap. Jennifer is lying lifeless next to them. “Lydia,” Derek growls. “Break the circle. _Now_.”

She jumps up after carefully putting Stiles’ head on the ground. Her foot kicks around the ashes, and she walks over to Laura, wrapping her arms around the alpha. Derek doesn’t care. He rushes to Stiles’ side, crashing onto the ground. He can hear the soft heartbeat of his mate, but he needs to feel it, needs to ascertain that Stiles is still alive.

He holds the boy in his arms, burying his face into his mate’s neck, breathing in the scent. After a few minutes, Derek stands up, Stiles limply hanging in his arms. Without a look back or to anyone standing around, he walks away from the nemeton to go care for his mate.


	14. You'll Never Let It Go

Stiles blinks awake, trying to figure out where he is. It’s bright wherever he is, and he is not ready to wake up. He just snuggles his face deeper into whatever his head on. A pillow? Oh, wait. Nope. That’s not a pillow. That is definitely a person and that is the person’s chest.

He opens his eyes again, peaking up at whoever he is laying on and everything in him relaxes at the sight of Derek. “Hi,” he croaks out and stretches. He presses his lips to Derek’s skin, feeling the man shudder under him.

“Hey, sleeping beauty,” Derek says softly.

Then it all rushes back to Stiles, and he groans, burying his face back into Derek’s chest. “Did it work?” he asks desperately.

“Did what work?” Derek asks, confused.

“Bringing Cora back,” Stiles tells him, also confused. It didn’t work. If Derek has no idea what he’s talking about, it didn’t work. “Fuck. I’m sorry, Derek. I tried. I really did.”

“You did _what_?” Derek looks mad. Fuck. Why does Derek look so mad?

“I’m sorry it didn’t work,” Stiles says sadly, rolling over away from Derek and sitting up. He pulls his legs up to his chest, still feeling pretty weak.

“You tried to bring Cora back?” Derek asks him, sitting up to face Stiles. “Why?”

Stiles looks down at the bed. “Because she didn’t deserve to die. It wasn’t her time.” He buries his face into his knees, unable to face Derek because he failed. He tried to do one thing for Derek, and it didn’t work. He couldn’t even do that much. Maybe Peter was right. Maybe Stiles is just as useless as before. Even _with_ magic, Stiles is still a failure.

“What do you mean Peter was right?” Derek asks because apparently Stiles mumbled some of his thought out loud. “What did Peter say to you?”

Stiles shakes his head. “Nothing,” he automatically answers. “He was just trying to rile me up to see how powerful I am.”

“What did he say?” Derek demands.

Stiles never knew the comforter was so entertaining to look at because he can’t face Derek right now. He’s too weak. Peter was right. “Maybe you need a new mate,” Stiles whispers brokenly, not wanting to picture Derek with anyone else.

“A new mate?” There’s a pause. “What the fuck, Stiles? Why would I want a new mate?”

“Because I’m not powerful enough,” Stiles tells him finally looking up. “You should have a stronger mate. I don’t deserve you.”

Derek just looks so lost and confused, and Stiles wants to fix it, but he can’t. The things Peter tells him keeps running through his head. _Do you think a werewolf could actually want you, Stiles?_ And Peter is right. Peter is always right.

“Stiles,” Derek says softly, wrapping an arm around Stiles’ shoulders. “If anything, you’re too good for me.”

Stiles is already shaking his head before Derek finishes his sentence. “I’m not good enough. I couldn’t even bring Cora back. I’m useless.”

“Useless? Do we need to go over what you did last night?” Derek asks him, eyes wide, and he looks a little pissed. Probably because Stiles couldn’t bring Cora back. “You burned the ropes off of not only me but also Laura without burning either of us and without Peter being able to smell the fire. That must have taken a lot of magic, Stiles.” And it had. Stiles is still exhausted after last night, but it still wasn’t enough. “You were amazing last night, Stiles. No one will ever be that incredible to me. No one could ever match up to you.”

Stiles looks up at him, trying to find Derek’s tell. Not that Stiles had figured out his tell yet (he will one day), but somehow he can tell that the werewolf isn’t lying to him. Instead of responding, he just looks away and frowns. He doesn’t want to admit what he did last night because it doesn’t make up for what he _didn’t_ do. Which was bring back Cora.

Fuck. Cora is still gone. All of this was for nothing because she is still gone, and there’s still going to be that void in Derek’s heart for the rest of his life.

 _Do you think a werewolf could actually want you, Stiles? Someone as weak and insignificant as you? Maybe if you had taken the Bite when I had offered, it would all be a different story. But no. You were too weak to even admit to yourself that you want this power. Everyone wants power, Stiles. No werewolf wants a weak mate, and_ you _, Stiles, are a weak mate._

Peter was right.

“Stiles, please tell me what he said,” Derek practically pleads.

Stiles shrugs. “He told me that I’m not good enough for you. That if you could live, you would be happier without me. At first, he tried torturing me, but that didn’t work. Threaten me? You get no reaction. But threaten my mate and my pack? That gives you a reaction, but I didn’t give him one. I couldn’t because he couldn’t see how powerful I was.” Stiles snorts at that bitterly. “Except I’m not at all powerful.”

“Torture you?” Derek echoes then his eyes are frantically scanning Stiles’ bare chest. “I don’t see any marks. What kind of torture?”

Stiles frowns at that and looks down at himself. He can clearly see the cuts and the bruises that have formed from the hits he took from Peter. He was so scared last night that he would break his ribs, but Stiles thinks he’s good on that front. “You don’t see this?” Stiles asks, looking back up.

Derek starts frowning and then his fingers brush across a bruise. “You hid it from me,” he whispers with the realization.

“I didn’t even mean to,” Stiles says softly, looking away. “I didn’t want you to see them because I knew you would get upset, but I didn’t intentionally hide them from you. I didn’t even know I could do that.”

“You hid scents from Peter last night,” Derek points out. “What makes you think you can’t hide this kind of stuff? You’re more powerful than you think.”

Stiles is still slightly suspicious about it, though. He opens his mouth to say something, but then something starts vibrating, so Stiles looks around for his phone, figuring he needs to call his dad anyway. He is supposed to tell his dad these things now, especially since he can’t make it to their dinner tonight like he had promised. But it’s not his phone that’s ringing; it’s Derek’s.

“What, Laura?” Derek sighs into the phone, glancing over at Stiles. Then he starts frowning as Laura talks, looking back over at Stiles with his eyes widen. “No. She…no.”

“What?” Stiles asks, sensing the tension in Derek and wanting to know what’s causing it.

“I…I can’t leave the apartment right now,” Derek whispers still staring at Stiles.

“Like hell you can’t,” Stiles mumbles, grabbing the phone from his boymate’s hand. He puts it to his ear. “Laura, I don’t know what you two are talking about, but if Derek needs to, he can leave. I’ll be fine without him.”

“Can you even walk, Stiles?” Derek asks him, but Stiles ignores him.

“It’s fine, Stiles,” Laura answers, and she actually sounds happy. It’s weird. He’s not used to anyone in the Hale family sounding happy unless it’s Peter talking about killing and torturing somebody. “I can bring her to you.”

“Who?” Stiles asks before his brain catches up with him.

“Cora,” Laura whispers, and Stiles can’t breathe.

“It worked?” he practically shouts, looking over at Derek with a huge grin on his face. “She’s alive?”

“You did this?” Laura asks. “You brought her back?”

Stiles frowns slightly and wonders if anyone else noticed what he was doing last night. How no one put two and two together. “Bring her. Please. I really want to see her.”

“Be there soon,” the alpha says and ends the conversation.

Stiles just grins at Derek widely. “She’s alive.”

Derek just nods once, but his eyes are lit up and little crinkles are by his eyes, which is practically the biggest smile Derek can give. “Cora’s alive.”

Stiles wants to cry. That’s how happy he is, but he calls his dad instead. He updates the Sheriff on everything and then adds in that he won’t make it to dinner tonight, but he invites his dad over to the apartment just so they can still see each other. The man agrees.

Once he hangs up, there’s a knock on the door, and Stiles looks at Derek expectantly. “You were right. I can’t exactly walk right now.” He hates to admit it, but he can’t, so Derek gets off the bed, pulling on a pair of sweats on his way to the door. He yanks it open and a dark haired girl is flying into his chest.

Stiles can’t stop the smile from forming on his face as he watches Cora and Derek hold each other tightly. He’d give anything to go over to join them right now. However, Laura does join them, wrapping her arms around both of them and burying her face into Cora’s hair. Stiles wonders how many family hugs they have had like this, and then Stiles realizes, this is the first time Laura has seen Cora in _years_. Laura thought her youngest sister was dead, and when she finally found out she wasn’t, she found her body days later.

This right here is a big moment.

“Oh, my god,” Cora finally groans. “Why does it smell so much like Stiles in here? Has he been helping you guys research twenty-four-seven? God, it smells like he moved in.” Then she looks around the apartment to spot Stiles in Derek’s bed. She frowns for a moment, confused and then grins. She pulls herself from her siblings and runs over to the bed.

“Careful, Cora!” Derek calls out as she jumps onto the bed, tackling Stiles into a hug.

He laughs and wraps his arms around her. “I missed you, Cora,” he tells her hair, holding on tight.

“I hear you’re the one who brought me back,” she says softly, pulling back so she can look at him. Stiles has never really seen Cora have a lot of emotion showing on her face, but she looks happy. She may not be full-out grinning, but she looks _happy_. “Thank you.”

Stiles can’t say anything back. He just smiles and looks over at his mate and his alpha. “Come on over!” he calls out. “Someone call Lydia. I think we need some pack-bonding right about now.”

“Lydia?” Cora asks, confused again while Laura calls up the strawberry blonde girl. “You guys need to tell me _everything_ I missed.”

Derek climbs back into bed, sitting back against the wall and pulling Stiles up so his back is on Derek’s chest in between the man’s legs. Cora snuggles up next to them, a hand in Derek’s hair and holding one of Stiles’ hands. Laura comes in next, lying across Stiles’ and Cora’s laps her head in her sister’s lap.

While they wait for Lydia to arrive, they try to update Cora as much as they can with Lydia changing packs, Stiles and Derek learning that they’re mates, Stiles learning that he has magic. By the time Lydia arrives with a huge smile on her face, they’re still on the magic. They haven’t made it to the events of Peter and Jennifer quite yet.

Lydia jumps onto the bed on Derek’s other side, picking up Laura’s legs to rest in her lap. Stiles watches idly as Lydia’s fingers run over Laura’s skin softly and wonders once more if there is something more going on there.

Laura, Lydia, and Stiles take turns of talking about what happened with Peter. They talk for so long that Stiles doesn’t even realize that it’s basically time for dinner until his dad is knocking on the door and opening it. His dad looks confused at their positions on the bed.

“It’s a pack thing,” Stiles says before his dad asks the obvious question. “It’s the first time we’ve all been together as a whole pack, so we had to start pack-cuddling.”

His dad still looks confused, but he gives a greeting smile. “I’m not going to be forced into this, right?”

“Not unless you want to,” Laura offers, and then Stiles double-takes because that definitely sounded like an invitation to join the pack.

The sheriff looks conflicted, but he decides on perching at the foot of the bed, resting a hand on his son’s ankle. Laura offered an olive branch, and he took it, but he isn’t exactly joining the pack yet. Stiles is just happy that his dad is so accepting of his new lifestyle because Stiles has never felt happier or more comfortable in his entire life.

As if Derek can feel this happiness radiating off of Stiles, he presses a kiss to the teenager’s bare shoulder to show that he is feeling the happiness too. That everything might actually work out for them.

 

“Bro,” Stiles says, crashing onto the couch with Scott.

“I can’t believe you didn’t think to mention that you live with Derek now,” Scott scolds him as he looks around the apartment that looks exactly the same. Stiles hasn’t exactly bothered to put his mark on it when they’re planning on moving out as soon as possible. They’ve been looking at places, but so far Derek hasn’t liked any.

“I wasn’t exactly thinking about it when we were planning on _not becoming sacrifices_ ,” Stiles sasses his best friend but then smiles. “It’s pretty awesome, though. I’m not gonna lie. But I am disappointed because we haven’t even had celebratory we-didn’t-get-sacrificed sex.”

“At least you have someone to have we-didn’t-die sex with,” Scott tells him with a sour expression on his face.

Stiles sighs. He could tell his best friend that he could easily convince Isaac or Allison to have we-didn’t-die sex with him, but he doesn’t. Stiles thinks his best friend should probably figure that out by himself. “I’m still thoroughly disappointed, though,” Stiles says.

“Stiles, you didn’t see what you looked like after using all your magic. You didn’t look up for sex. You couldn’t even stay conscious.”

Stiles rolls his eyes at that. “Okay, but I’m fine now. What’s stopping us now?”

“Hopefully the fact that I’m here,” Scott says with a grimace. “Please don’t have sex while I’m here.”

Stiles sighs while trying not to roll his eyes. “Scotty, I wouldn’t do that to you. Plus, our bed is right there.” He points at the object in question. “There is absolutely no privacy when it comes to our what you could loosely call our bedroom.”

Scott just shakes his head. “It’s so weird, bro. You’re like an adult. You live on your own.”

“He doesn’t live alone,” Derek calls out from the kitchen as he comes out carrying a tray of food.

Stiles tries to suppress the moan at seeing the hot man with food. Because hot guys plus food? That’s easily the best orgasm ever. “I knew there’s a reason I keep you around!”

Derek rolls his eyes and sits down next to him, placing the tray on the coffee table. “Thanks, Stiles. I feel so loved.”

Stiles grins at him and then sees what his boyfriend brought. He brought little pizzas. “Did you make these?” Stiles asks, reaching over to grab one and shoving it in his mouth.

Derek watches with an eyebrow raised as he grabs one for himself. He takes a bite of it like he’s a normal person and whatever. Stiles doesn’t have to impress Derek anymore. They’re so past that stage in their relationship. That stage never even existed in their relationship.

“These are amazing, man,” Scott tells him over his mouthful of pizza.

Stiles just nods his agreement enthusiastically as he chews.

“Am I constantly going to have teenagers in my apartment shoving their mouths full of food?” Derek asks with a grimace.

Stiles leans over and kisses his cheek. “Don’t pretend you’re not excited for that. And I’m only letting that _my apartment_ comment go because this isn’t technically our apartment. It’s yours.”

“So you said something about we-didn’t-get-sacrificed sex?” Derek questions as he bites into his pizza.

Stiles nods. “Yeah, we didn’t have any.”

“Stiles,” Scott whines. “I’m right here. Literally right here.”

And Stiles completely ignores his best friend’s pleas. “Why didn’t we have any?”

“Maybe because you were bruised and battered and not quite up to having sex?” Derek tells him.

Stiles rolls his eyes. “I’m always up for sex.”

“You were bruised and battered?” Scott asks, checking Stiles over. “I thought it was just the magic.”

Stiles sends a glare over at Derek because _thanks for that, asshole_. He didn’t exactly want Scott to know anything. “I’m fine, Scotty,” Stiles reassures, wrapping an arm around his co-alpha’s shoulders. “I fell a bit, got scraped up. I’m good.”

“You’re lying,” Scott points out.

“He doesn’t like talking about it,” Derek tells the alpha with a shrug. “I’ve tried, but he barely told me anything.”

Scott gives Stiles a look, his puppy dog eyes in full effect. “But I’m your best friend, Stiles. Your brother. You tell me everything.”

Stiles just shakes his head. “Not this one, Scotty. Not this one.” Because telling Scott would mean that Stiles has to reimagine the horrors Peter tried to paint for him. The horrors of Scott being hurt.

_What’s one more death tonight? When I become alpha, I’ll just make my own new pack. Might as well kill off my competition one by one. Starting with Lydia. I’ll make Scott watch every single one of his pack die off then I’ll finally be merciful enough to kill him. Of course, it will be slow because hearing Scott whine is quite amusing._

When someone’s arm wraps around him, Stiles comes back to the present and leans against Derek, needing the comfort and support right now. He looks over at his best friend, his brother. Scott’s safe. He’s fine. Derek’s safe. Derek’s fine. They’re both right here with Stiles still breathing and still alive.

“Why don’t you like this one?” Stiles asks, exasperated.

Derek’s face is scrunched up in disgust and wrinkles his nose. “It smells weird, Stiles.”

Stiles sighs and looks around at the apartment. He loves it, though. “Can’t we just do a deep cleaning and then I’ll like rub myself all over so it smells like me instead?”

Derek gives him a look at that, and Stiles doesn’t know what else to say when his werewolf boyfriend tells him that the apartment they’re looking at smells weird. “The deep cleaning might work,” he mumbles, looking around.

“Okay, so close your nose for a few minutes,” Stiles instructs, grabbing onto his mate’s arm and dragging him further into the apartment. “What do you think with your eyes? The living room is big enough to fit a huge ass couch for pack nights. We actually have a closed off bedroom, so that should be nice. There’s an extra room. We could make it into a guest room or maybe an office for us to share.”

Derek listens to Stiles carefully as he walks around the apartment, going towards the kitchen. “The appliances are new,” he comments.

Stiles beams because that’s basically as much approval as he is going to get from his stupid sourwolf. This is the fifth apartment they’ve looked at, and Derek has turned down all of the other ones. Okay, Stiles did turn down a few of them flat out but still. The point is that Derek is fucking picky, and now they finally found something.

“Can we go now?” Derek asks him, eyes pleading. “I won’t step foot in here until it’s us cleaning.”

Stiles laughs and nods, pulling his boymate out of the apartment before glancing at his phone. “Shit, I got that interview in twenty minutes!” Stiles kisses Derek quickly. “I gotta go. I’ll meet you up at home. Text me when you’re done filling out the paperwork, okay?”

Derek sighs but leans in to kiss Stiles once more before the teenager runs out of the apartment complex. Stiles can’t be late. This is his first job interview, and it’s the job he actually wants. Working at a library? Always has been a fantasy of his. Surrounded by books and people who actually want to read the books sounds like a good time to Stiles.

He’s nervous during the entire interview. They ask questions that Stiles didn’t expect like “What are your best qualities?” He suspects that saying he can create really strong winds with just his mind isn’t the answer they’re looking for. Plus, he is too insecure to answer that question without bullshit. Saying he has no best qualities isn’t the ideal answer either.

So he appears confident when on the inside, he is jittery with nerves and hope. He really wants this job even if Derek keeps telling him that he doesn’t need a job. That he just needs to focus on school, but Stiles wants to be able to help out even if it’s just a hundred dollars a week from working part-time at the library. He wants to help. It’s going to be his apartment too.

In the middle of the interview, his phone vibrates which goes by unnoticed luckily. Stiles knows it’s just a text from Derek, so he finishes the interview with no problems.

“Well, Mr. Stilinski, you seem that you will fit right in here,” the interviewer, Jessica he thinks she said her name was, says.

“So I got the job?” he asks, trying to hide his excitement.

She just smiles at him and nods, holding out her hand. “It was nice to finally get to interview you, Stiles. I’ve seen you in here a lot, and I was really hoping that one day you would want to get paid to be here.”

“Sounds like all my dreams come true!” he says with a laugh, shaking her hand.

She laughs and says her goodbyes before Stiles leaves. He looks down at his phone, checking his messages.

**_From: Boymate (13:24): I filled out the paperwork. They said we can move in as early as Monday, but we’re not moving in then. I’ll start cleaning while you’re at school then you can come join me afterwards._ **

**_To: Boymate (13:56): Yes, that’s exactly what I want to do after school. Cleaning. My fav._ **

**_From: Boymate (13:56): Shut up and come home._ **

**_To: Boymate (13:57): Is that you telling me you miss me, Sourwolf? I miss you too ;)_ **

He doesn’t get a response to that, so he puts away his phone and gets into his jeep, driving back home. _Home_. It’s so weird that his home is with Derek now because Derek is his home.

Stiles can’t keep the smile off of his face because he is happy. Stiles is happy for once. He hasn’t felt this way since before his mom got sick. He never thought he could be happy again, but here he is with a job at his favorite place, an amazing boyfriend, two amazing packs, the best friends, the best dad, and his own place to make a home with Derek.

Stiles Stilinski is happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's it. Thank you all for reading. I honestly thought I'd have more chapters, but as I was writing this, it just seemed that it was done. End of story.  
> But I'm not exactly sure I can part with this universe yet, so I'll probably make it into a series.  
> But thank you for reading, giving kudos, and commenting. It really motivated me to keep going. I wish I could give you all hugs!!! I hope you enjoyed this story as much I did writing it. It's honestly the longest story I've ever written.


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